Pause VIII, Day 6 A Collect In Exhaustion
Pause VIII ~ Day Six
His Words Before Ours
The alarm goes off.
We drag disbelieving eyelids open, and groan inwardly (or maybe outwardly, too).
I can’t possibly do it all again today, our minds rebel.
Yet it all must be done, so we haul ourselves, and our exhaustion, from the bed.
In her book, The Gifts of Imperfection, research professor, author, and storyteller Brené Brown describes how American culture proudly wears exhaustion as a status symbol. I highly recommend the book and completely agree with her assessment, but that’s not the type of exhaustion I’m talking about today.
I’m talking about the soul-permeating exhaustion that happens as you scream-cry in the car before driving to the hospital for day 12 of an admission for your child’s new and shocking cancer diagnosis.
I’m talking about the stifling exhaustion that settles on your chest when you’re awake at 4 am, numbly staring into the darkness a week after your parent dies unexpectedly.
I’m talking about the exhaustion that clouds your vision, and fans the panic burning in your gut, as you stare at the growing list of past due bills, knowing the unemployment payments ran out weeks or months ago.
I’m talking about the obliterating exhaustion of caregiving, the kind that mixes with the shame of not doing more or better, with only the devastation of loss as “hope” of relief.
This type of exhaustion can’t be alleviated by re-evaluating our priorities, learning to say “no,” or reworking our calendars. It must simply be survived.
Today’s collect is a heart-cry to the only One who is able to sustain us in the midst of such crushing exhaustion.
A Collect in Exhaustion
Sustaining One,
who is boundless in strength, compassion, and generosity:
when life hollows us to echoing emptiness and we have abandoned desperately clawing the dusty floors of our own storehouses,
let us collapse into You, our Father, who runs to gather us up into Your everlasting arms,
that in You alone we might find endurance to make it through,
an ever-firming faith,
and rest at the last,
through Jesus Christ our Lord, amen.
Today’s Collect Components
Address: Sustaining One,
Doctrine: who is boundless in strength, compassion, and generosity:
Petition: when life hollows us to echoing emptiness and we have abandoned the desperate act of clawing the dusty floors of our own storehouses,
let us collapse into You, our Father, who runs to gather us up into Your everlasting arms,
Aspiration: that in You alone we might find endurance to survive,
faith made stronger,
and soul rest at last,
Mediation: through Jesus Christ our Lord, amen.
Meditate & Reflect
1) Consider the beauty of a welcoming God depicted in these two passages:
“But while the son was still a long way off,
his father saw him and was filled with compassion.
He ran to him, threw his arms around his neck, and kissed him.”
(Luke 15:20)
“The God of old is your dwelling place,
and underneath are the everlasting arms.”
(Deuteronomy 33:27)
Friend, if you are barely surviving in the place of crushing exhaustion, let these words sink into your soul. As you meditate, imagine God seeing you, overflowing with compassion, running to you, and wrapping you in His arms. Imagine His everlasting arms holding you to His chest, safe and loved. Then, tell Him about it. All of it, every honest and painful second. Allow His presence to comfort you.
I
2) If your community offers practical support, take it. If they offer to help, let them. Is this something you are willing to do? Wrestle with why or why not.
3) Sisters, if you are not currently stumbling through the wilderness of exhaustion, chances are good someone around you is. Spend a few minutes prayerfully brainstorming to whom and how you can show God’s love and support to someone who desperately needs it. Finally, spend a few minutes interceding on behalf of whomever God brings to mind.
This, dear sisters, is the beauty of living in holy community.
Worship
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