intimacy

Beloved Day 12 Seasons Of Love: Digging Deeper

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Digging Deeper Days

Finding the original intent of Scripture and making good application to our everyday lives as we become equipped to correctly handle the Word of Truth!

Yesterday’s Journey Study connects with today’s!
Check out Seasons Of Love!

The Questions

1) Why might the woman have paused before opening the door to her loved one (verse 3)?

2) Why did the man not continue to wait for her to open the door (verse 6)?

3) Verse 7 seems to indicate abuse of the woman. What might be the significance of this being included in the passage?

4) How does the woman express her disappointment of not finding her loved one? (verse 8)

Song of Solomon 5:3-8

3 I have taken off my clothing. How can I put it back on? I have washed my feet. How can I get them dirty? 4 My love thrust his hand through the opening, and my feelings were stirred for him. 5 I rose to open for my love. My hands dripped with myrrh, my fingers with flowing myrrh on the handles of the bolt. 6 I opened to my love, but my love had turned and gone away. My heart sank because he had left. I sought him, but did not find him. I called him, but he did not answer.

7 The guards who go about the city found me. They beat and wounded me; they took my cloak from me—the guardians of the walls. 8 Young women of Jerusalem, I charge you, if you find my love, tell him that I am lovesick.

Original Intent

1) Why might the woman have paused before opening the door to her loved one (verse 3)?
Since this book is not a chronological account of the events between Solomon and his beloved, there are some difficult passages to unravel. This one is no exception. In verse 2 of the chapter, we read the bride’s words, “I was sleeping, but my heart was awake.” As in chapter 3 verse 1, we are left with questions about the sequence and the reality of the couple’s actions in this scene. Is the young woman dreaming, or is she at the drowsy verge of being awakened? Since many Bible commentators have come to different conclusions, it seems unnecessary to dwell too long in a discussion about this. More importantly is the big picture. In these verses we encounter a scenario of a real-life relationship which included human responses. The young woman knows her loved one is at the door, but she is either too tired or too lazy to get up, get dressed, and open the door for him. David Guzik says, “her problem was not that she didn’t go to the door; but that she did it so slowly and reluctantly, making excuses all along the way. [This reveals she was] thinking only about her comfort and not at all about Solomon’s desires or her relationship with him.” (enduringword.com)

2) Why did the man not continue to wait for her to open the door (verse 6)?
The woman’s lover reminded her that he was standing on the outside waiting. “Open to me, my sister, my darling, my dove, my perfect one. For my head is drenched with dew, my hair with droplets of the night.” (verse 2) Whether or not the terms in verse 4 are explicit references regarding sexual intimacy, the scene certainly portrays an active pursuit of one lover desiring to be with the other, but being met with rejection. I think the best interpretation is to read this within the framework Guzik describes as a “missed connection” between the bride and groom, and therefore we should apply it literally rather than symbolically. (enduringword.com) The groom has been waiting patiently outside the door of the bride’s room. As he was leaving, he likely placed myrrh on the door handle as was customary in ancient settings. We are not given the reasons why the woman paused, but the delay causes her beloved to leave. It does not appear he was angry with her, and the emphasis again seems to be on the passion of the bride once she realizes his loving gesture. The bride’s emotions are awakened and she has legitimate feelings of despair because her loved one can’t be found.

3) Verse 7 seems to indicate abuse of the woman. What might be the significance of this being included in the passage?
In chapter 3 we read how the watchmen were helpful to the woman as she frantically sought her beloved. But now verse 7 seems so out of place. What is happening? In then-current day, there were two sorts of watchmen in a city. One guarded from the inside of a city wall to ensure all those within were safe and secure. The others were placed on the walls themselves to watch and give notice of an enemy approaching. (Bible Study Tools, David Gill) The watchmen on the wall would be aware that the only women who would be on the streets at night were prostitutes. Not realizing who she is, they treat her with inappropriate disregard, even abusing her. Whether a dream or reality, we surely feel the stab to our hearts as we read what the bride endured as she runs out into the night. She so desires to find the one she loves that she risks her wellbeing to search for him. Nothing is mentioned about her response to what she experiences, but we share her anguish over not finding her groom. These verses are communicating unrelenting passion and desire between a bride and her groom at all costs.

4) How does the woman express her disappointment of not finding her loved one? (verse 8)
We have read in the previous chapters how the couple speaks to one another with words describing their longing for, and their satisfaction in, one another. Here in verse 8, the bride begins to plead with the women of the town to help her find her groom. It appears she has deep regret over her rejection of his advances, and she now wants to let him know how much she longs for him.  In Song of Solomon 2:4-6, the bride expresses her soul’s desire toward her new groom in those pleasant moments of marital intimacy and passion. She was overwhelmed by the presence of love and the joy of lovemaking. Here in chapter 5, the young woman aches over the distance she has created with her beloved. She has become physically and emotionally ill due to her yearning love for him. She asks the city’s women to “tell him that I am lovesick.” The Septuagint (the Greek translation of the Hebrew OT) uses the verb titrosko which means inflicted with a wound, injured, damaged. The Shulamite woman is emotionally and physically overwrought. (preceptaustin.org) Within the context, we can surmise she is craving more moments with the groom. She grieves the way she let him slip away due to her unwillingness to respond when he came to her.

Everyday Application

1) Why might the woman have paused before opening the door to her loved one (verse 3)?
We don’t know all the motives behind why the bride doesn’t go to the door. She expresses it would be somewhat of a hassle since she has already changed clothes, whether it is weariness or laziness, we are not sure. What we discover as we read further in the passage, though, is that she regrets her inaction to open the door to her beloved. While there will be times in marriage that one person lacks a desire to make much effort toward intimacy (due to fatigue or distress), we should not make it a habit to neglect our spouse’s need for sexual and physical closeness. This will likely require ongoing conversation and work in our relationships as we strive for a healthy marriage. As we think about this in spiritual terms, we can also pray for our hearts to be receptive to our Beloved Savior. Bible teacher Harry Ironside says this is a great picture of our own callousness toward Divine Love. “When [Christ] comes to the heart’s door we practically say, ‘No; it is inconvenient. I do not want to drop things right now.’” What an even greater tragedy to reject God’s perfect love. (John 3:16-19)

2) Why did the man not continue to wait for her to open the door (verse 6)?
The bottom line of this verse is how the groom was demonstrating his desire for his bride. He was patient. He did not force his way in, nor did he demand her to meet his expectations. Instead, he waited and then quietly slipped away, but not before leaving a symbol of his love. What beautiful restraint and gentleness was shown by this man. Although his loved one did not receive him in the way he expected, he chose kindness. Putting a fragrance on the bolt handles would have been akin to leaving flowers by the door. Sometimes in marriage we don’t feel the emotional attachment to our husband. When that happens, we can begin by praying for God to stir passion in us. Years ago, I heard a woman Bible teacher talk about how she prayed for her marriage. She said one of her prayers was that she would “always thrill to her husband’s touch.” That is a good start! Whether we are the initiator or the one waiting, our goal should be to demonstrate unrelenting love. Friend, maybe you feel that any sign of promising light is so far in the distance you are unable to see it. I pray you will not lose hope. God will be faithful as you pursue a passionate and lasting marriage.

3) Verse 7 seems to indicate abuse of the woman. What might be the significance of this being included in the passage?
The picture of the beloved bride of the king being assaulted by his own watchmen is appalling! Whether she is dreaming or is in fact walking around at night like a prostitute, she is a desperate woman in search of the one her heart longs to be near. She has felt the pangs of dismissing her lover’s kind and patient pursuit. It has been said that “absence makes the heart grow fonder.” I doubt that is always true as I have seen absence push people apart. But one of the ways we can create a healthy kind of distance that inspires desire is to rehearse the benefits of being married to our husband. When marriages are struggling, it is hard to find the good in the other person. Our human tendency is to rehearse our weariness with it all. As we do, we only add to our growing list of reasons not to make efforts. However, when alone with our thoughts, considering the good things of our marriage and the positive characteristics of our husbands helps stir our emotions toward desire. As the bride longed to find her beloved groom, God can restore our passions as we pray and work to bridge the gap we may or may not have caused.

4) How does the woman express her disappointment of not finding her loved one? (verse 8)
The Shulamite woman had gone from being “too tired” to being “lovesick.” She desperately went searching for the one her heart so deeply loved. She called those around her to join her in her search. Sister, enlist your own army of women to support you in your marriage. No, I’m not asking you to find friends to whom you can badmouth your husband. I am encouraging you to gather those around you who will remind you to “love your husbands … so God’s word will not be slandered.” (Titus 2:4) It is not an easy journey, this thing called marriage. But with God’s help, and with friends pointing us to Christ, we can pursue the kind of passionate relationship we read of in Song of Solomon!

What do YOU think?! Share Here!
Missing the connection to our other Journey Study?
Catch up with Seasons Of Love!

Digging Deeper is for Everyone!

1) Take this passage (or any other passage).
2) Read it, and the verses around it,
several times
3) Write down your questions
as you think of them.
4) Ask specific culture related questions and be ready to dig around for your answers. Google them, use www.studylight.org, or look them up in a study Bible and read the footnotes (click on the little letters next to a word and it will show you
other related verses!). (www.esvbible.org)
5) Check your applications with other trusted Christians that you are in community with and embrace the fullness of God
in your everyday!

