Read His Words Before Ours!
“Who am I, Lord?
What have you called me to do?”
As 2017 steamrolled towards the new year, I found myself asking the Lord these questions. Deep, probing, and potentially strange for a 35-year-old, single woman to be asking, but the queries were bubbling up from within and wanted answers.
While a desperation to know those answers caused the words to tumble from my mouth, a vulnerability tempted me to try and snatch them back.
You know who you are. Why do you need to ask?
You’re a daughter of the Most High God.
You’re a mother to many.
You are dearly loved by your family and close friends.
Regardless of those truths that came to mind, my identity still lacked the security for which I longed.
I quickly realized one reason for the insecurity came from
the equally loud, and sometimes more persistent, inner voice,
combatting the truth.
Yes, you are a daughter of the Most High God.
Don’t forget: so is the Christian woman sitting next to you. Humble yourself and keep pride at bay.
Mother to many, true, but you don’t have kids of your own,
so do those people really count?
You are dearly loved by many, but who does God say you are?
Just because people loved you doesn’t mean you were being who God says you are and you are to be.
As I pondered the thoughts battling back and forth in my mind,
I discovered just how impactful a voice of authority is.
I asked the Lord those questions because He is the highest authority.
I can remind myself of who I am,
I can wait for others to validate who I am,
and I can also have others diminish who I am,
if I give them permission to do so.
However, when I inquire of the Lord,
He speaks the truth,
And when He speaks the truth,
nothing can refute it.
Nothing can remove it.
The Lord’s identification is the bedrock of who we are.
He is the One that calls us by name.
He is the One that leads us through life.
He is the One that challenges us to become more like Him.
He is the One that loves us with infinite grace and mercy.
He is the One that can say we are all co-heirs with Christ and yet love us individually with deep intimacy.
Sometimes we need to be reminded of who the Lord says we are
by hearing it in His voice, and not our internal ones.
That means reading it straight from His Word,
and listening with our minds and hearts.
I wonder how much King David battled with similar thoughts.
Initially his thoughts may have centered on why the Lord would have chosen him as king.
Then, in the midst of the years waiting to become king, and staying alive while Saul hunted him down,
“What are you doing, Lord? You said I was king, right?”
Potentially, even reaching the point after his sinful, adulterous affair with Bathsheba asking, “Why am I still king?”
While I do not know the reality of these questions,
I do know that David reminded himself of truth.
In Psalm 23, he states, “you anoint my head with oil.”
The Lord sent Samuel to anoint David as the next king. David did not ascend the throne and actually rule as king for several years after this, years in which the then-current King, Saul, tried to remove David as a perceived threat to himself. However, the Lord had chosen David and that would not be undone.
His identity was intact regardless of the circumstances.
If I were David, those moments of truth would be ones I would revisit often, especially when doubting who I am or what the Lord had called me to do.
So, has the Lord answered my own questions yet?
I actually think I will be asking them for the rest of my life,
which is wise the more I think about it.
He speaks the Word in season and defines my roles in time.
He is my shepherd, in every moment, of every day, ready to speak truth over me.
Today as I write, I come back to the truth foretold in Isaiah, and that which was spoken by Jesus in Luke 4:18.
“The Spirit of the Lord is on me, because he has anointed me to preach good news to the poor. He has sent me to proclaim release to the captives and recovery of sight to the blind, to set free the oppressed, to proclaim the year of the Lord’s favor.”
Make me more like You, Jesus.
Shepherd my heart to hear your voice of truth!
Embracing God’s fullness in our lives is rooted in scripture and memorizing His word is vital to our continued growth and depth with Jesus. Tap and hold from your mobile device to download this week’s verse and make it your phone’s lockscreen!