Blessed Day 9 Intimacy: Digging Deeper

Digging Deeper Days
Finding the original intent of Scripture and making good application to our everyday lives as we become equipped to correctly handle the Word of Truth!
The Questions
1) Who are the lovers featured in Song of Solomon 7:1-13?
2) Why does the Bible include these passages about sex and intimacy?
3) What does it mean that the woman has treasured up every delicacy, old and new, for her love? (verse 13)
Song of Solomon 7:1-13
How beautiful are your sandaled feet, princess!
The curves of your thighs are like jewelry,
the handiwork of a master.
3 Your breasts are like two fawns,
twins of a gazelle.
4 Your neck is like a tower of ivory,
your eyes like pools in Heshbon
by Bath-rabbim’s gate.
Your nose is like the tower of Lebanon
looking toward Damascus.
5 Your head crowns you like Mount Carmel,
the hair of your head like purple cloth—
a king could be held captive in your tresses.
6 How beautiful you are and how pleasant,
my love, with such delights!
7 Your stature is like a palm tree;
your breasts are clusters of fruit.
8 I said, “I will climb the palm tree
and take hold of its fruit.”
May your breasts be like clusters of grapes,
and the fragrance of your breath like apricots.
9 Your mouth is like fine wine—
Woman
flowing smoothly for my love,
gliding past my lips and teeth!
10 I am my love’s,
and his desire is for me.
11 Come, my love,
let’s go to the field;
let’s spend the night among the henna blossoms.
12 Let’s go early to the vineyards;
let’s see if the vine has budded,
if the blossom has opened,
if the pomegranates are in bloom.
There I will give you my caresses.
13 The mandrakes give off a fragrance,
and at our doors is every delicacy,
both new and old.
I have treasured them up for you, my love.
Original Intent
1) Who are the lovers featured in Song of Solomon 7:1-13?
The biblical book Song of Solomon, or Song of Songs, as it is sometimes called, was written by Solomon sometime between 971 and 931 BC. Most scholars believe the lovers are Solomon and his wife, though which wife is not as clear. Author Tom Gledhill asserts in his book The Message of the Song of Songs that instead of being Solomon and his lover, “The couple are representative types of Everyman and Everywoman” (94) Whether we view Song of Solomon as a true love story between two specific people or simply as an example of a good marriage, there is much to be learned about love (both human and Divine) and intimate sex in the chapters given to us. Author Sharon Jaynes writes, “God made sure the explicit picture of romance and sexual intimacy is in the Bible for a reason (. . .) It’s as if He’s saying, this is how it’s done.” God gives us a road map for intimacy in marriage in Song of Solomon, but many theologians agree He is also giving us a picture of Jesus’ love for His Bride, the Church. Author Natalia Kohn suggests, “Solomon, the bridegroom, is meant to symbolize the powerful love of our eternal bridegroom, Jesus Christ. The Shulamite woman, our protagonist, models passion and love for her lover, a fascination with who He is, and a hunger for more of His love.” God wants us to love Him deeply and passionately, the way He loves us. (Ephesians 3:18) In giving us a guide for how to love our spouses well, God is also showing us how to love Him with fervent hearts and deepest devotion.
2) Why does the Bible include these passages about sex and intimacy?
If you read the Bible cover to cover, you won’t find another book like Song of Solomon full of romance, eroticism, poetry, and spiritual significance. While other Bible books mention love, sex, and romance, none enter into as much depth of description and creativity found in the Song of Solomon. Why would God include this evocative book about love and sex in His Scripture? God’s primary intention for including this evocative book on love and sex was likely to teach us how to view His amazing gift of sexual intimacy for married couples. Pastor Chuck Swindoll notes, “The fullness of the union that takes place at marriage is described in some of the most splendid poetic language in the entire Bible. In a world where so many speak of God’s special gifts with coldly clinical or apathetic statistical language, the passion of Solomon’s poetry refreshes a world thirsty for the truth about marriage.” Many believe that beyond the literal description of human love and intimacy, Song of Solomon provides a sense of how deeply Christ loves His bride, the church. Author David Guzik writes, “We find that this great song of songs illustrates the love, the intensity, and the beauty of relationship that should exist between God and the believer.” The bride responds to her Lover in Song of Solomon 7:10 by proclaiming, “I am my Love’s, and his desire is for me.” This phrase alone exemplifies how God loves us and created us for a holy union with Him, and how He longs for us to recognize and accept His great love. The Song of Solomon is God’s two-fold gift to His people, for it teaches us how to nurture sexual intimacy and how to relate to a God who loves us extravagantly.