Digging Deeper Community

Share What You’ve Learned!
Pray Together!
Join us in the GT Facebook Community!

Our Current Study Theme!

This is Beloved Week Three!
Don’t miss out on the discussion!
Sign up to receive every GT Journey Study!

Why Dig Deeper?

Finding the original meaning is a huge deal when we study Scripture and can make all the difference in our understanding as we apply God’s truths to our everyday lives.

In our modern-day relationships, we want people to understand our original intention as we communicate; how much more so between God and humanity?!

Here’s a little bit more on why we take Digging Deeper so seriously.

Study Tools

We love getting help while we study and www.studylight.org is one of many excellent resources, providing the original Hebrew (Old Testament) or Greek (New Testament) with an English translation.

Want to know more about a specific word in a verse? Click on “Strong’s Interlinear Bible” then click the word you’d like to study. Discover “origin”, “definition” and hear the original pronunciation – That Is Awesome!

Want more background? Click “Study Tools”, then pick a few commentaries to read their scholarly approach, keeping in mind that just because a commentary says it, doesn’t mean it’s true. (just like the internet :-))

Memorize It!

Download this week’s verse and make it your phone’s lockscreen!
Tap and hold on your mobile device to save.

Blessed Day 9 Intimacy: Digging Deeper

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Digging Deeper Days

Finding the original intent of Scripture and making good application to our everyday lives as we become equipped to correctly handle the Word of Truth!

Yesterday’s Journey Study connects with today’s!
Check out Intimacy!

The Questions

1) Who are the lovers featured in Song of Solomon 7:1-13?

2) Why does the Bible include these passages about sex and intimacy?

3) What does it mean that the woman has treasured up every delicacy, old and new, for her love? (verse 13)

Song of Solomon 7:1-13

How beautiful are your sandaled feet, princess!
The curves of your thighs are like jewelry,
the handiwork of a master.
3 Your breasts are like two fawns,
twins of a gazelle.
4 Your neck is like a tower of ivory,
your eyes like pools in Heshbon
by Bath-rabbim’s gate.
Your nose is like the tower of Lebanon
looking toward Damascus.
5 Your head crowns you like Mount Carmel,
the hair of your head like purple cloth—
a king could be held captive in your tresses.
6 How beautiful you are and how pleasant,
my love, with such delights!
7 Your stature is like a palm tree;
your breasts are clusters of fruit.
8 I said, “I will climb the palm tree
and take hold of its fruit.”
May your breasts be like clusters of grapes,
and the fragrance of your breath like apricots.
9 Your mouth is like fine wine—

Woman
flowing smoothly for my love,
gliding past my lips and teeth!
10 I am my love’s,
and his desire is for me.

11 Come, my love,
let’s go to the field;
let’s spend the night among the henna blossoms.
12 Let’s go early to the vineyards;
let’s see if the vine has budded,
if the blossom has opened,
if the pomegranates are in bloom.
There I will give you my caresses.
13 The mandrakes give off a fragrance,
and at our doors is every delicacy,
both new and old.
I have treasured them up for you, my love.

Original Intent

1) Who are the lovers featured in Song of Solomon 7:1-13?
The biblical book Song of Solomon, or Song of Songs, as it is sometimes called, was written by Solomon sometime between 971 and 931 BC. Most scholars believe the lovers are Solomon and his wife, though which wife is not as clear. Author Tom Gledhill asserts in his book The Message of the Song of Songs that instead of being Solomon and his lover, “The couple are representative types of Everyman and Everywoman” (94) Whether we view Song of Solomon as a true love story between two specific people or simply as an example of a good marriage, there is much to be learned about love (both human and Divine) and intimate sex in the chapters given to us. Author Sharon Jaynes writes, “God made sure the explicit picture of romance and sexual intimacy is in the Bible for a reason (. . .) It’s as if He’s saying, this is how it’s done.” God gives us a road map for intimacy in marriage in Song of Solomon, but many theologians agree He is also giving us a picture of Jesus’ love for His Bride, the Church. Author Natalia Kohn suggests, “Solomon, the bridegroom, is meant to symbolize the powerful love of our eternal bridegroom, Jesus Christ. The Shulamite woman, our protagonist, models passion and love for her lover, a fascination with who He is, and a hunger for more of His love.” God wants us to love Him deeply and passionately, the way He loves us. (Ephesians 3:18) In giving us a guide for how to love our spouses well, God is also showing us how to love Him with fervent hearts and deepest devotion.

2) Why does the Bible include these passages about sex and intimacy?
If you read the Bible cover to cover, you won’t find another book like Song of Solomon full of romance, eroticism, poetry, and spiritual significance. While other Bible books mention love, sex, and romance, none enter into as much depth of description and creativity found in the Song of Solomon. Why would God include this evocative book about love and sex in His Scripture? God’s primary intention for including this evocative book on love and sex was likely to teach us how to view His amazing gift of sexual intimacy for married couples. Pastor Chuck Swindoll notes, “The fullness of the union that takes place at marriage is described in some of the most splendid poetic language in the entire Bible. In a world where so many speak of God’s special gifts with coldly clinical or apathetic statistical language, the passion of Solomon’s poetry refreshes a world thirsty for the truth about marriage.”  Many believe that beyond the literal description of human love and intimacy, Song of Solomon provides a sense of how deeply Christ loves His bride, the church. Author David Guzik writes, “We find that this great song of songs illustrates the love, the intensity, and the beauty of relationship that should exist between God and the believer.” The bride responds to her Lover in Song of Solomon 7:10 by proclaiming, “I am my Love’s, and his desire is for me.” This phrase alone exemplifies how God loves us and created us for a holy union with Him, and how He longs for us to recognize and accept His great love. The Song of Solomon is God’s two-fold gift to His people, for it teaches us how to nurture sexual intimacy and how to relate to a God who loves us extravagantly.

3) What does it mean that the woman has treasured up every delicacy, old and new, for her love? (verse 13)
In Song of Solomon 7:13, the woman invites her lover to come away with her to the vineyards, telling him “The mandrakes give off a fragrance, and at our doors is every delicacy, both new and old. I have treasured them up for you, my love.” According to commentator David Guzik, “This difficult to translate phrase may have the sense that she is inviting him to enjoy intimacy in ways that are both familiar and new to the couple. The idea would be they would enjoy their lovemaking in creative ways that were planned in advance by the maiden.” Indeed, the mention of mandrakes would indicate a literal meaning of sexual intimacy, for, as commentator David M. Carr points out, “The mandrake or ‘love apple’ is a pungently fragrant plant long considered an aphrodisiac.” There are also arguments that the “old and new delicacies” of Song of Solomon 7:13 hold a spiritual significance. Author Tim Keller suggests, “Sex is for fully committed marriage relationships because it is to be a foretaste of the joy that comes from being in complete union with God. The most rapturous love between a man and woman is only a hint of God’s love for us.”  The Bible provides this surprising guide to sex and marriage in the Song of Solomon to help us build intimacy in marriage, but it also instructs us that God gave the gift of sex within marriage to remind us of God’s intense love and deep longing for a covenant relationship with His people.

Everyday Application

1) Who are the lovers featured in Song of Solomon 7:1-13?
In Song of Solomon 7:1-9, Solomon is describing the beauty of his wife. He starts at her feet and moves all the way up to the crown of her head, appreciating every last detail he beholds. Some of the metaphors describing her beauty are easily understood, while others are lost on a modern reader. However, the love, romance, sensuality, and passion in the text are evident to readers of all eras. The couple knows one another so intimately that she takes up the steamy description in Song of Solomon 7:9, finishing his sentence for him. She knows she has his heart, and her words of love and desire are equally as symbolic and erotic as his are. King Solomon seems to be utterly in love with his bride, and she with him. It is confounding to me, then, that Solomon could love so deeply and so well and yet have a harem of wives and concubines, as seen in Song of Solomon 6:8 and I Kings 11:3. Why would God choose King Solomon, this woefully imperfect man, to pen this beautiful book about intimacy in marriage? Author David Guzik suggests, “Perhaps the Song of Solomon does not reflect Solomon’s actual experience – certainly not in an enduring sense – but his wise analysis and skillful presentation of the glory of romantic and sensual love.” It is difficult for me to accept admonitions from someone who made as many mistakes as Solomon did, but I must remember that 2 Timothy 3:16-17 says “all Scripture is inspired by God and is profitable for teaching, for rebuking, for correcting, for training in righteousness, so that the man of God may be complete, equipped for every good work.” God inspired the words of King Solomon, so I know I can trust its message is perfect and true, even though the human author was far from perfect.

