Word Day 7 How’s Your Worship?: Digging Deeper

April 27, 2021 by Carol Graft Leave a Comment

Word Day 7 How’s Your Worship?: Digging Deeper

Carol Graft

April 27, 2021

Digging Deeper,Fear,Follow,Forgiven,Genuine,God,Grace,Humility,Jesus,Praise,Redemption,Relationship,Selfishness,Sin,Worship

Discover the original intent of Scripture. Make good application to our everyday lives.
Become equipped to correctly handle the Word of Truth!

Read His Words Before Ours!

Psalm 103

My soul, bless the Lord, and all that is within me, bless his holy name. 2 My soul, bless the Lord, and do not forget all his benefits.

3 He forgives all your iniquity; he heals all your diseases. 4 He redeems your life from the Pit; he crowns you with faithful love and compassion. 5 He satisfies you with good things; your youth is renewed like the eagle.

6 The Lord executes acts of righteousness and justice for all the oppressed. 7 He revealed his ways to Moses, his deeds to the people of Israel. 8 The Lord is compassionate and gracious, slow to anger and abounding in faithful love. 9 He will not always accuse us or be angry forever. 10 He has not dealt with us as our sins deserve or repaid us according to our iniquities.

11 For as high as the heavens are above the earth, so great is his faithful love toward those who fear him. 12 As far as the east is from the west, so far has he removed our transgressions from us. 13 As a father has compassion on his children, so the Lord has compassion on those who fear him. 14 For he knows what we are made of, remembering that we are dust.

15 As for man, his days are like grass— he blooms like a flower of the field; 16 when the wind passes over it, it vanishes, and its place is no longer known. 17 But from eternity to eternity the Lord’s faithful love is toward those who fear him, and his righteousness toward the grandchildren 18 of those who keep his covenant, who remember to observe his precepts. 19 The Lord has established his throne in heaven, and his kingdom rules over all.

20 Bless the Lord, all his angels of great strength, who do his word, obedient to his command. 21 Bless the Lord, all his armies, his servants who do his will. 22 Bless the Lord, all his works in all the places where he rules. My soul, bless the Lord!

The Original Intent

1) What are the benefits of following the Lord?

In this psalm, David lists a multitude of benefits for following the Lord. Just because David was the one anointed to become king (1 Samuel 16:1-13), didn’t mean he was isolated and protected. He was hunted down to be killed by more than one person, including his own son, Absalom. (2 Samuel 17)

He faced death often, and even before he was chosen as the next king, he was viewed as insignificant. (1 Samuel 17:33) He was also far from perfect. David murdered (2 Samuel 11:14-18), lied (1 Samuel 21:2-3), and committed adultery (2 Samuel 11:2-4). He still suffered the negative effects of those sins. Yet, he penned this psalm of praise, encouraging everyone to follow the Lord because His way is wise, best and overflowing with benefits.

When he committed adultery with Bathsheba (2 Samuel 12:1-15), David experienced the benefit of the Lord’s forgiveness. (verses 3, 9-10) David knew firsthand what it meant to have his life saved from destruction as he was pursued by enemies. (verses 6, 8, and 13)

Because David had experienced the many, gracious benefits of the Lord throughout his life, he confidently proclaimed how the Lord would continue blessing future generations who committed to following the ways of the Lord. (verses 15-19)

We see one evidence of God’s generational blessing specific to David and his son, Solomon, in the genealogy of Jesus in Matthew 1:6.

The Everyday Application

1) What are the benefits of following the Lord?

Because the Lord doesn’t change, the benefits of following Him are the same for us as they were for King David and the generations who followed him. (Numbers 23:19, James 1:17) When Jesus came to earth as God incarnate (in human flesh), those who followed God experienced a fuller manifestation of His benefits. After Jesus ascended back to Heaven, He poured out the Holy Spirit to dwell within those who trusted Him. (Acts 2:4) His presence brought a radical abundance of blessing to God’s people.