3) What does it mean that the woman has treasured up every delicacy, old and new, for her love? (verse 13)
In Song of Solomon 7:13, the woman invites her lover to come away with her to the vineyards, telling him “The mandrakes give off a fragrance, and at our doors is every delicacy, both new and old. I have treasured them up for you, my love.” According to commentator David Guzik, “This difficult to translate phrase may have the sense that she is inviting him to enjoy intimacy in ways that are both familiar and new to the couple. The idea would be they would enjoy their lovemaking in creative ways that were planned in advance by the maiden.” Indeed, the mention of mandrakes would indicate a literal meaning of sexual intimacy, for, as commentator David M. Carr points out, “The mandrake or ‘love apple’ is a pungently fragrant plant long considered an aphrodisiac.” There are also arguments that the “old and new delicacies” of Song of Solomon 7:13 hold a spiritual significance. Author Tim Keller suggests, “Sex is for fully committed marriage relationships because it is to be a foretaste of the joy that comes from being in complete union with God. The most rapturous love between a man and woman is only a hint of God’s love for us.” The Bible provides this surprising guide to sex and marriage in the Song of Solomon to help us build intimacy in marriage, but it also instructs us that God gave the gift of sex within marriage to remind us of God’s intense love and deep longing for a covenant relationship with His people.
Everyday Application
1) Who are the lovers featured in Song of Solomon 7:1-13?
In Song of Solomon 7:1-9, Solomon is describing the beauty of his wife. He starts at her feet and moves all the way up to the crown of her head, appreciating every last detail he beholds. Some of the metaphors describing her beauty are easily understood, while others are lost on a modern reader. However, the love, romance, sensuality, and passion in the text are evident to readers of all eras. The couple knows one another so intimately that she takes up the steamy description in Song of Solomon 7:9, finishing his sentence for him. She knows she has his heart, and her words of love and desire are equally as symbolic and erotic as his are. King Solomon seems to be utterly in love with his bride, and she with him. It is confounding to me, then, that Solomon could love so deeply and so well and yet have a harem of wives and concubines, as seen in Song of Solomon 6:8 and I Kings 11:3. Why would God choose King Solomon, this woefully imperfect man, to pen this beautiful book about intimacy in marriage? Author David Guzik suggests, “Perhaps the Song of Solomon does not reflect Solomon’s actual experience – certainly not in an enduring sense – but his wise analysis and skillful presentation of the glory of romantic and sensual love.” It is difficult for me to accept admonitions from someone who made as many mistakes as Solomon did, but I must remember that 2 Timothy 3:16-17 says “all Scripture is inspired by God and is profitable for teaching, for rebuking, for correcting, for training in righteousness, so that the man of God may be complete, equipped for every good work.” God inspired the words of King Solomon, so I know I can trust its message is perfect and true, even though the human author was far from perfect.
2) Why does the Bible include these passages about sex and intimacy?