2) Why does the Bible include these passages about sex and intimacy?
The Bible contains instruction on how to be a better parent, how to manage finances, and how to treat other people, but looking to the Bible for instruction on sex and intimacy seems…uncomfortable. In fact, when a pastor says to open our Bibles to the Song of Solomon, people tend to squirm. Nobody wants to hear the preacher read, “Your breasts are like two fawns, twins of a gazelle” (Song of Solomon 7:3)! If, however, we move past our discomfort of discussing sex in the Bible, we discover much about marital intimacy from God’s perspective. When describing the lovers in Song of Solomon, author Duane Garrett suggests “They relish their pleasure in each other not only with physical action, but with carefully composed words. Love is, above all, a matter of the mind and heart and should be declared.” Song of Solomon teaches us that thoughtful communication is part of a successful intimate relationship. We also learn from this book that God created sex to be a joyous celebration of love. Author C.J. Mahaney suggests, “Solomon’s Song teaches us that lovemaking is intended by God to be an elaborate and pleasurable feast of the senses — a holy immersion in erotic joy.”  C.J. Mahaney also concludes that the lovers do not have sex just to fulfill physical desire. “They want to be together because they are in love, and the sex they enjoy with one another is an expression of that love.” God has given us the Song of Solomon to show us how to have a fulfilling marriage, but it can also point us to having a fulfilling relationship with Jesus. As author Iain Duguid notes, “A depiction of the best of all loves and the most wonderful of marriages will inevitably turn our hearts toward Christ, who has truly loved us and is the answer for our deep brokenness.” No human relationship, regardless of how intimate or rewarding, can bring healing and restoration to our hearts like knowing Christ can. (Psalm 147:3)  Those of us who have trusted Jesus as our personal Savior make up His church, which He calls His Bride. (2 Corinthians 11:2) He loves us with the devotion of the husband in the Song of Solomon, and he wants us to be His faithful and loving bride.

3) What does it mean that the woman has treasured up every delicacy, old and new, for her love? (verse 13)
A recent societal buzzword has been purposeful or intentional. It is interesting to note how the Shulamite woman in the Song of Solomon does exactly this. She invites her husband to steal away with her, “Come, my love, let’s go to the field; let’s spend the night among the henna blossoms.   Let’s go early to the vineyards; let’s see if the vine has budded, if the blossom has opened, if the pomegranates are in bloom. There I will give you my caresses. The mandrakes give off a fragrance, and at our doors is every delicacy, both new and old. I have treasured them up for you, my love.” (Song of Solomon 7:11-13) She plans and initiates an intimate time with her husband on purpose. She chooses a romantic place and assures him she has treasured up delicacies, both old and new, for them to share. He has been pursuing her, saying, “Your head crowns you like Mount Carmel, the hair of your head like purple cloth—a king could be held captive in your tresses. How beautiful you are and how pleasant, my love, with such delights!” (Song of Solomon 7:5-6) The couple intentionally nurtures their unity and passion. Author Sharon Jaynes argues, “The Shulamite was a wise woman who took deliberate action to make her marriage sing with intimacy that was purposeful and playful. I envision her sauntering up to her husband as he’s overseeing the fields. She whispers in his ear, and her warm breath teases his neck. Tempting him. Flirting with him still. . . And God whispers to us through her words, this is one of the secrets to lifelong love. Pull away. Be intentional. Leave nothing to chance.” Many marriages start off with both partners making time for each other, but stressors and responsibilities dim the passion and purposefulness that once nourished intimacy. We would do well to heed the deliberate acts of the Shulamite woman. Their intimacy was worthy of their sacrifice in other areas. We all have responsibilities that need our attention, but none as important as our marriage relationship. Strong marriages can point others to the love of Christ! Let’s purpose to put our marriages ahead of other priorities.

What do YOU think?! Share Here!
Missing the connection to our other Journey Study?
Catch up with Intimacy!

Digging Deeper is for Everyone!

1) Take this passage (or any other passage).
2) Read it, and the verses around it,
several times
3) Write down your questions
as you think of them.
4) Ask specific culture related questions and be ready to dig around for your answers. Google them, use www.studylight.org, or look them up in a study Bible and read the footnotes (click on the little letters next to a word and it will show you
other related verses!). (www.esvbible.org)
5) Check your applications with other trusted Christians that you are in community with and embrace the fullness of God
in your everyday!

Digging Deeper Community

Share What You’ve Learned!
Pray Together!
Join us in the GT Facebook Community!

Our Current Study Theme!

This is Beloved Week Two!
Don’t miss out on the discussion!
Sign up to receive every GT Journey Study!

Why Dig Deeper?

Finding the original meaning is a huge deal when we study Scripture and can make all the difference in our understanding as we apply God’s truths to our everyday lives.

In our modern-day relationships, we want people to understand our original intention as we communicate; how much more so between God and humanity?!

Here’s a little bit more on why we take Digging Deeper so seriously.

Study Tools

We love getting help while we study and www.studylight.org is one of many excellent resources, providing the original Hebrew (Old Testament) or Greek (New Testament) with an English translation.

Want to know more about a specific word in a verse? Click on “Strong’s Interlinear Bible” then click the word you’d like to study. Discover “origin”, “definition” and hear the original pronunciation – That Is Awesome!

Want more background? Click “Study Tools”, then pick a few commentaries to read their scholarly approach, keeping in mind that just because a commentary says it, doesn’t mean it’s true. (just like the internet :-))

Memorize It!

Download this week’s verse and make it your phone’s lockscreen!
Tap and hold on your mobile device to save.

Beloved Day 8 Intimacy

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Read His Words Before Ours!

Song of Solomon 4:1-7
Song of Solomon 7:1-13
Proverbs 5:15-23
Ecclesiastes 9:7-10
John 14:8-11

Beloved, Day 8

Intimacy.

There’s no other way of saying it: sexual intimacy within marriage is a gift hand-crafted by our incredible Creator God for the people He made in His image.

Throughout the Bible, there are countless examples of God’s created beings enjoying and participating in the gift of physical union. Early in Genesis, the Lord affirms the goodness of sex for the purpose of procreation. (Genesis 1:28) Just a little later in Genesis, we see Isaac comforted in his grief by physical union with Rebekah, which affirms the great comfort of sex in times of grief and loss. (Genesis 24:61-67) In Proverbs, Scripture also asserts sex for the purpose of physical pleasure and enjoyment is good. (Proverbs 5:15-23)

The entire book of the Song of Solomon extols the heady pleasures of physical desire and fulfillment found in the physical act of sex. Vivid descriptions, expressions of love, and honest dialogue about the emotional and physical experiences which accompany physical intimacy were poured over, examined, tested, and ultimately included in the canon of Scripture for a specific purpose. God gave us sex, and sex within the context of marriage between a man and a woman is a good, good thing.

Song of Solomon is a depiction of the literal joys of physical intimacy, but there are some traits we see exemplified in the two young lovers which warrant further exploration in the context of our own marriages.

They are transparent.
The two young lovers are obviously desirous for each other, but they are also completely transparent with others about the one to whom their thoughts, emotions and desires are drawn. They aren’t hiding the way they feel about their beloved; they are practically shouting it from the rooftops. There is no mistaking how they feel, what they want, and to whom their heart belongs.

They are honest with each other.
There’s no question the two are each in pursuit of the other. There is no sub-text and no veiled references. Neither is playing “hard to get.” There’s no competition, no game, no “prove your love to me.” They are each completely, totally, all in.

They are vulnerable.
Nothing is too intimate to share. No expression too outlandish, no description too flowery. There’s no thought of looking foolish, or saying something silly. Each feels completely safe with the other, and as a result they are unashamed to share their thoughts, emotions and desires.

They are purposeful.
They are willing to do practically anything to steal away for an encounter with the one they love. They talk of slipping away to a vineyard, to a quiet room, to his chambers. They are not embarrassed to say exactly what they want, and their actions support their words.

For a moment, let’s set aside all our expectations of our spouse and take a look at where we are.

Beloved, when we examine how we operate in the context of our own marriage, can we say the same? Are we transparent with our spouses? Do we create space for them to be transparent in return, without fear of us shutting down or refusing to respond? Are we honest? And if we aren’t “all in,” is that an area we need to confess to our Father and allow Him to touch? Are we vulnerable in sharing the intimate spaces of our bodies, yes, but even more importantly, our hearts and minds? Are we purposeful in our marriage? Do we choose to pursue our spouse every day, even when we don’t feel like it?

Let’s take it a step further. Are those traits present in our relationship with our Father? Are we transparent about the condition of our hearts and lives with the One Who holds the power to change us? Are we honest with Him about our thoughts and feelings? Do we surrender them to Him? Do we allow ourselves to be open and soft to His conviction, to His healing? And do we pursue radical intimacy with the God Who is with us? Do we consistently prioritize placing ourselves before Him, in all our humanity?

These are hard questions, aren’t they? I can’t say yes to all of them. 

Maybe you can’t, either.

So what do we do from here? Where do we go from this place of knowing we aren’t where we’d like to be, and recognizing we can’t move forward on our own?

We start with confessing where we’ve been, where we are, and where we’d like to be to our Bridegroom King. We acknowledge our definition of intimacy falls woefully short of the intimacy He designed for us to experience with Him, and we ask Him to show us the way. He alone is the Author of intimacy; we can trust Him to lead us into the fullness of all He created!

