Gracefully Truthful

  • #HisWordsBeforeOurs
  • contact@gracefullytruthful.com
  • Register!
  • Today’s Journey
  • Previous Journeys
  • Faces of Grace
  • GT Bookstore
  • Our Mission
    • Our Mission
    • #HisWordsBeforeOurs
    • Our Beliefs
    • Translations Matter
    • #GTGoingGlobal
    • Our Team
#GTGoingGlobal

racial injustice

Palette Day 10 Breaking The Silence

October 13, 2017 by Sara Colquhoun Leave a Comment

Read His Words Before Ours!

Acts 17:26
Romans 10:12-13
Malachi 2:10 

Jessica and I have been friends for the better part of six years and my life has been forever changed because of her joy, wisdom, and laughter. I can talk to her when I have tough questions about race that I don’t understand; she’s patient with me, and shares her heart as I listen. I’ve been silent for too long, for fear of saying the wrong thing. So for today’s Journey, we’ve got a Q & A dialogue between the two of us, breaking the silence.

1. Were there any instances growing up where you felt you were treated differently or unfairly because of the color of your skin?
Growing up I went to predominantly Caucasian schools, so to me, it was normal to be a “minority.” I grew up in California so racism wasn’t something that I even thought about until I moved to the south and began traveling overseas. Once I moved, color was instantly shoved in my face. I felt like I constantly had to make an effort to have at least one black friend to ensure I wasn’t offending anyone. When I was closer to a white girl than a black girl, my skin color was automatically questioned. When I acted a certain way, or liked certain things that weren’t deemed “black,” I was instantly a white girl. I was told my white friends were more “black” than me. I was presumably a good dancer because of the color of my skin (don’t get me wrong, your girl CAN get down), or not ghetto enough because I didn’t smoke or choose rap music as my favorite.
I didn’t fit the mold of a stereotypical black person, so people told me I wasn’t.

2. As an African-American living in the south, what are some of the biggest differences you see in our culture today?
Honestly, I think one of the biggest differences is that most African Americans from my generation are more worried about their life than they’ve ever been. They worry about their kids, family, and friends who are African American more now, than they did growing up. I’ve travelled to over twenty-five countries and I fear more for my life living in the south than I did traveling the world. Driving by a police officer I pray I don’t get pulled over, and if I do, that I’m met with a nice officer. If I see an African American pulled over, I say a prayer for them, hoping that they make it home to their family. I’ve grown accustomed to being met with racism, where I’ve grown up expecting kindness.

3. You’re currently the nanny for twin Caucasian two year olds. Tell me what it’s like and any adversity you face as an African American taking care of them.
I’ve been watching kids since I was eleven, and I’d say over 90% of the kids I’ve babysat for have been Caucasian so taking the job as the twins’ nanny was normal to me. I started when they were just three months, so when they got bigger and the weather got nice, we ventured outside and everyone marveled over the twins. I honestly don’t think they even noticed the color of my skin.

I do remember one day when we were out for lunch; as the twins have a double stroller, navigating through doors can be a task. We were leaving Moe’s and this nice Caucasian lady held the door open. As we were walking away she looked at me and said, “Congratulations!” I stopped and paused for a second, confused. I then stuttered and said ‘thanks’ with an awkward smile on my face.

She thought the twins were mine.  She had a clear view of them, and me. While I was confused in the moment, walking back to their house, I couldn’t help but smile and laugh. In my head I thought, this is how it should be. When people see a lady with kids who aren’t the same color, instead of assuming they’re “the help,” they assume she’s the mother. I think it’s a beautiful and a hopeful picture of the future. The worst thing I’ve encountered have been questioning looks that I either ignore, or meet with a smile and tell the twins to say hi to them.

4. How can we, as a church body, better support each other’s differences? I know many people, including myself, fear saying the wrong thing so we stay silent.
To be honest, one of the biggest things is acknowledgement. You may not understand, or be able to relate, but saying something is better than saying nothing. Saying the phrase ‘Black Lives Matter’ doesn’t mean we’re saying yours don’t, we simply want you to know we matter too. Acknowledge that we want you to stand with us, and value us as an important part of your congregation, especially when it is a predominately Caucasian church.

We see what you share, post, and comment on social media platforms, especially when it contradicts conversations we’ve had face to face.
We want to feel safe and united with the congregation, and by you acknowledging that things take place in the world that affect us differently because of the color of our skin, it helps begin to bridge the gap of understanding. Acknowledge that when you’re silent as racism occurs, it says you don’t care, and while you may not understand, sympathy goes a long way. Ultimately, it’s time to stop using ‘I don’t understand’ as an excuse, and allow these injustices to break your heart like they do the Lord’s.

When President Trump was elected, my pastor sent a group text to all the African Americans in our church. I’ll never forget his kindness, as it was such an example of loving those different than you. The end of his text read: “I’m so honored to be your pastor. I want you to know that I need your voice in my life, and when something matters to you, it matters to me. If I can serve you in any way, just let me know.” This is what it’s about.

I’m so grateful for my friend, Jessica. My life has been uniquely blessed by her.
Link arms with us by giving voice to reality, and bridging a gap that feels unsafe in so many ways.
Together, let’s break the silence!


Ready for more? Dig Deeper!
Join us for every Journey Study by signing up!
Looking for yesterday’s Journey Study?
Share your thoughts from today’s Study!

Don’t miss today’s Digging Deeper!     And we’d love to hear your thoughts from today’s Journey!    Comment Here!