For us today, His benefit may not look like a leper being cleansed (Mark 1:40-45), but it could look like a different diagnosis, being healed completely, or having minimal side effects from a treatment. (verse 3) The benefits in the 21st century may be evidenced as the exact provision we need precisely at the time we need it. Deliverance may not be a physical “parting of the Red Sea”, but it could look like your plans suddenly changing, later realizing the shift ended up being better than the original plan. Even running late could be the Lord’s protection and deliverance from a potential accident.

The Lord’s benefits are as simple as a flower’s bloom or as grand as healing, but the most significant benefit from the Lord is forgiveness from sin and redemption from our past. These benefits didn’t end when Jesus died on the cross, they only started there. The price Jesus paid to cover our unrighteousness was for all time. Repent from your sin, believe on the Lord Jesus, and your sins will be washed aw

The Original Intent

2) David repeats the phrase, “the fear of the Lord”; what does this mean?

Fear in this case does not mean being afraid in the sense of terror, rather it means a humble recognition that God is all-powerful and the only One worthy of respect and glory. The fear of the Lord is reverential awe. David’s son, Solomon, would eventually write, “The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom.” (Proverbs 9:10)

Fearing the Lord in the Old Testament looked like sacrifices, but it also was tightly connected to the posture of the heart. (Psalm 51:16-17, Isaiah 1:10-15) Brothers, Cain and Abel, both offered sacrifices, but only one brother’s offering was acceptable. (Genesis 4:4-5) Sacrifices were commanded by God because He wanted His people to understand that sinning against Him breaks His relationship with them. Sin pridefully asserts ourselves against God’s righteousness.

Because God wanted His people to understand the seriousness of sin, and the reality that sin comes at a price, He instituted the Sacrificial System. Depending on the type of sin, sacrifices were required to pay the penalty of sin. Doves, grain, sheep, and bulls (yes, an entire cow!) were offered as atonement for sin when they stepped away from following God and His law. (Leviticus 19) All of this was designed to help Israel understand that fearing the Lord meant realizing God is righteous and holy while we are sinners, separated from Him.

There were a lot of laws to remember, and along the way, Israel’s focus shifted from fearing the Lord to simply managing their behavior with ever-lengthening lists of “how to’s and don’t do’s”. David’s words were a reminder to Israel that fearing the Lord is a good thing; the best thing. Revering the Lord is the right way to live because only in this context, we enjoy a close relationship with the Lord. By walking in the fear of the Lord, God pours out His blessings on generations to come. (verses 13 and 17)

The Everyday Application

2) David repeats the phrase, “the fear of the Lord”; what does this mean?

Even today many view God as angry and vengeful when His “rules” aren’t followed. We tend to miss God’s heart’s desire to have a relationship with us. Still, our sin separates us from Him. This is why Jesus came as God in the flesh! Christ came to earth, sacrificing Himself as the full payment for all sin, demonstrating once and for all that God is merciful and gracious. He loves each person.

In the Old Testament, sin had a sliding scale of “value”. Different sins mandated different types of sacrifices, some more costly than others. There may have been instances of people not being able to provide the sacrifice required, which meant they were still under the burden of unremitted, unforgiven sin. But Jesus!

Jesus paid for all sin, whether large or small, past or present. All sin is sin. There are still consequences to our sins, but if we trust Jesus as our Savior to make payment for our sin and we repent, we are forgiven. The effects of sin remain as long as we are on earth, but the eternal price has been paid at Calvary with Jesus’ blood sacrifice. In our modern age, fearing the Lord should still be the focal point of our everyday lives. His love for us leaves us awestruck!

Even when we are deep in sin, we are still loved and can be rescued! A lifestyle drenched in iniquity, a vice we can’t seem to overcome, even a bad attitude can become like mire and keep us trapped in the pit of sin. When we repent and believe in Christ, choosing to follow Him and His ways, we are rescued from the Pit of Hell! (verse 12) We are no longer separated from God!

In Jesus, God in the flesh mercifully gave Himself for us. Instead of angry judgement, He gives compassion, love and mercy. We should stand in reverential awe of this divine, selfless grace as He wraps us in His love.

The Original Intent

3) Why does David write, “bless the Lord”? I thought God blesses us.