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Beloved Day 7 A Lover’s Delight: Digging Deeper

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Digging Deeper Days

Finding the original intent of Scripture and making good application to our everyday lives as we become equipped to correctly handle the Word of Truth!

Yesterday’s Journey Study connects with today’s!
Check out A Lover’s Delight!

The Questions

1) What is the setting of this passage and why should we believe it is more than allegorical?

2) Why does Solomon refer to his bride as his sister? (verse 12)

3) What is the meaning of the garden in these verses?

Song of Solomon 4:12-16

My sister, my bride, you are a locked garden—a locked garden and a sealed spring. 13 Your branches are a paradise of pomegranates with choicest fruits; henna with nard,14 nard and saffron, calamus and cinnamon, with all the trees of frankincense, myrrh and aloes, with all the best spices. 15 You are a garden spring, a well of flowing water streaming from Lebanon.

16 Awaken, north wind; come, south wind. Blow on my garden, and spread the fragrance of its spices. Let my love come to his garden and eat its choicest fruits.

Original Intent

1) What is the setting of this passage and why should we believe it is more than allegorical?
An allegory is defined as a “a story, poem, or picture that uses symbolism to reveal a hidden meaning of a deeper moral or spiritual truth.” Although there are several Bible commentators (many from the Puritan era of history) who believe this book is allegory, it is best interpreted as a poetic, but powerful description of the deeply romantic and sensual love between a husband and his wife. The structure and setting of the book do not provide a chronological story, but instead give the reader “snapshots” of a couple’s pre-marital and marital relationship. (enduringword.com) It is true that God uses marriage as a gospel illustration of the relationship between Christ and the Church (Ephesians 5:22-32), but it seems apparent to most Bible scholars that the literal meaning should be the primary way the book is interpreted. The straightforward way in which Chapter 4 contains specific details of the sexual love demonstrated by a husband and a wife reveals the beauty of sexual intimacy in Christian marriage. It seems unnecessary to allegorize these passages that present a marital love consistent with Scripture’s other teachings about marriage and sex.

2) Why does Solomon refer to his bride as his sister? (verse 12)
Solomon uses the term “sister” three more times in his book in addition to verse 12. (4:9-10 and 5:1) No conservative Bible commentators believe this is a reference to him marrying his biological sister, and no scriptural evidence provides reason assume familial relations. “Sister” was a common expression in the Hebrew language of familiarity and closeness. As in many cultures, Egyptian love songs included lyrics which call one another ‘brother’ and ‘sister’. Years later, Solomon is using familiar language drawn from then-modern-day poetry. Theologian Charles Spurgeon writes, “‘My sister’ – that is, one by birth, partaker of the same (human) nature. ‘My spouse’ – that is, one in love, joined by sacred ties of affection that never can be snapped. ‘My sister’ by birth, ‘My spouse’ by choice. ‘My sister’ in communion, ‘My spouse’ in absolute union with myself.” By referring to his bride as his sister, Solomon was showing her double honor. He loved her with the physical desire of a spouse and with the natural love of a sibling. It is significant to understand the deep affection Solomon had for his bride, and how he demonstrated that to her.

3) What is the meaning of the garden in these verses?
Bible teachers and commentators who take the book literally, not allegorically, believe this “locked garden” represents a sort of separation and privacy regarding the bride herself. This likely refers to her being a virgin on her wedding night. (enduringword.com) As he has done previously, Solomon expresses his admiration for her. Specifically, he is enthralled with her beauty and purity that reminds him of the “choicest fruits and best spices”. (verses 13-14) As his bride, the fact that she had remained sexually pure was deeply attractive to him. Her sexuality was sacred, and as husband and wife, they both recognize this. The Bride both acknowledges her virginity and agrees it is right for him to find pleasure in knowing that. (verse 16) We see a beautiful picture of the bride’s trust in her new husband. She is freely and gladly unlocking herself to him, inviting him into this sacred act of sexual intimacy. As we dig deep into the meaning of these verses, it may appear they are infringing on moments that should be kept between a married couple. This may be the hesitancy among bible scholars to see them as literal. But an honest study of the book renders it difficult to interpret this as anything but a biblical and literal picture of godly love and passion that honors both spouses and God, the creator of sexual intimacy.

Everyday Application

1) What is the setting of this passage and why should we believe it is more than allegorical?
In considering how we apply these verses, I am enlisting Pastor David Guzik’s help. His sermon on chapter 4 is so well stated, I can’t improve on it, “When you think of the many crude terms that men use to refer to women’s body parts, isn’t there something so beautiful and powerful in this poetic, intimate, and dignified way of expressing love. It is a celebration of the strength and purity and goodness of marital love. There’s nothing insecure here … or dirty … or crass about it. There is simply nothing like this in ancient literature.” So, friends, we can celebrate this love story. As women who desire to live with a godly, biblical perspective regarding purity, we need not back away from the passion we read in the Song of Solomon. The poetry in these passages should be seen as sincere devotion and deep affection between man and wife. We can approach this book with the reverence it deserves, and with an understanding of the high value God places on intimate passion in marriage.

2) Why does Solomon refer to his bride as his sister? (verse 12)
There is an interesting parallel in Song of Solomon 8:1 where the bride says to her lover, “If only I could treat you like my brother, one who nursed at my mother’s breast, I would find you in public and kiss you, and no one would scorn me.” This sweet bride craves the freedom to publicly convey her love for her husband. In that day, outward expressions of affection were considered distasteful except for close kin. She wishes for the same opportunity to show her love to her husband as she would to her own brother. Today, there are jokes and memes about PDA (public displays of affection). Sadly, we have become shameless as a society as we have left behind honor for our bodies and brought every lewd display into the public eye. As wives, we would do our marriages a favor by praying for a desire toward our husbands that is appropriately expressed in public. One of the most beautiful displays I see that almost always brings me to tears, is a couple well into their later years, walking along arm in arm or holding hands tightly. Oh, sweet married friends, let’s show our spouses double honor with physical and natural love!

3) What is the meaning of the garden in these verses?
The literal reading of Song of Solomon may be difficult for some women. Maybe you feel it’s an intrusion on what should be a sacred trust between a married couple. Women who strive for holiness are encouraged by the church to be pure and modest in our dress and demeanor. Reading such an explicit passage could possibly leave someone feeling exposed or embarrassed. Sisters, I get it! I have often wondered why God would include in His inspired Word such an intimate exchange between a man and his bride for all to read. If not understood correctly, it may seem that God is advocating for women to be viewed as objects to be displayed like a trophy. Or maybe you are feeling shame because you did not enter marriage as a virgin, and you wonder if your husband can ever see you in the way described in this passage. I plead with you, dear married friend, to keep praying and digging into the difficult passages and find the joy. Pray to the good and gracious Father who desires to reveal to you the garden of God-ordained sexual fulfillment. Allow the Spirit of God to inspire and equip you to experience the holy intimacy He desires in your marriage.

What do YOU think?! Share Here!
Missing the connection to our other Journey Study?
Catch up with A Lover’s Delight!

Digging Deeper is for Everyone!

1) Take this passage (or any other passage).
2) Read it, and the verses around it,
several times
3) Write down your questions
as you think of them.
4) Ask specific culture related questions and be ready to dig around for your answers. Google them, use www.studylight.org, or look them up in a study Bible and read the footnotes (click on the little letters next to a word and it will show you
other related verses!). (www.esvbible.org)
5) Check your applications with other trusted Christians that you are in community with and embrace the fullness of God
in your everyday!

Digging Deeper Community

Share What You’ve Learned!
Pray Together!
Join us in the GT Facebook Community!

Our Current Study Theme!

This is Beloved Week Two!
Don’t miss out on the discussion!
Sign up to receive every GT Journey Study!

Why Dig Deeper?

Finding the original meaning is a huge deal when we study Scripture and can make all the difference in our understanding as we apply God’s truths to our everyday lives.

In our modern-day relationships, we want people to understand our original intention as we communicate; how much more so between God and humanity?!

Here’s a little bit more on why we take Digging Deeper so seriously.

Study Tools

We love getting help while we study and www.studylight.org is one of many excellent resources, providing the original Hebrew (Old Testament) or Greek (New Testament) with an English translation.

Want to know more about a specific word in a verse? Click on “Strong’s Interlinear Bible” then click the word you’d like to study. Discover “origin”, “definition” and hear the original pronunciation – That Is Awesome!

Want more background? Click “Study Tools”, then pick a few commentaries to read their scholarly approach, keeping in mind that just because a commentary says it, doesn’t mean it’s true. (just like the internet :-))

Memorize It!

Download this week’s verse and make it your phone’s lockscreen!
Tap and hold on your mobile device to save.

The GT Weekend! ~ Beloved Week 1

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The GT Weekend!

At Gracefully Truthful, weekends aren’t for “checking out”.
Use this time to invite the Almighty’s fullness into you life in a deeper way!
Saturdays and Sundays are a chance to
reflect, rest, and re-center our lives onto Christ.
Don’t miss the opportunity to connect with other women in prayer,
rest your soul in reflective journaling,
and spend time worshiping the Creator who
longs for intimacy with each of us!