The Bible contains instruction on how to be a better parent, how to manage finances, and how to treat other people, but looking to the Bible for instruction on sex and intimacy seems…uncomfortable. In fact, when a pastor says to open our Bibles to the Song of Solomon, people tend to squirm. Nobody wants to hear the preacher read, “Your breasts are like two fawns, twins of a gazelle” (Song of Solomon 7:3)! If, however, we move past our discomfort of discussing sex in the Bible, we discover much about marital intimacy from God’s perspective. When describing the lovers in Song of Solomon, author Duane Garrett suggests “They relish their pleasure in each other not only with physical action, but with carefully composed words. Love is, above all, a matter of the mind and heart and should be declared.” Song of Solomon teaches us that thoughtful communication is part of a successful intimate relationship. We also learn from this book that God created sex to be a joyous celebration of love. Author C.J. Mahaney suggests, “Solomon’s Song teaches us that lovemaking is intended by God to be an elaborate and pleasurable feast of the senses — a holy immersion in erotic joy.” C.J. Mahaney also concludes that the lovers do not have sex just to fulfill physical desire. “They want to be together because they are in love, and the sex they enjoy with one another is an expression of that love.” God has given us the Song of Solomon to show us how to have a fulfilling marriage, but it can also point us to having a fulfilling relationship with Jesus. As author Iain Duguid notes, “A depiction of the best of all loves and the most wonderful of marriages will inevitably turn our hearts toward Christ, who has truly loved us and is the answer for our deep brokenness.” No human relationship, regardless of how intimate or rewarding, can bring healing and restoration to our hearts like knowing Christ can. (Psalm 147:3) Those of us who have trusted Jesus as our personal Savior make up His church, which He calls His Bride. (2 Corinthians 11:2) He loves us with the devotion of the husband in the Song of Solomon, and he wants us to be His faithful and loving bride.
3) What does it mean that the woman has treasured up every delicacy, old and new, for her love? (verse 13)
A recent societal buzzword has been purposeful or intentional. It is interesting to note how the Shulamite woman in the Song of Solomon does exactly this. She invites her husband to steal away with her, “Come, my love, let’s go to the field; let’s spend the night among the henna blossoms. Let’s go early to the vineyards; let’s see if the vine has budded, if the blossom has opened, if the pomegranates are in bloom. There I will give you my caresses. The mandrakes give off a fragrance, and at our doors is every delicacy, both new and old. I have treasured them up for you, my love.” (Song of Solomon 7:11-13) She plans and initiates an intimate time with her husband on purpose. She chooses a romantic place and assures him she has treasured up delicacies, both old and new, for them to share. He has been pursuing her, saying, “Your head crowns you like Mount Carmel, the hair of your head like purple cloth—a king could be held captive in your tresses. How beautiful you are and how pleasant, my love, with such delights!” (Song of Solomon 7:5-6) The couple intentionally nurtures their unity and passion. Author Sharon Jaynes argues, “The Shulamite was a wise woman who took deliberate action to make her marriage sing with intimacy that was purposeful and playful. I envision her sauntering up to her husband as he’s overseeing the fields. She whispers in his ear, and her warm breath teases his neck. Tempting him. Flirting with him still. . . And God whispers to us through her words, this is one of the secrets to lifelong love. Pull away. Be intentional. Leave nothing to chance.” Many marriages start off with both partners making time for each other, but stressors and responsibilities dim the passion and purposefulness that once nourished intimacy. We would do well to heed the deliberate acts of the Shulamite woman. Their intimacy was worthy of their sacrifice in other areas. We all have responsibilities that need our attention, but none as important as our marriage relationship. Strong marriages can point others to the love of Christ! Let’s purpose to put our marriages ahead of other priorities.
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Digging Deeper is for Everyone!
1) Take this passage (or any other passage).
2) Read it, and the verses around it,
several times
3) Write down your questions
as you think of them.
4) Ask specific culture related questions and be ready to dig around for your answers. Google them, use www.studylight.org, or look them up in a study Bible and read the footnotes (click on the little letters next to a word and it will show you
other related verses!). (www.esvbible.org)
5) Check your applications with other trusted Christians that you are in community with and embrace the fullness of God
in your everyday!
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Why Dig Deeper?
Finding the original meaning is a huge deal when we study Scripture and can make all the difference in our understanding as we apply God’s truths to our everyday lives.
In our modern-day relationships, we want people to understand our original intention as we communicate; how much more so between God and humanity?!
Here’s a little bit more on why we take Digging Deeper so seriously.
Study Tools
We love getting help while we study and www.studylight.org is one of many excellent resources, providing the original Hebrew (Old Testament) or Greek (New Testament) with an English translation.
Want to know more about a specific word in a verse? Click on “Strong’s Interlinear Bible” then click the word you’d like to study. Discover “origin”, “definition” and hear the original pronunciation – That Is Awesome!
Want more background? Click “Study Tools”, then pick a few commentaries to read their scholarly approach, keeping in mind that just because a commentary says it, doesn’t mean it’s true. (just like the internet :-))
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