There are several types of psalms including lament, thanksgiving, and praise among others. While some psalms combine themes, Psalm 103 is full of praise as the psalmist, David, lists reasons to “bless the Lord, oh my soul” both individually and corporately with other believers.

David knew how to praise the Lord because he had witnessed the Lord’s kindness in all aspects of life, whether difficult or easy and he wrote many psalms extolling God’s goodness. He literally danced in the street so great was his desire to bless the Lord. (2 Samuel 6:14-22)

David’s “oh my soul” refrain springs from a desire to go deeper in his worshipful adoration of the Lord. In the midst of his praise, David speaks to himself. He isn’t content with merely singing, or even dancing or hand-raising as outward expressions of praise. David wants to praise the Lord from the depths of his being. He wants to be all in for blessing the Lord.

The Everyday Application

) Why does David write, “bless the Lord”? I thought God blesses us.

We know how to bless others, like family and friends, with kind gestures of generosity or a thoughtful phone call, but how do we, mere humans, bless the Lord God Almighty? In our modern culture we use “bless” and “blessing” to mean bestowing gifts or as a description for receiving good things. But blessing the Lord can stem from nothing less than a true heart of worship.

The Lord owns all things and has authority over all things, but He has given us free will to choose whether we will worship Him or worship ourselves. Even as finite human beings, we can indeed bless the Lord by surrendering our hearts in adoring worship to Him. While outward gestures bless people, the Lord looks at our hearts. We can raise our hands, bow our heads, and sing vibrantly, but unless our hearts are humbled before the King of Kings, we aren’t truly blessing Him.

David wanted to praise God from his innermost being, to be completely in for blessing the God who rescued him. Psalm 103 lists a whole slew of reasons (if we needed some help) to give the Lord worship and praise. Let’s tap into the very deep core of our spirit, turning ourselves over in genuine worship to give God the praise and blessing due His name!

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Is there a prerequisite for worship? Yes!

Full surrender to the One who died for us, taking our punishment for sin upon Himself. He, who is blameless and righteous, willingly and humbly took upon Himself our long list of hideous sins that we might be whole, forgiven, and free to worship Him in Spirit.

Birthed by His Spirit, sealed by His Spirit, taught by His Spirit, we who once were dead in our sin, are now awakened to worship Him because of the Spirit alive within us who cries out, “Abba, Father!” (Galatians 4:6)

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Ten Day 11 The Deceit Of Not Enough

August 17, 2020 by Penny Noyes Leave a Comment

Read His Words Before Ours!

Matthew 6:25-34
Psalm 27:1-5
1 Peter 5:5-7
Genesis 3:1-6
Exodus 20:15

Ten, Day 11

“What’s in your hand?”, my mom asked as we walked out of the convenience store. I slowly unwrapped my seven-year-old fingers from the small pack of Now and Later candy I had stolen. The pit in my stomach told me I was in trouble and it was only going to get worse.

“You have to take it back and apologize.” My mom held my hand and led me back into the store. We walked up to the counter and I stared at the pickled pig’s feet in the jar on the counter.

“My daughter has something she would like to tell you,” Mom explained to the clerk. I stretched my hand out and dropped the candy on the counter.

“I’m sorry I took these without paying for them.”
I couldn’t make eye contact, I was so embarrassed. Immediately, I headed for the door.

Once we left, my mom explained I had broken one of the Ten Commandments. Stealing was on the same list as murder. I learned a valuable lesson and cemented an aversion both to pickled pig’s feet and stealing that has stuck with me to this day.

I have since realized my desire to take what isn’t mine goes all the way back to the Garden of Eden. When the serpent convinced Adam and Eve to eat from the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil, they were stealing from God.

One of Satan’s most deceptive strategies involves providing a short-term solution giving us something we want or need, but ultimately keeping us from God’s best.

Though Eve lacked for nothing, Satan enticed her with the forbidden fruit. Just like Adam and Eve, we can be easily convinced God is holding out and we need to meet our own wants or needs.

For many people, our choice to cut corners and take what isn’t ours comes from
a fear God won’t give us what we want,
a sense of entitlement (we deserve what we are taking),
or just plain impatience.