Worship Through Journaling

Worship Through Journaling

1) Our Journey from Monday closes with the challenge, “Regardless of your marital status, draw close to the Lord and risk being unmasked before Him. The love, passion, and connection experienced there is well worth the being seen.” As a single woman, I often longed for a husband with whom I could share my deepest longings and my truest self. As a married woman, I have encountered the truth of a broken world that no human relationship is perfect. While my husband and I have a secure relationship, we still need to work to be vulnerable and open with one another. Marriage will not, and cannot, solve all our problems. Sit down this week and have an honest conversation with the Lord. Read 2 Corinthians 3 again and consider what it would look like for you to approach the presence of God with an “unveiled face.” Beloved, the Father knows your weaknesses. Do not be ashamed to approach Him and ask for His favor. He is delighted to be with you; delight in His presence. To take it a step further, consider sharing with your spouse or a close friend what you are learning from God, either in this area or another area of growth. As you connect with others, you are helping one another grow in intimacy with the Lord!

2) Sarah attests that our God-crafted differences give us cause to celebrate rather than be divisive in our closest relationships. Can you imagine how beautiful our marriages, and relationships with other believers would be, if we saw each role as uniquely crafted and desperately needed? The imagery God uses of a head and body give us a picture of oneness. The head cannot be separated from the body and still function, and the same is true for the body. How can you intentionally celebrate your spouse’s differences this week? Often, the longer we are married, those idiosyncrasies that annoy us most give us insight into how God created our spouse as wonderfully different than ourselves. Instead of jumping to frustration, and our own perspective this weekend, celebrate how God made your husband different! Whether you’re single or married, learning to assess your own uniqueness, while allowing another person to be different without detracting from you is a huge milestone in relational maturity! Take time this week to encourage the differences you see in the people who are closest to you, and praise God His creativity in crafting us as unique beings.

3) The woman in Song of Solomon adamantly pursues her lover until she finds him.  She does not waiver in her pursuit, and she is rewarded with love and acceptance when she finds him. The world tells us that to get love, we have to play “hard to get,” but this is a power play aimed at manipulation and gaining an upper hand. In God’s kingdom, we are called to lay down our power and be authentic with one another. We all long to be pursued, but are we willing to take the steps toward pursing another? Wives, where are you struggling in your marriage? What are some steps you can take to pursue your husband and rekindle intimacy? Where do you need God’s healing hand to cover your marriage and enable you and your husband to reconnect? Write a prayer asking God for His help, understanding that there is no topic that is off-limits to God. He knows your desires and He knows where you need help. Single sisters, are you pursing God as your highest good? Are you pursing deep friendships with other women in your circle? Are you practicing authentic intimacy with the people God has placed in your life? Write some ways that you can faithfully serve and pursue God in your singleness and commit to practicing those steps.

Praying Scripture back to the One who wrote it in the first place is a great way to jump start our prayer-life! Pray this passage from 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 back to the Lord and
let His Spirit speak to you through it!

Love is patient, love is kind. Love does not envy, is not boastful, is not arrogant, is not rude, is not self-seeking, is not irritable, and does not keep a record of wrongs. Love finds no joy in unrighteousness but rejoices in the truth. It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.

Prayer Journal
“Let us enter His presence with thanksgiving; let us shout triumphantly to Him in song.” (Psalm 95:2). Lord, You are so good to us! You have made a way for Your children to enter into your presence, to have real and intimate relationship with You, and to have deep relationships with others. I confess I have hidden myself from You. Like Adam in the garden, I have attempted to hide my sin in my shame. As I hide from You, I hide from the people I love the most, shunning your gift of grace and pushing away those who love me. I have not pursued intimate relationships with the dedication and faithfulness You have freed me to experience. Thank You that I do not need to live in shame! Thank You for making a way for us to be reconciled to You and one another. Help me live with an unveiled face before You. Help me to pursue and build intimate and life-giving relationships with others. Empower my relationships to reflect the unity and oneness befitting children of the Most High God. You said the world around us would know Your people by their love for one another. (John 13:35) Help me to live my life honoring You and showing others Your great love.

Worship Through Community

Can we pray for you? Reach Out! We’d love to pray for and with you!
Send us an email at prayer@gracefullytruthful.com

Build community, be transparent, and encourage others:
Share how God spoke to you today!
Comment Here or in our Facebook Community Group!

Worship Through Prayer

Worship Through Music

Beloved Day 5 Beloved’s Pursuit

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Read His Words Before Ours!

Song of Solomon 3:1-5
Proverbs 15:3-10
1 Timothy 6:6-14
Philippians 1:25-30
Ephesians 5:22-33

Beloved, day 5

Pursuit.

The mere word evokes images of a hunt, doesn’t it? It brings to mind words like… desiring, chasing, overtaking, capturing, conquering. 

There’s a reason such great emphasis is placed on “playing hard to get” in current culture. The human race has placed immense value on being the individual who is sought after, regardless of the situation or relationship dynamic. Whether we are interviewing for a new job, foraying into a new friendship, floating a corporate merger, or attempting to infuse “life” into our marriage, we have bought into the belief that the individual who is not easy to “win” holds a loftier, more powerful status.

But what if that narrative doesn’t exactly line up with what our Father shows us?

Song of Solomon is a beautiful portrayal of the joy, desire, and intimacy God has given the human race in the form of sex. We witness the intense desire, breathless longing, and yes, pursuit, of each party, laced across every page of the book. Physical pleasure aside, what do we see here?

I see a woman who longed for intimacy with her lover, but she didn’t merely pine away for him; she pursued him. She roamed city streets, looking for her love. She asked passing guards if they had seen him. When they told her they hadn’t, she kept looking. She didn’t give up until she’d found him. 

And when she found him, she did not let go.

The words are stirring, because we each long to be pursued like that, don’t we? We long to be so passionately pursued, so sought after, so desired, so wanted.

Before marriage, pursuit is mainly surface-deep. We show our beloved we are interested in all kinds of little ways. We learn more about the things they are interested in. We communicate many times, each day. Sometimes we choose clothing, or makeup, or jewelry, or hairstyles we know are appealing to them. We pursue their interests and desires, and in that pursuit, we assist them in pursuing us.

When we enter into marriage, the dynamic shifts. The “newness” begins to fade, and it’s easy for us to believe the pursuit actually ended with marriage.

Beloved, this isn’t so! Throughout the New Testament, marriage is repeatedly held up as the embodiment of Christ and His Church. Husbands and wives are exhorted to mirror Christ in the way we love one another. To submit to each other in love, not so one can lord their power over the other, rather, in this loving deference, Christ alone is glorified.

But what does this look like, five, ten, fifty years in? What does it look like beyond spontaneous romantic encounters and flowers for no reason?

Sometimes, it looks like waking up early to make him coffee.
Sometimes, it looks like showing up for his parents in their time of need.
Sometimes, it looks like slipping a hand in his when his voice wavers.
Sometimes, it looks like reminding him who he is when it seems he’s forgotten.
Sometimes, it looks like going to marriage counseling.
Sometimes, it looks like driving him to every treatment.
Sometimes, it looks like being silent when you want to scream.
Sometimes, it looks like recounting all the times the Lord has seen you both through, when it feels like all is lost.
Sometimes, it looks like following him down a dark road you never expected, taking him by the hand, and walking back into the light together.

Sometimes, it looks like staying when you want to leave.

Beloved, how many times has your Shepherd Bridegroom carried you back when you’ve wandered far? Has He found you, when you’ve tangled yourself in all the places you never belonged? Has His voice been gentle as He quieted your fears and brought you back to His fold?

He invites us to love our husbands this way, too. To pursue them, gently, completely, guilelessly.

Marriage is not an end to an exciting pursuit; it’s an open invitation into the lifelong adventure in the pursuit of our lover, and to being pursued in return!

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Embracing God’s fullness in our lives is rooted in scripture and memorizing His word is vital to our continued growth and depth with Jesus. Tap and hold from your mobile device to download this week’s verse and make it your phone’s lockscreen!

Thanks for joining us today as we journeyed into Beloved Week One! Don’t miss out on the discussion below – we’d love to hear your thoughts!
Click the above image for today’s Digging Deeper!

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Here’s a link to all past studies in Beloved!

Beloved Day 4 Radical Love Of Marriage: Digging Deeper

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Digging Deeper Days

Finding the original intent of Scripture and making good application to our everyday lives as we become equipped to correctly handle the Word of Truth!

Yesterday’s Journey Study connects with today’s!
Check out Radical Love Of Marriage!

The Questions

1) What does the woman singer mean by “set me as a seal on your heart and your arm”? How does this relate to the strength of love? (verses 6-7)

2) What is implied with the language of walls and towers in verses 8-11?

3) What makes this shared love so radical, wild, and free?

Song of Solomon 8:5-14

5 Who is this coming up from the wilderness,
leaning on the one she loves?

Woman
I awakened you under the apricot tree.
There your mother conceived you;
there she conceived and gave you birth.
6 Set me as a seal on your heart,
as a seal on your arm.
For love is as strong as death;
jealousy is as unrelenting as Sheol.
Love’s flames are fiery flames—
an almighty flame!
7 A huge torrent cannot extinguish love;
rivers cannot sweep it away.
If a man were to give all his wealth for love,
it would be utterly scorned.

