Focus Day 11 Giving Space And Losing Control

James 4:13-5:6
Proverbs 8:22-36
Jonah 1

Focus, Day 11

I sat at her kitchen island, just as I’ve done dozens of times, while we chatted about everything from her husband eating her famous sugar cookies even though they were stale, to how we both need accountability to get stuff done.
We laughed, we cried, and we talked about the Lord.
Then, as always, she said something profound. Had it been a morsel of food, it would’ve made my jaw sore from the chewing I’ve done over it.

“Don’t we all try to play God at times?
When we make decisions on our own outside of Him, even minor ones, we are taking control into our own hands and trying to play God. It is a sin every time.” 

Mic drop. 

How many times have I tried to play God?
How many times have I greatly impacted my life and my future because I forgot God is the sovereign One?
Lots; lots and lots of times.

I have thrown wisdom and God’s sovereignty to the wayside in pursuit of what my flesh and human heart felt best. I have placed my treasure in worldly values like human love, home decor, clothing, and my own vain pursuits. I’ve spent time in Scripture, studying the exact verses we just read, (up at the top, seriously, read His Words before mine!) and yet, I stubbornly refused to seek His wisdom or surrender to His sovereignty.

I am guilty of trying to play God. 

About nine months ago, my world came crashing in.
Literally nothing in my life looks the same today.
Different house.
Different car.
Different family make-up.
and the list goes on….

As the walls caved in, I told the Lord:
“I’ve tried to do it without You. I’ve done things my way because I didn’t trust You, and I’m through. I’m done with that. From this moment on, You must have all control because I’ve made a mess by myself.” 

Has this change come easily? Nope. In fact, I struggle every single day to surrender to Him.

I struggled to surrender when He told me to let go of a relationship I was clinging to with all of my might.

I struggled to surrender when He told me to give my Aldi gift card to a family while they were grocery shopping.

I struggled to surrender when I thought I felt I should pursue a job He told me not to pursue.

I struggled to surrender when He didn’t heal my sister on this side of Heaven.

Even still, I’m telling ya’ sister, my life is infinitely richer when I surrender control and pursue His wisdom over mine.

On Sunday, our pastor talked a bit about Jonah, the prophet who ran in the literal opposite direction of where God was calling Him. As I thought about Jonah and his infamous journey, which God still used (because He’s sovereign) to redeem an entire city,
I was reminded of my own “opposite-direction-journeys”.

Many times, God has given me clear direction in His word or by His Spirit, and I’ve literally turned the opposite way, running as fast as possible.  Sometimes, I’ve tripped over my own feet so quickly, it wasn’t long before I humbly returned to give God back my surrendered heart.

However, there have been times where I took off running with a nice pace going before realizing I’d been running away and was now quickly drowning as a result of my prideful insistence on my own ways. Here, God has come to my rescue, pulling me from the waves just as Jesus did with Peter so many years ago.
I don’t want to be Jonah. 

While I’m so thankful God can still redeem our disobedience when we try to “Play God”, it would be great if I never had to trip or drown to begin with.

Our lives are fleeting. We are just vapors in the wind of time.
How foolish of me to spend my life running from the One who loves me most!
How foolish of me to trust my life to my own futile hands!
Doesn’t it only make sense to trust the Almighty Father who sees and knows everything for He alone is the giver of Wisdom?!

I complained to my therapist recently about how busy I’d been.
I hadn’t accomplished anything I had wanted to because other things kept popping up.

“Are you praying about if God actually wants you to do the things that keep ‘popping up’?”, he asked.
“Um… no”, I said with an embarrassed giggle.
Because DUH! Why wouldn’t I ask Him?
Following God, surrendering our lives to His control and infinite wisdom is sometimes simpler than we make it out to be.
It’s praying about who to spend our time on.
It’s praying about where to emotionally or monetarily invest.
It’s praying about when to say no to a ministry and when to say yes.
Because living out His wisdom begins with the realization that He is sovereign, we are not, and His ways are better than my foolish, prideful attempts at control.

I get it! It’s easy to get caught up in trying to do what looks or feels right, that we leave God out. But “playing God” never ends well.

When we surrender to the loving Father,
we are giving space for His wisdom to press into us and overflow onto others.

Sisters, I feel like we’ve just finished eating a Thanksgiving meal in ten minutes… we’ve shoved so much into our mouths we are having a hard time chewing. So, pause, maybe re-read this Journey or the verses at the beginning (because you did that, right?!), and ask the Lord to illuminate His Wisdom just for you.

Take time tomorrow to dig deeper by doing the “Digging Deeper” that follows this Journey. (and if you aren’t waking up to that in your inbox, start now!)
Together, let’s choose God’s wisdom as we daily, moment-by-moment surrender to His sovereign, loving control.

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