Each of these motivations are based on pride.

Pride means elevating our needs and desires over God and other people.

When we act out of fear, we are choosing to listen to pride’s whispered lie we know more than God and can do a better job providing than He can.

A sense of entitlement elevates our needs and desires over the owner’s rights. Pride tells us our desires are THE MOST important. As Proverbs 16:19 reminds us, “Better to be of lowly spirit with the humble than to divide plunder with the proud.”

Impatience is often rooted in pride and fear, as well. Our pride falsely elevates our ability to know the future, and imposes a man-made deadline on the Creator of the Universe’s capacity to meet our needs. Rather than focusing on God’s unlimited resources and ability, we become focused on our scarce resources and opportunities.

Fear is a weapon Satan often uses to lead us away from God’s best. The best way to fight back is by studying and memorizing Bible verses. God’s Word is a double-edged sword we can use to defeat Satan’s attacks. Dwelling on Scripture builds our faith; faith provides a shield against the fiery arrows Satan uses against us.

At an early age, my mom helped me learn to use this verse to combat fear.
“For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but one of power, love, and sound judgment.”
(2 Timothy 1:7)

This promise breaks through the fear of unmet needs.

“And my God will supply all your needs according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus.” (Philippians 4:19)

When the future looms ahead, murky in uncertainty, let’s remember:

“Therefore I tell you: Don’t worry about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Isn’t life more than food and the body more than clothing? Consider the birds of the sky: They don’t sow or reap or gather into barns, yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Aren’t you worth more than they?” (Matthew 6:25-26)

“The Lord is my light and my salvation
whom should I fear?
The Lord is the stronghold of my life—
whom should I dread?” (Psalm 27:1)

When pride begins to puff our chests and cloud our vision,
let’s pursue humility with His Word:

“Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God, so that he may exalt you at the proper time, casting all your cares on him, because he cares about you.” (1 Peter 5:6-7)

“When arrogance comes, disgrace follows, but with humility comes wisdom.” (Proverbs 11:2)

Whether we’re tempted to pocket a stolen piece of candy, or steal our future from the hands of our loving Father, we’ve seen how God’s command to refrain from stealing addresses the true condition of our hearts.

And when we struggle with fear of scarcity, impatience, or pride, we can counteract Satan’s assaults with Scripture. When fear strikes, we can ask God to lead us to His truth from Scripture to counteract the lies. Let’s turn our focus to our Heavenly Father as we trust in His deep love, His unbounded resources, and His faithful provision.

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The GT Weekend! ~ Open Week 1

August 3, 2019 by Rebecca Adams Leave a Comment

The GT Weekend!

At Gracefully Truthful, weekends aren’t for “checking out”.
Use this time to invite the Almighty’s fullness into you life in a deeper way!
Saturdays and Sundays are a chance to
reflect, rest, and re-center our lives onto Christ.
Don’t miss the opportunity to connect with other women in prayer,
rest your soul in reflective journaling,
and spend time worshiping the Creator who
longs for intimacy with each of us!

Worship Through Journaling

1) Sit still, Bible open, pen ready. This could be harder, and more convicting, than we’d like to admit. Open to Luke 19:6-7. Read these two verses over and over, slowly, quickly, again. Pray over them as you read, asking the Spirit to stir your heart. The rejected, hated, outcast man was downright giddy to be welcomed in. The ‘righteous’ crowds? The despised Jesus’ actions. Disgusted. Angry. Who sits at your table? Who is on your ‘to invite over’ list? Who do you spend time, talent, and treasure loving on? Write down those names, they are important and Jesus loves them and how you invest! But is anyone offended by your willingness to love the ugly, outcast, hated, rejected? Beg the Holy Spirit to bring to mind those faces, because maybe you don’t know their names, who you could invite in, but very intentionally haven’t. Write down those names, they are important and Jesus loves them; He’s calling you to invest!