Embracing God’s fullness in our lives is rooted in scripture and memorizing His word is vital to our continued growth and depth with Jesus. Tap and hold from your mobile device to download this week’s verse and make it your phone’s lockscreen!

Thanks for joining us today as we journeyed into Palette Week Two! Don’t miss out on the discussion below – we’d love to hear your thoughts!
Click the above image for today’s Digging Deeper!

Looking for other journeys from this theme?
Here’s a link to all past studies in Palette!

Posted in: Accepted, Bold, Borders, Brave, Character, church, Community, Courage, Dignity, Excuses, Fear, Hope, Legacy, Life, Love, Peace, persecution, Purpose, Relationship, Transformation, Trust, Truth, Welcome Tagged: borders, excuse, justice, kindness, love, outward, palette, people, racial healing, racial injustice, silence

Palette Day 8 Side By Side

October 11, 2017 by Merry Ohler Leave a Comment

Read His Words Before Ours!

Romans 12:9-21
Psalm 97:10-12
Hebrews 13:1-2 

Full transparency?

The thought of this Journey theme, Palette, made me squirm. When Rebecca first mentioned racial injustice as a Journey theme, I knew that we were supposed to do it… but that didn’t make the topic any easier to broach. Let’s face it: we live in tumultuous times. We tear each other down with our words and actions, but even more so with our self-oriented “status updates” and “likes.” Some of us imagine we are subtly snubbing our sisters and brothers by passive-aggressively “with-holding our likes.” (Oh, it’s a thing alright. Google “withholding likes.” You’ll be amazed…and you just might recognize something that resonates.) We build each other up by “sharing” posts and “commenting” our support, but when it comes to relating to one another in person, in real life, we fall painfully short.

Sometimes we aren’t sure what to do or say when we witness an injustice take place. Sometimes we know what to do or say, but we are afraid of rocking the boat.
Sometimes we are so afraid of saying the wrong thing,
or the right thing in the wrong way,
that we get completely caught up in our own heads and fail to say anything at all.
Two questions return to mind.
Is this loving well?
Is this loving at all?
When faced with this injustice, do we withdraw from engaging those around us because we are so worried about semantics that we forget our calling – to love?
Sometimes, we do.

I sat down with my friend, Dom, to talk about her experiences growing up as part of a minority group. I asked her to share with me some of the things she had experienced that have affected how she raises her own daughter, things that someone else like me might take for granted. I’m not really sure what I was expecting to hear or learn, but the insight she shared brought several points into sharp focus for me.

Dom shared that growing up in the midwest, she was one of only a few black students in her high school about 20 minutes outside of Kansas City. She compared her high school experience to any other, with highs and lows and in-betweens. In high school and now, years later she mentioned that classmates and friends would begin sentences with “No offense, but…” in reference to her. This only ever served to create or highlight offense, because the words which followed inevitably compared her to other people her friends considered part of her minority group. She recalled one instance in which a classmate used hateful language and racial slurs in reference to her. She shared that while it was awful, he later apologized for his words and she forgave him. Dom explained that for the most part, she hasn’t really felt that she has been the victim of the kinds of things we often expect or hear about when it comes to racism. While she is keenly aware of the things happening within the United States in terms of injustice and minority groups, she chooses to keep a positive outlook and is intent on teaching that to her young daughter as well. “I try to teach her that every person is different and has different experiences. We have to look at people as individuals, rather than groups. I try to teach her to look out for people who need a friend,” Dom stated.

When asked what we can all do to pull together to “right the ship,” Dom readily shared. “We are not listening to one another. We need to stop and listen. I feel like we forgot how to be loving and caring to one another.”

She’s right. We are each so often caught up in our own perceptions of others and their experiences or background that we are failing to see them as individuals. Even when I scheduled my meeting with Dom, I held subconscious expectations of what she would share with me. I assumed she would have numerous instances to share, stories of wild injustice and times when she had been slighted. That was wrong of me. Even with my best intentions, I lumped her into a group of people who had been wronged in many ways. I wasn’t thinking about her and her experiences with an open mind and no expectations.

Sisters, we have to stop. We have to listen. We have to be loving and caring to one another, and we can’t do that if we continue to feed our own expectations rather than asking others to share their stories with us. We can’t expect to come alongside those who are hurting when we are unwilling to find out why they personally are hurting.

I would encourage you to reach out to a friend or family member this week. Maybe they are a member of a minority group, or maybe you are. Either way, ask to meet over a cup of coffee. Ask them to share their stories with you.
Then, listen.

Share your thoughts from today’s Journey Study!
Can we pray for you?
Sign up to receive every Journey Study!

Join the GT Community and share your thoughts!

Embracing God’s fullness in our lives is rooted in scripture and memorizing His word is vital to our continued growth and depth with Jesus. Tap and hold from your mobile device to download this week’s verse and make it your phone’s lockscreen!

Thanks for joining us today as we journeyed into Palette Week Two! Don’t miss out on the discussion below – we’d love to hear your thoughts!

Looking for other journeys from this theme?
Here’s a link to all past studies in Palette!

Posted in: Community, Faith, Fear, Forgiven, Uncategorized Tagged: afraid, Brave, Community, faith, forgiveness, healing, racial inequality, racial injustice, racism, relating

Gracefully Truthful Ministries

© 2022 Gracefully Truthful Ministries, All Rights Reserved, 501(c)3 certified

And the Word became flesh and dwelt among us, and we have seen His glory, glory as of the only Son from the Father, full of grace and truth. John 1:14