Chorus
8 Our sister is young;
she has no breasts.
What will we do for our sister
on the day she is spoken for?
9 If she is a wall,
we will build a silver barricade on her.
If she is a door,
we will enclose her with cedar planks.

Woman
10 I am a wall
and my breasts like towers.
So to him I have become
like one who finds peace.

11 Solomon owned a vineyard in Baal-hamon.
He leased the vineyard to tenants.
Each was to bring for his fruit
one thousand pieces of silver.
12 I have my own vineyard.
The one thousand are for you, Solomon,
but two hundred for those who take care of its fruits.

Man
13 You who dwell in the gardens,
companions are listening for your voice;
let me hear you!

Woman
14 Run away with me, my love,
and be like a gazelle
or a young stag
on the mountains of spices.

Original Intent

1) What does the woman singer mean by “set me as a seal on your heart and your arm”? How does this relate to the strength of love? (verses 6-7)
Solomon spends his entire poetic song declaring and describing the fantastic love between a husband and wife that is unlike any other love relationship. Verses 6-7 speak specifically to the radical commitment strength of marital love that is also not found in other relationships. The word translated “seal” from Hebrew is used multiple times in the Old Testament. When we look up other instances of any word used in Scripture, it helps us gain helpful insight for how the original author intended the word to be defined in their writing context. “Seal” is most often used in connection with a ruler’s “signet ring” like in 1 Kings 21:8. Soft clay was placed over the opening of a scroll containing an important edict or message from the king, then he would press his royal ring into the soft clay. A king’s seal was recognized throughout his land and declared that no one could repeal what he had declared. A king’s seal was the undisputed and irrevocable “final word”. Uniquely, Solomon wrote that the Bride herself was the husband’s “signet ring”. Her living self was the promise of love that would not be defeated and her invitation to her Lover to “set me as (your) seal” is the hope of a covenant love that will be irreversible.

2) What is implied with the language of walls and towers in verses 8-11?
In the ancient culture when Solomon wrote his poetic song, virginity was highly valued. In fact, you couldn’t be honorably married if you weren’t a virgin. The chorus singers in verses 8-10 are poetically speaking of a young woman who isn’t yet of age to be married or carry children. The young girl depicted as a “wall” and then a “door” symbolizes her virginity protecting her (like a wall or door would protect a house) for a one-day-coming marriage. As a community, they sing “we will build a silver barricade on her (wall)” and again using the door illustration, “we will enclose her with cedar planks.” Together, the community agreed to honor God’s design for marriage and together lovingly protect the young girl and her virginity until it was time to give the gift of sex to her husband. Given the type of material described for poetically protecting the girl, we get the idea the community was acting in tender love, not a hardened fist of legislature. Instead of “iron”, the community sings of “cedar planks” and “silver”. In verse 11, the Beloved Wife sings that she herself is her own wall and instead of her body needing safeguarding for a future husband, her breasts are her own “watch towers” and she has found peace in the giving of sexual love to her husband.

3) What makes this shared love so radical, wild, and free?
To our ears, it sounds pretty far from romantic for a wife to say to her husband, “be like a gazelle
or a young stag on the mountains of spices” (verse 14) To the listening audience of this ancient culture, however, both a gazelle and a young stag depicted beauty, vigor, and grace, so we get the picture of a handsome and strong, yet gentle Lover. Equally as strange to us is the idea of “a mountain of spices” and we shrug our shoulders and move past the weird imagery. Solomon actually didn’t have huge piles of cinnamon in mind when he penned these words. Rather, “mountains” were used earlier in the song to describe the woman’s two breasts. (Song of Solomon 4:5-6) Also earlier in the book, spices carried the idea of delightful sexual intercourse where the “spices” were associated with sexual arousal and pleasure. (Song of Solomon 1:12, 5:1, 5) Understanding how these images were first understood gives us a very different perspective on this love poem! Earlier in the song, before the two consummate their marriage vows, the Lover husband looks forward to “going away” with his Beloved to make love and enjoy each other. (Song of Solomon 4:8) Here, at the close of the song, the relationship has deepened inside the sacred space of marriage and the wife, now free to love her husband sexually, owns this capacity to the full and finds pleasure in inviting him to run away with her and enjoy their love together. In God’s view of marriage, the relationship between spouses is meant to flourish and grow deeper over time, allowing for ever-greater exchange of intimacy.

Everyday Application

1) What does the woman singer mean by “set me as a seal on your heart and your arm”? How does this relate to the strength of love? (verses 6-7)
While much of Song of Solomon seems to our western eyes and ears to be based on merely feelings of heightened sexual love, these verses shout a bold contradiction. The love shared between Lover and Beloved was enduring, not based on feelings or circumstance. The strength of their love was not found in emotion, but in a covenant seal that could not reversed. While humans experience the sensation described as “falling in, or out, of love”, Solomon’s song affirms a far deeper, much more radical commitment. Beautifully, this type of human love relationship is intended by the Lord to reflect the love He has for us, as His very own chosen Bride. Jesus gave us His living self as the single greatest display of covenant love when He chose to take on our consequence for our sin at the cross. Here, He willingly laid down His life to make us His Bride, washing us in His forgiveness. (Ephesians 5:25-27) Marriage between a husband and wife is meant, by design, to last for as long as either partner lives. If you’re married, stand firm in your marriage covenant relationship. If you’re divorced or single, be reminded that the Lord Himself will never break His covenant love with and for you. As is sung throughout Scripture, His love endures forever! (Psalm 136) If you’re in a marriage relationship where you or your children are experiencing abuse or abandonment, we urge you to please seek safety and wise, Christian counseling. God’s design for marriage is beautiful, and He continues working out His incredible plan through broken, imperfect, and sinful people, but God has never intended marriage to be a place where one spouse is ruled, controlled, or abused by the other spouse. If this describes your marriage, or that of a friend’s, please seek help and know that there is no condemnation for doing so!

2) What is implied with the language of walls and towers in verses 8-11?
Far from teaching “safe sex” practices, the community in Solomon’s day took it upon themselves to together fight for God’s design for sex and marriage. As women, we are very uniquely positioned to link arms together and do the same by championing the sacredness of sex and marriage for the coming generation. Whether you have daughters yourself or maybe you serve with a youth ministry at your church, talk with young girls openly about sex and how amazingly beautiful both sex and their bodies are. Talk about how God handcrafted this gift of intimacy to be explicitly shared between a husband and wife. While it will likely feel awkward for you to begin these conversations, be encouraged that the young girl in your life is indeed listening. When we decide together as Jesus-loving women to honor sex and marriage as a model for younger girls, we are living out biblical community in radical ways!

3) What makes this shared love so radical, wild, and free?
God’s design for sex and marriage is far from boring; it’s radical. It requires a willingness to trust Him and His plan over ours, love our spouse unconditionally, and find delight in a monogamous sexual relationship. Here in this sacred place, the best experiences of both sex and marriage are discovered and enjoyed! If you’re married, consider writing a love poem to your spouse, or even just making a list of things you enjoy about him. Nothing is off limits here as this is shared between, God, your man, and you. Include character traits you admire, moments that have made you feel close to him, and, of course, be creative and include physical attributes you enjoy and why! I’m guessing you will both enjoy the process! I have the high honor of knowing several vibrant, Jesus-loving single women. They have shown me much about Jesus and His love in ways I never would have discovered on my own. If you’re single, whether by divorce or not, be encouraged that your intentional time developing intimacy with the God of the Universe, and knowing yourself, are gifts to the Church. Yes, girl, the Church. Share what the Father is uniquely teaching you through your relationship with Him as you come alongside your married friends. Jesus’ Bride, the Church, needs all of us. Certainly not just married folks. I know this will feel bold and daring to many, but regardless of whether you’re married or single, this challenge is for all of us. Make space for a few evenings to write down the attributes about your own body that you enjoy. This isn’t a place for criticism and there is absolutely no judgment. What you write is for you and God to share in a sacred space. He crafted your body and wants you to celebrate in it!

What do YOU think?! Share Here!
Missing the connection to our other Journey Study?
Catch up with Radical Love Of Marriage!

Digging Deeper is for Everyone!

1) Take this passage (or any other passage).
2) Read it, and the verses around it,
several times
3) Write down your questions
as you think of them.
4) Ask specific culture related questions and be ready to dig around for your answers. Google them, use www.studylight.org, or look them up in a study Bible and read the footnotes (click on the little letters next to a word and it will show you
other related verses!). (www.esvbible.org)
5) Check your applications with other trusted Christians that you are in community with and embrace the fullness of God
in your everyday!

Digging Deeper Community

Share What You’ve Learned!
Pray Together!
Join us in the GT Facebook Community!

Our Current Study Theme!

This is Beloved Week One!
Don’t miss out on the discussion!
Sign up to receive every GT Journey Study!

Why Dig Deeper?

Finding the original meaning is a huge deal when we study Scripture and can make all the difference in our understanding as we apply God’s truths to our everyday lives.

In our modern-day relationships, we want people to understand our original intention as we communicate; how much more so between God and humanity?!