2) Radical, generous hospitality finds its roots in obedience. But not blind obedience to a cosmic being dictating morally good acts. Rather, truly loving hospitality stems from obedience grown from the bedrock of deep, abiding faith. The knowing who God is and trusting His heart. Is your openness towards generosity feeling a little rusty or maybe even stingy? How’s your faith? Who do you say God is? Is He faithful and trustworthy enough to provide for you? How stingy do you view Him?

3) Yesterday, Parker challenged us to ask the Lord a question when we begin to interact with someone we find challenging to love, let alone like. “Jesus, show me what you love about them.” Challenge yourself to take this question to the next level this weekend by journaling out the names of the people in your closest circle. Maybe your closest friends, your spouse and children, or parents and siblings. One by one, pray over these names and ask the Lord this question, writing down what the Spirit brings to mind. Remember these aren’t qualities you admire, rather you’re asking the Lord for His vantage point. Then, take the opportunity when presented to share these small treasures with each person you named!

Praying Scripture back to the One who wrote it in the first place is a great way to jump start our prayer-life! Pray this passage from Matthew 25:40 back to the Lord and
let His Spirit speak to you through it!

“And the King will answer them, ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me.’

Prayer Journal
Lord, in brokenness I come to You. My total inability to love like You is so evident as I live out this precious life You’ve given me. I mis-prioritize, I choose my comfort over going beyond myself, I choose my schedule over loving intentionally because it’s costly, it’s difficult, and mostly because I am selfish. Lord, make me new. Not once, but over and over and over. Remind me that You are always on the horizon, arms spread wide celebrating when I return and ask You to fill me again. I want to love like you, Abba. Remind me that only when I sit here with You, like father and child, can I love others well and, in so doing, show You love. May my life declare Your love, Lord!

Worship Through Community

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Kaleidoscope Day 8 A Quick Trip to Isolation

June 26, 2019 by Rebecca Adams 2 Comments

Read His Words Before Ours!

Numbers 12:1-16
Proverbs 12:18
1 Peter 4:7-8
1 John 4:7-11

Kaleidoscope, Day 8

To love is to commit to paying a costly price.
To love is to commit to messy, broken relationships.
To love is to commit to being hurt.

The alternative?
Isolation.

The on-ramp to safe isolation, far away from great cost, mess, brokenness, and excruciating pain?
Rudeness.

Extreme?
Well, I’ll let you decide.

Surely, there are other, more clear symptoms of isolation and lack of love, right?
Traits like anger, bitterness, and hatred seem pretty key in a successful journey to isolation.

True, these traits are clear evidences of having lived a life in attempt to keep a heart safe from the costly effects of love, but these are destination signposts, not on-ramps.
One who is perpetually angry, bitter, and hateful has already succeeded in staying away from love.

But rudeness.
There is the attractive little signpost flashing brilliantly along a benign highway, promising a quick detour to safety and self-justification.
“Just a little rudeness,” the lie begins.
“Just a little self-protection.”
“You deserve, no, you have a right, to be rude.”
One sweet little sampling of lies after another and our quick detour lands us far off course, well on our way to Isolation.

Not sure you believe me?
I present you with a true story….

A widely respected, deeply kind, and exceptionally humble man had been given the opportunity for a highly visible leadership position, despite his genuine objections. He had no desire for power or profit, but was compelled to take the position out of love and respect for authority above him.

While he made some mistakes, he genuinely loved the people he led, and continually sacrificed his own good for their own. From the outside, it was plainly obvious what a rare, and incredible leader this man was.

Like any leadership role, it came with its share of criticisms and complaints directed towards him, but the one to whom he reported was constantly watching his back. Often, the man overlooked the negativity, not allowing it to deter him from his strong, gentle leadership. Other times, it drove him absolutely batty to the point of near insanity, but always the one above him, protected him.

The man was in this specific leadership role for over 40 years and there was no end to complaints filed against him as he was constantly under attack for his extremely difficult position. Curiously, the records of his career carefully chronicle one specific incident out of the mass lump sum.
One incident with incredible detail.
One incident of blatant rudeness.
Ending with isolation.

