rejection

Follow Day 8 Whole Surrender

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Read His Words Before Ours!

1 Samuel 16:1-13
1 Samuel 17:20-54
Psalm 69:1-12
Jeremiah 24:4-10
Luke 1:26-33

Follow, Day 8

Rejection. 

The experience of being turned away, excluded, dismissed, or unwanted.

Merely reading the description brings a swell of emotion, doesn’t it? We’ve all felt the sharp wounds of rejection sometime in our lives. We have experienced it at the hands of our peers, friends, and classmates. Worse, we’ve felt it from those we expect to love us best, our parents, siblings, our children, even our spouse. The closer the relationship, the more extensive the damage tends to be.

And it’s a double edged sword, isn’t it? Because when we are rejected, our deepest need to be approved and accepted is brought into sharper relief. The very thing we desire most is withheld from us, which leaves us feeling even smaller and needier, if possible. We waver between hurt that another could make us feel this way, and anger that we allowed ourselves to be so vulnerable. We’re left with an overwhelming urge to run and hide.

I remember it well. The defensive pull to withdraw from relationships and close ourselves off is powerful.   

David, the shepherd boy-turned-king, was well acquainted with rejection. When Samuel came to his father’s home in search of the Lord’s next anointed king, David was literally the last to come to Jesse’s mind. As time went by, God made space for him in King Saul’s court to play his lyre when Saul was troubled, and he became Saul’s armor bearer.

However, when Saul’s army was camped out, hiding from the threats of the Philistine Goliath, David faced rejection again. His oldest brother, Eliab, grew angry at David’s bold words. He mistook the Holy Spirit’s stirring in David for arrogance, and threw his lowly status of shepherd in David’s face. Saul heard about David’s words and summoned him, only to serve yet another helping of rejection by pointing out David’s youth and inexperience.

But David persisted. Goliath fell, and God was glorified.

Those weren’t David’s only experiences with rejection. Repeatedly, he faced rejection from those he loved and led. Saul gave his daughter Michal to David in marriage, following his defeat of Goliath, but later did everything in his power to kill him. David’s men grew tired of running and hiding, and blamed him for the situation. They, too, wanted to kill him. He faced discouragement and isolation. David literally spent time hiding in caves from those who rejected him and wanted to murder him.

But still, he pressed on.

When we think about the rejection we have faced in our lives, it pales by comparison, doesn’t it? Few, if any of us, have experienced such significant rejection.

Yet, when we do face rejection, do we allow God to heal those places and persist in following His call? Or do we turn away from the illuminating light of revelation and attempt to nurse our wounds in the dark?

I know what my answer has been. I’m betting yours has been pretty similar, too.

So, what’s the difference between us and David?
“I’m no hero of the faith!”
We’re all thinking it.

And yet.

Scripture tells us from the time David was anointed, the Spirit of God rested powerfully on him. Throughout David’s life, he wrestled with sin; he was a man, just like anyone else. But he was a wholly surrendered man. His heart posture was positioned to follow God, wherever He might lead. When confronted with his mistakes and sin, David was grieved. He acknowledged his sins against God, and he turned from his ways. Many times, David could have taken the reins and done what he thought was right. There were several opportunities when he could have simply killed Saul and taken the throne. He knew God had anointed him as the next king of Israel. No one would have blamed him; King Saul was murderous and deranged.

But David didn’t expect his God to serve and follow him. He served and followed his God.

Woo. The conviction cuts deep, doesn’t it? Same.

Because regardless of the pretty words we use to talk about our faith, and regardless of anyone else’s perception of us, our response in the face of rejection reveals our heart posture, doesn’t it? If we do not press in to follow our Father in the face of rejection, we are seeking the approval and acceptance of others over our King.
When we try to fill our need with anything other than God, we aren’t following God at all.

Think about it. Think about the time you give to the Lord. Time in prayer, in relationship with Him. I’m not talking about what you “do” for Him. Do you give your time to the Lord? Do you serve and follow your God? Or do you do what makes you happy, and expect Him to fit in somewhere around the edges?