Here’s a little bit more on why we take Digging Deeper so seriously.

Study Tools

We love getting help while we study and www.studylight.org is one of many excellent resources, providing the original Hebrew (Old Testament) or Greek (New Testament) with an English translation.

Want to know more about a specific word in a verse? Click on “Strong’s Interlinear Bible” then click the word you’d like to study. Discover “origin”, “definition” and hear the original pronunciation – That Is Awesome!

Want more background? Click “Study Tools”, then pick a few commentaries to read their scholarly approach, keeping in mind that just because a commentary says it, doesn’t mean it’s true. (just like the internet :-))

Memorize It!

Download this week’s verse and make it your phone’s lockscreen!
Tap and hold on your mobile device to save.

Beloved Day 2 Unveiled Faces: Digging Deeper

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Digging Deeper Days

Finding the original intent of Scripture and making good application to our everyday lives as we become equipped to correctly handle the Word of Truth!

Yesterday’s Journey Study connects with today’s!
Check out Unveiled Faces!

The Questions

1) What is the meaning of using fruits, flowers, and animals to describe this man and wife love relationship? 

2) What is the purpose of the warning to the young women of Jerusalem? (verse 7)

3) How does Scripture connect a human marriage to a relationship between God and us?

Song of Solomon 2:1-17

Woman
I am a wildflower of Sharon,
a lily of the valleys.

Man
2 Like a lily among thorns,
so is my darling among the young women.

Woman
3 Like an apricot tree among the trees of the forest,
so is my love among the young men.
I delight to sit in his shade,
and his fruit is sweet to my taste.
4 He brought me to the banquet hall,
and he looked on me with love.
5 Sustain me with raisins;
refresh me with apricots,
for I am lovesick.
6 May his left hand be under my head,
and his right arm embrace me.
7 Young women of Jerusalem, I charge you
by the gazelles and the wild does of the field,
do not stir up or awaken love
until the appropriate time.
8 Listen! My love is approaching.
Look! Here he comes,
leaping over the mountains,
bounding over the hills.
9 My love is like a gazelle
or a young stag.
See, he is standing behind our wall,
gazing through the windows,
peering through the lattice.
10 My love calls to me:

Man
Arise, my darling.
Come away, my beautiful one.
11 For now the winter is past;
the rain has ended and gone away.
12 The blossoms appear in the countryside.
The time of singing has come,
and the turtledove’s cooing is heard in our land.
13 The fig tree ripens its figs;
the blossoming vines give off their fragrance.
Arise, my darling.
Come away, my beautiful one.
14 My dove, in the clefts of the rock,
in the crevices of the cliff,
let me see your face,
let me hear your voice;
for your voice is sweet,
and your face is lovely.


Woman
15 Catch the foxes for us—
the little foxes that ruin the vineyards—
for our vineyards are in bloom.
16 My love is mine and I am his;
he feeds among the lilies.
17 Until the day breaks
and the shadows flee,
turn around, my love, and be like a gazelle
or a young stag on the divided mountains.

Original Intent

1) What is the meaning of using fruits, flowers, and animals to describe this man and wife love relationship?
Song of Songs suggests it is the greatest of all songs and found within its pages are lyrical poetry arranged as dialogue between a woman and her lover. While scholars maintain that the love story makes allegorical connections between God and His love for mankind, Song of Solomon is also, undeniably, a sensuous book reveling in God’s good gifts of intimacy within marriage. To properly understand this poetic song, we must remember to set our minds on the then-current time and culture. The Shulamite Bride compares herself to a wildflower of Sharon and a lily of the valley, both of which were common. The “Sharon” was a fertile plain between Mount Carmel and Joppa along the coast of the Mediterranean Sea producing beautiful wildflowers in abundance. Likewise, the lily was plentiful in Palestine. By saying of herself, “I am a wildflower of Sharon, a lily of the valleys”, she is not speaking in arrogance, but rather that, while she is beautiful, she is also common. (verse 1) Solomon picks up on her imagery of flowers, but responds by pronouncing, “Like a lily among thorns, so is my darling among the young women.” (verse 2) He sets her apart from all other young women, describing everyone else as “thorns” in comparison. The Lover extols her beauty for she was not at all common in his eyes. In similar fashion, the woman uses the imagery of an apricot tree to depict her lover. “Like an apricot tree among the trees of the forest, so is my love among the young men.” Where every other man is simply a tree in the forest, her man is completely unique to her. Apricot trees are generally 30-45 feet tall, quite strong, and bear sweet fruit. Thus, the Shulamite woman describes her man as tall and strong while bearing a sweetness about him. He provides shade (protection) and his love is described as a banner (generally signifying complete peace and victory) over his lovely young woman. (verses 3-4) The comparison of lovers to gazelles, does, or stags throughout the song are symbolic of grace, beauty, strength, and speed. (verses 7-9) The man refers to the young woman as his dove inferring her to be beautiful and soft, waiting to be called out of singleness and virginity by her husband lover and into marriage.

2) What is the purpose of the warning to the young women of Jerusalem? (verse 7)
Within historical context, we don’t know exactly who the “young women of Jerusalem” were first intended to be viewed as. Maybe they were equivalent to our modern day “Bridesmaids” who helped the bride prepare for her wedding day. Maybe, because Song of Solomon is a song, they are representative of a chorus, and the entire song was meant to be sung over the course of several days leading up to a wedding. What most scholars agree on is they were a group of some kind, probably unmarried, intending to represent a community around the couple, either singularly to the Beloved Bride or to both husband and wife. In verse 7, the Beloved Bride gives a warning to these “young women of Jerusalem”, “Do not stir up or awaken love until the appropriate time.” The description of the woman’s intimacy with the man in previous verses is so enticing the Bride feels she must charge the young women of Jerusalem to not jump into a passionate relationship prematurely. Intimacy is definitely wonderful and definitely worth the wait, but foregoing the commitment of a marriage relationship just to experience physical intimacy, misses the real depth of love and sex entirely. The woman’s senses are heightened and stirred by the man’s presence and affirmation of love for her. She finds herself feasting on it all, and feeling “lovesick”. (verses 5-6) She hungers for more of his nearness, and his offering of love only intensifies her desires. She began with a desire for his kisses and then longed for his embrace. (verses 4-6) Her passionate experience with her Lover urges her to give this charge to wait for “the appropriate time” to the unmarried women around her. She knows that intimate love, both physical and emotional, should have its own rhythm and proper progression. TOO Fast TOO soon spoils it all. Theologian, D Garret, adds his insights by saying, “For a woman to awaken love before it pleases is to deprive herself of the full experience of romance and sexuality…”.

3) How does Scripture connect a human marriage to a relationship between God and us?
In Exodus 34:15 (KJV), Israel is being warned not to “whore after their gods.” By describing idolatry with the language of prostitution and sexual immorality, Moses uses the sacredness of marriage as a metaphor to mirror the holiness of God’s covenant relationship with His people, Israel. Again, in the biography of the Old Testament prophet, Hosea, God commands Hosea to marry a prostitute, Gomer, who continually leaves him to return to prostitution. In Hosea’s life, God was giving Israel a visual, real-life picture of what it is to abandon Him as their God. (read more about this story in our Journey Theme, Bride!) In the New Testament, Paul applies the metaphor of marriage to the relationship between Christ and the Church of believers. “This mystery (of marriage) is profound, and I am saying it refers to Christ and the church.” (Ephesians 5:32) In Matthew 9:15, Jesus describes Himself as a Bridegroom and was recognized as such by John the Baptist. (John 3:29-30) After we understand the original context of the Song of Solomon, we can, by looking at the whole of Scripture, see how some of Solomon’s descriptions could describe the relationship between Christ and the Church. Where the apricot tree was the Beloved’s description of her Lover (verses 3-4), Christ is our ultimate strength and protection, totally unique and unlike any other for no one else can rescue us from our sin. “There is salvation in no one else, for there is no other name under heaven given to people by which we must be saved.” (Acts 4:12) As the Lover and Beloved care for each other, finding delight in each other in all things, so does God care and tenderly love each of us who call upon His Name for rescue from sin’s consequence. “Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God, so that he may exalt you at the proper time, casting all your cares on him, because he cares about you. (1 Peter 5:6-7) The Beloved and Lover celebrate their physical oneness. This picture mirrors how Christ-followers are to find spiritual oneness with God as His people. “They will be my people, and I will be their God.” (Jeremiah 32:38)

Everyday Application

1) What is the meaning of using fruits, flowers, and animals to describe this man and wife love relationship?
Celebrating our spouse as unique and special runs hard against our culture’s screaming voice. Pornography runs rampant, sex slaves are common in many cities, and the cut throat game of comparison is widespread across marketing, media, and even within our own hearts. How shockingly refreshing it is when one spouse brags on their marriage partner as being one-of-a-kind-wonderful?! In fact, when a husband or wife chooses to intentionally celebrate their spouse, they are fostering this kind of celebratory language to be shared between them. When they take it a step further, and celebrate their spouse to someone else, this encourages other marriage partners to step up their game when it comes to praising the attributes of their beloved one. While celebrating your spouse sounds simple, it can be difficult, especially if you’re walking through a difficult season in your marriage (as all of us have/are/will!). This challenge isn’t meant for us to close a blind eye to abusers within marriage, while amplifying “good things” to excuse abuse. Rather, this model from Song of Solomon is intended to give us a tool to speak life and unconditional love over our husbands. Where will you begin?! If you aren’t married, this challenge extends to you too! Consider this celebration as a tool to initiate flourishing in each of your relationships. Take the challenge to celebrate and begin to think highly, and uniquely, of others, speaking out loud these things to them and about them! Maybe you won’t use fruits, flowers, and animals in your descriptions, but, who knows, maybe you will! Leading like a lion or having hair that feels like silk are both encouraging and celebratory in our culture.