The man had a deeply devoted sister whom he loved, but she was beginning to feel as if she deserved some of leadership’s limelight. Unlike her honorable brother, she wanted the attention and the power. She saw the neon flashing lights on the highway and she exited onto “Rude”. She tossed a handful of caustic words in the air, feeling quite justified. Her words were seemingly harmlessly, but undeniably drenched in rudeness. Her rudeness was heard and felt. As a result, she found herself granted a personal audience with the one in authority who had heard her curt remarks.
And it wasn’t pretty.
I’ll let you listen in…

“Listen to what I say:
If there is a prophet among you from the Lord,
I make myself known to him in a vision;
I speak with him in a dream.
Not so with my servant Moses;
he is faithful in all my household.
I speak with him directly,
openly, and not in riddles;
he sees the form of the Lord.
So why were you not afraid to speak against my servant Moses?”
The Lord’s anger burned against them, and He left. (Numbers 12:6-9, emphasis added)

Sister Miriam’s words were intended to hurt. She wanted to make her point known. She set out to amplify her perspective even if it cost her being just a bit rude in order to justify her position against a man who was not only her leader, but also her brother.

The Lord heard, He saw her heart of arrogance, He felt her rudeness, and called her out on it. He took up the cause of Moses, fighting on his behalf, because God is a just and loving God. When it was all said and done, the Lord’s presence left Miriam and her sympathizing brother, Aaron, alone. What’s more, the Lord also gave Miriam a skin disease as He left her as further consequence of her rudeness. Moses, the loving leader, pleaded with the Lord for healing on behalf of his sister, which the Lord gave, but He also said, “If her father had merely spit in her face (as a consequence), wouldn’t she remain in disgrace for seven days? Let her be confined outside the camp (as a consequence to her rudeness) for seven days; after that she may come back.” (Numbers 12:14)

Her rudeness was disgraceful.
Her rudeness was not loving.
Her rudeness was sinful.
Her rudeness brought isolation.

Miriam took the easy exit off the highway of genuine, authentic Love, and she ended up alone.
How often I’ve done the same!
Rudeness is like an arrow jutting into the people around us. (Proverbs 12:18)

The Lord is a God of unconditional love.
He is a triune God who Himself dwells eternally in community.
Isolation and rudeness have no place in His character,
and neither do they in ours as we take on the Name of Christ.

Maybe you can identify scenarios where you tend to take that quick trip to Isolation via the on-ramp of rudeness. Maybe you can identify people you’ve alienated or perhaps you’ve become familiar with that sense of distancing you feel when you choose to be rude.

Or maybe, just maybe, you know someone who habitually takes that glittery exit called Rude. You see them isolating themselves.
In fact, you want to be isolated from them because of their sharp, cutting habits.
But, I wonder, what if the Lord intended for you to love them with His love, drawing them back just as He did with Miriam. Just as He does for me when I’m rude, again and again.

Suppose He is equipping us to love those who are rude, and to stand at that exit sign,
pointing the way back to Love?!

To love another is worth the high price it will cost us.
It’s worth the mess.
it’s worth the pain of entering into the brokenness.

How do I know?
Jesus did it for me.

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Thanks for joining us today as we journeyed into Kaleidoscope Week Two! Don’t miss out on the discussion below – we’d love to hear your thoughts!

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Sketched V Day 3 Saul, The Persecutor

January 30, 2019 by Sara Cissell Leave a Comment

Sketched V Day 3 Saul, The Persecutor

Sara Cissell

January 30, 2019

Anger,Jesus,persecution,Saul,Selfishness,Sin,Sketched

Read His Words Before Ours!

Acts 5:33-8:3
Acts 26:1-23
Psalm 110

Somehow the prisoners had escaped!

Not only had they escaped, but they had literally returned to doing exactly what I had imprisoned them for in the first place: preaching in the name of Jesus.
Even now the guards were returning to the Temple to bring them back before the Council. What level of geniuses are we dealing with? Obviously, they are not in their right minds to disregard the commands of this authority.

We are the Council.
We are the teachers of the Law.
We decide if you are in good standing before God.