Do we really know what it means to be wholly surrendered, Love? Perhaps the greater question: do we even think it possible in this day and age?

Love, it is! But it’s not something we can manufacture in our own strength or willpower. It is only possible by the power of the Holy Spirit. The truth? It’s not something our human nature even wants. God Himself must instill the desire within us.

In the same way God turned David’s heart toward Himself, He can and will do the same for us, Love!

The real question is . . . do we want Him to?

Heavenly Father, You are my King. I confess that I haven’t lived like it, but I want to change. Lord, change my heart, and give me a desire to live fully surrendered to Your will. I can’t do it on my own, but I know You can and will. Show me how to respond to You, every day. I love and praise You, only. In Jesus’ name, amen.


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Beloved Day 12 Seasons Of Love: Digging Deeper

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Digging Deeper Days

Finding the original intent of Scripture and making good application to our everyday lives as we become equipped to correctly handle the Word of Truth!

Yesterday’s Journey Study connects with today’s!
Check out Seasons Of Love!

The Questions

1) Why might the woman have paused before opening the door to her loved one (verse 3)?

2) Why did the man not continue to wait for her to open the door (verse 6)?

3) Verse 7 seems to indicate abuse of the woman. What might be the significance of this being included in the passage?

4) How does the woman express her disappointment of not finding her loved one? (verse 8)

Song of Solomon 5:3-8

3 I have taken off my clothing. How can I put it back on? I have washed my feet. How can I get them dirty? 4 My love thrust his hand through the opening, and my feelings were stirred for him. 5 I rose to open for my love. My hands dripped with myrrh, my fingers with flowing myrrh on the handles of the bolt. 6 I opened to my love, but my love had turned and gone away. My heart sank because he had left. I sought him, but did not find him. I called him, but he did not answer.

7 The guards who go about the city found me. They beat and wounded me; they took my cloak from me—the guardians of the walls. 8 Young women of Jerusalem, I charge you, if you find my love, tell him that I am lovesick.

Original Intent

1) Why might the woman have paused before opening the door to her loved one (verse 3)?
Since this book is not a chronological account of the events between Solomon and his beloved, there are some difficult passages to unravel. This one is no exception. In verse 2 of the chapter, we read the bride’s words, “I was sleeping, but my heart was awake.” As in chapter 3 verse 1, we are left with questions about the sequence and the reality of the couple’s actions in this scene. Is the young woman dreaming, or is she at the drowsy verge of being awakened? Since many Bible commentators have come to different conclusions, it seems unnecessary to dwell too long in a discussion about this. More importantly is the big picture. In these verses we encounter a scenario of a real-life relationship which included human responses. The young woman knows her loved one is at the door, but she is either too tired or too lazy to get up, get dressed, and open the door for him. David Guzik says, “her problem was not that she didn’t go to the door; but that she did it so slowly and reluctantly, making excuses all along the way. [This reveals she was] thinking only about her comfort and not at all about Solomon’s desires or her relationship with him.” (enduringword.com)

2) Why did the man not continue to wait for her to open the door (verse 6)?
The woman’s lover reminded her that he was standing on the outside waiting. “Open to me, my sister, my darling, my dove, my perfect one. For my head is drenched with dew, my hair with droplets of the night.” (verse 2) Whether or not the terms in verse 4 are explicit references regarding sexual intimacy, the scene certainly portrays an active pursuit of one lover desiring to be with the other, but being met with rejection. I think the best interpretation is to read this within the framework Guzik describes as a “missed connection” between the bride and groom, and therefore we should apply it literally rather than symbolically. (enduringword.com) The groom has been waiting patiently outside the door of the bride’s room. As he was leaving, he likely placed myrrh on the door handle as was customary in ancient settings. We are not given the reasons why the woman paused, but the delay causes her beloved to leave. It does not appear he was angry with her, and the emphasis again seems to be on the passion of the bride once she realizes his loving gesture. The bride’s emotions are awakened and she has legitimate feelings of despair because her loved one can’t be found.