2) What is the purpose of the warning to the young women of Jerusalem? (verse 7)
True Love is worth waiting for! Oftentimes, in our culture, waiting to fulfill one’s sexual desires until marriage is an antiquated notion. Mainstream media encourages us to indulge in our sexual desires anytime we please. What the world doesn’t tell us, but God’s Word makes clear, is that “following our hearts” instead of God’s perfect plan only leads to pain and heartache. (Jeremiah 17:9, Proverbs 3:5-6) During my “young woman years”, I carried a strong conviction to never give myself (body or heart) away to any man until marriage. God gave me strength to hold fast to this conviction. When I met the man I would marry, and we began sharing emotionally, it became very difficult to keep myself pure. My mom warned, “It only takes one a passionate kiss to let go of your senses and go too far.” There were moments in our pre-marriage we came very close to not waiting as we shared passionate kisses, but we made it by HIS grace and strength and our marriage consummated in HIS time. Now, forty years of marriage have passed, and we rejoice in God’s love which has held us fast to Him despite struggles along the way. Everyone’s sexual history is different, but God’s grace is the same for each of us! Human love will always fail us, but redemptively, God allows even our broken relationships to continually point us to the ONE whose love will never falter and whose love will never let us down. There is no fear in the perfect love of God! (1 John 4:18) Whatever your sexual past, or present, looks like, confidently know that the Lord of all Love is waiting, not with condemnation, but with a wide welcoming embrace of love and forgiveness. I count my marriage struggles as JOY in spite of the scars of fallen human love because, through these, the Lord has brought us closer to the cross, both individually and as husband and wife. True Love is worth waiting for! Never give in, never give up, be patient in fervent prayer, and F. R. O. G. (Fully Relying On God)!

3) How does Scripture connect a human marriage to a relationship between God and us?
The Shulamite woman likens her Lover to an apple tree among the trees of the forest. He is strong and sturdy, and his shade covers and protects her from the scorching rays of the sun. In the same way, Jesus, our perfect bridegroom, shelters us with the power of His unfailing love. We are wrecked with our own sin, condemned to die and be eternally separated from the beauty and love of God. Christ, the perfect Love, took our place by suffering our due consequence for our sin when He died on the cross. He became separated from the glory of God the Father as He took on our consequence, though He was sinless. (Matthew 27:46) Three days later, He proved His victory over sin and death by coming back to life and later ascending through the clouds to sit at the right hand of God the Father. (Ephesians 1:20-21) Once we choose to fully trust Christ’s work on the cross for us, we become His and He becomes ours. He guards and protects our souls for eternity because He, the all-powerful God, loves us perfectly. (John 10:28)  As women, most of us spend our lives searching for our “perfect Lover” from teenage years until we find Mr. Right, our knight in shining armor. Ultimately, our hearts are designed to discover that only the Lord God can satisfy us completely. Whether we end up married or single, Christ must remain the fullness of our delight. When we shift our eyes to any lesser love, elevating him over God, we will find heartache, disappointment, and dissatisfaction. If we marry, husband and wife are designed to move forward together with many goals, but the highest being Christ. If we are single, the same is true as we move through life with many hopes and dreams, but our highest being Christ. He alone is to hold the position of pre-eminence. (Colossians 1:15-20) There will be rough roads all along the way for both single and married women, but the love of our great God never falters or abandons!

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Digging Deeper is for Everyone!

1) Take this passage (or any other passage).
2) Read it, and the verses around it,
several times
3) Write down your questions
as you think of them.
4) Ask specific culture related questions and be ready to dig around for your answers. Google them, use www.studylight.org, or look them up in a study Bible and read the footnotes (click on the little letters next to a word and it will show you
other related verses!). (www.esvbible.org)
5) Check your applications with other trusted Christians that you are in community with and embrace the fullness of God
in your everyday!

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Why Dig Deeper?

Finding the original meaning is a huge deal when we study Scripture and can make all the difference in our understanding as we apply God’s truths to our everyday lives.

In our modern-day relationships, we want people to understand our original intention as we communicate; how much more so between God and humanity?!

Here’s a little bit more on why we take Digging Deeper so seriously.

Study Tools

We love getting help while we study and www.studylight.org is one of many excellent resources, providing the original Hebrew (Old Testament) or Greek (New Testament) with an English translation.

Want to know more about a specific word in a verse? Click on “Strong’s Interlinear Bible” then click the word you’d like to study. Discover “origin”, “definition” and hear the original pronunciation – That Is Awesome!

Want more background? Click “Study Tools”, then pick a few commentaries to read their scholarly approach, keeping in mind that just because a commentary says it, doesn’t mean it’s true. (just like the internet :-))

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Beloved Day 1 Unveiled Faces

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Read His Words Before Ours!

2 Corinthians 3:1-18
1 Corinthians 13:1-13
Song of Solomon 2:1-17

Beloved, Day 1

“We all, with unveiled faces, are looking as in a mirror at the glory of the Lord and are being transformed into the same image from glory to glory; this is from the Lord who is the Spirit.”
(2 Corinthians 3:18)

Unveiled faces. Does that resonate differently now for anyone else in light of Covid-19? Walking in the front door of my house, I immediately remove my mask. Oh the freedom!

Now I admit, on days when an unwanted blemish visits and my mask covers it, I appreciate the ability to hide that flaw as I complete errands. However, I still remove my mask as soon as I possibly can. No amount of embarrassment will keep me wearing my mask, especially while at home.

As I sat down to write this study, which focuses on marriage and our relationship with the Lord, my mind turned to Moses and the mask, or veil, he used. Moses wore his face covering because his face shone so brightly after spending time with the Lord, the Israelites were afraid to approach him. (Exodus 34:29-35) However, the Lord spoke to Moses face-to-face, and their level of intimacy left Moses radiant . . . literally.

Today, when I loop my mask behind my ears, unfortunately, it is NOT because my face shines after encountering the Lord. Regardless of the why behind our masks, the outcome is still the same: covered faces. It’s amazing to see how wearing masks impacts social connections. We easily hide imperfections, but struggle to bridge the isolation the mask creates.

The same is true both in marriage and our relationships with the Lord. My husband and I cannonballed into marriage as we said our vows three days before the shelter-in-place order went into effect. Over the past few months, I have learned so much about him and myself. One of the greatest surprises and blessings has been the refreshing experience of knowing and being known on a deep level.

Neither my husband nor I are perfect; nor has our marriage been tested the way only time and a variety of challenging circumstances can. However, God is empowering us to extend grace to one another and, in that safe space of unveiling, to be courageous enough to be our true selves: physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually.

As a result, the last four months have been filled with serious amounts of love and growth. My love for him increases as he continues to embrace me, even after my flaws have been revealed and my quirks uncovered. I’ve grown as I’ve been challenged to die to myself and pour out grace to him as well, to embrace his quirks and flaws, and to love how I see Jesus in him.

In math only credited to the Lord, I am more drawn to my husband and our time together in the midst of unveiling, both painful and sweet. As hard as it may be, I delight in being known and challenged to continue to grow. In turn, tears come to my eyes in the moments I see how graciously loving him has blessed him and enabled him to grow, too.

Only the Lord could breathe passion into a relationship and so cause an increasing cycle of multiplication in which both parties benefit. Is marriage incredibly hard work, requiring intentionality, time, and a whole lot of Jesus? Most definitely, but it is deeply beautiful work. 

For readers who are unmarried, I urge you to cultivate this same passion for, and with, the Lord (my exhortation for married readers is the same!). I met my husband later in life and in my single years, I learned how to have hot dates with Jesus.

Because of those times with the Lord, I entered marriage without expecting my husband to complete me. I’d reached a place where I was content for it to be me and Him for the rest of my earthly days. Through my encounters with the Lord, and learning how to be unveiled before Him and with Him, I have grown the confidence to be vulnerable with my husband and to pour out grace as I see my husband unmasked, as well.

I still spend time with the Lord and am learning how to seek Him together with my husband. I recognize the health of all of my interactions is directly impacted by my walk with the Lord. 

The Lord created marriage as a reflection of the relationship we can have with Him. Imperfect humans will never build perfect marriages, although we can strive for strong, faithful relationships! However, the Lord, in His perfection, carries the weight of our covenant relationships with Him and invites us to know and be known by Him.

Regardless of our marital statuses, let’s each draw close to the Lord and risk being unmasked before Him. The love, passion, and connection experienced within His boundless love is well worth being seen.

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