The more I thought about their disrespect of our authority, the angrier I became.
A few of the members of the Council laughed about a recent happening in the marketplace as we waited, and I caught the eye of the man facing me.
I’m not completely sure what my facial expression communicated, but the smile on the other man’s face dimmed and their conversation dropped several decibels. Maybe idiots aren’t only outside this group.
Scandalous disrespect for the Torah and our traditional laws is no laughing matter.

When the guards arrived with the prisoners in tow, I stared at the leader.
If I caught his eye, maybe I could convey a similar message to him as I had to my compatriot. I intensified my gaze and straightened my spine.

The high priest questioned them as to why they had disobeyed their previous orders to stop teaching in the name of Jesus and the leader had the gall to promptly reply that they were obeying God rather than man.

We are the authorities God put in place.
We are the teachers of the Law.
We are the ones who know the texts and are required to implement them.
Who is this man that implies he has heard from God and we have not?
Disgusting arrogance!

By now my temperature was rising and my hands were clenched tightly in my lap. I willed the leader to look my direction, but he continued to boldly meet the eyes of the high priest. It was a mercy he did not look my way. If looks could kill…

Suddenly Gamaliel stood and directed the guards to take the men outside. Once the doors were closed, Gamaliel addressed the group and suggested the men be released. He reasoned that in previous uprisings of this sort, incidents faded away once the leaders were gone. He instructed us to remain out of the scenario just in case they truly were speaking for the Lord.

Gamaliel is a well-respected, wise man, but my anger burned at his plan. These followers had already proven disregard for our authority, and I did not foresee that changing if we simply let them go. Thankfully, someone echoed my thoughts and agreement arose to flog the prisoners before releasing them. I barely controlled myself. Flogging? I scoffed under my breath, these traitors deserved nothing less than death.

Some time later, I found myself once again sitting among Council members as another follower stood before us. Stephen was his name. Accusations against him had been raised and we’d called him before us. The high priest asked him for the truth and suddenly I found myself listening to a history lesson. How degrading to have such a lesson from one so inferior. He covered the gambit from Abraham to Joseph to Moses to King Solomon.

My patience waning quickly, I hoped my distaste was clearly communicated each time I ignored his words and smoothed my robes, my every action mocking him with disdain. Every muscle tensed and my heart began to race as he closed his argument by saying, “You stiff-necked people with uncircumcised hearts and ears! You are always resisting the Holy Spirit. As your ancestors did, you do also. Which of the prophets did your ancestors not persecute? They even killed those who foretold the coming of the Righteous One, whose betrayers and murderers you have now become. You received the law under the direction of angels and yet have not kept it.”

The atmosphere in the room shifted.
Necks went red and white knuckles appeared.

Stephen continued as he stared to heaven, “Behold, I see the heavens opened up and the Son of Man standing at the right hand of God.”

The first man stood up and growled low. He broke the floodgates and a wave of men drove Stephen to the city gates. I hurried along with them, grateful my thoughts paralleled those around me. Death was coming quickly for this heretic!
Once we cleared the city gates, the men began shedding the robes and entrusting them to me. If this enabled them to more accurately select their stones and aim well, I would gratefully take care of their robes. I would be a unifying player in the destruction of this uprising.

As the stones flew, meeting their mark. Stephen cried out, “Lord Jesus, receive my spirit!” He fell to his knees and cried once more, “Lord, do not hold this sin against them!” The thud of stones hitting soft flesh and others colliding mid-air lasted only minutes. As the rage lessened and the evidence of the stoning’s success was apparent, the men gradually returned to me and gathered their robes. They dusted them off, pulling them back on as though this was any normal day’s work.

As the last robe was retrieved and I found myself standing alone at the city gates, Stephen’s last words reverberated in my mind. “Lord, do not hold this sin against them.”
This sin?
Against us?
He asked God for forgiveness.

Forgiveness for me?

I shuddered at the thought, at all the thoughts that began swirling much too close to the surface, bringing a heaviness aching in my chest.
Hatred for Stephen and all followers like him silenced the thoughts.
Determined, I turned my steps back to the Temple.
Stephen would not be the last to learn their proper place at my hands.

Forgiveness?
No.

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arrogance,death,forgiveness,hate,persecutor,stones,The Law

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