3) Verse 7 seems to indicate abuse of the woman. What might be the significance of this being included in the passage?
In chapter 3 we read how the watchmen were helpful to the woman as she frantically sought her beloved. But now verse 7 seems so out of place. What is happening? In then-current day, there were two sorts of watchmen in a city. One guarded from the inside of a city wall to ensure all those within were safe and secure. The others were placed on the walls themselves to watch and give notice of an enemy approaching. (Bible Study Tools, David Gill) The watchmen on the wall would be aware that the only women who would be on the streets at night were prostitutes. Not realizing who she is, they treat her with inappropriate disregard, even abusing her. Whether a dream or reality, we surely feel the stab to our hearts as we read what the bride endured as she runs out into the night. She so desires to find the one she loves that she risks her wellbeing to search for him. Nothing is mentioned about her response to what she experiences, but we share her anguish over not finding her groom. These verses are communicating unrelenting passion and desire between a bride and her groom at all costs.

4) How does the woman express her disappointment of not finding her loved one? (verse 8)
We have read in the previous chapters how the couple speaks to one another with words describing their longing for, and their satisfaction in, one another. Here in verse 8, the bride begins to plead with the women of the town to help her find her groom. It appears she has deep regret over her rejection of his advances, and she now wants to let him know how much she longs for him.  In Song of Solomon 2:4-6, the bride expresses her soul’s desire toward her new groom in those pleasant moments of marital intimacy and passion. She was overwhelmed by the presence of love and the joy of lovemaking. Here in chapter 5, the young woman aches over the distance she has created with her beloved. She has become physically and emotionally ill due to her yearning love for him. She asks the city’s women to “tell him that I am lovesick.” The Septuagint (the Greek translation of the Hebrew OT) uses the verb titrosko which means inflicted with a wound, injured, damaged. The Shulamite woman is emotionally and physically overwrought. (preceptaustin.org) Within the context, we can surmise she is craving more moments with the groom. She grieves the way she let him slip away due to her unwillingness to respond when he came to her.

Everyday Application

1) Why might the woman have paused before opening the door to her loved one (verse 3)?
We don’t know all the motives behind why the bride doesn’t go to the door. She expresses it would be somewhat of a hassle since she has already changed clothes, whether it is weariness or laziness, we are not sure. What we discover as we read further in the passage, though, is that she regrets her inaction to open the door to her beloved. While there will be times in marriage that one person lacks a desire to make much effort toward intimacy (due to fatigue or distress), we should not make it a habit to neglect our spouse’s need for sexual and physical closeness. This will likely require ongoing conversation and work in our relationships as we strive for a healthy marriage. As we think about this in spiritual terms, we can also pray for our hearts to be receptive to our Beloved Savior. Bible teacher Harry Ironside says this is a great picture of our own callousness toward Divine Love. “When [Christ] comes to the heart’s door we practically say, ‘No; it is inconvenient. I do not want to drop things right now.’” What an even greater tragedy to reject God’s perfect love. (John 3:16-19)

2) Why did the man not continue to wait for her to open the door (verse 6)?
The bottom line of this verse is how the groom was demonstrating his desire for his bride. He was patient. He did not force his way in, nor did he demand her to meet his expectations. Instead, he waited and then quietly slipped away, but not before leaving a symbol of his love. What beautiful restraint and gentleness was shown by this man. Although his loved one did not receive him in the way he expected, he chose kindness. Putting a fragrance on the bolt handles would have been akin to leaving flowers by the door. Sometimes in marriage we don’t feel the emotional attachment to our husband. When that happens, we can begin by praying for God to stir passion in us. Years ago, I heard a woman Bible teacher talk about how she prayed for her marriage. She said one of her prayers was that she would “always thrill to her husband’s touch.” That is a good start! Whether we are the initiator or the one waiting, our goal should be to demonstrate unrelenting love. Friend, maybe you feel that any sign of promising light is so far in the distance you are unable to see it. I pray you will not lose hope. God will be faithful as you pursue a passionate and lasting marriage.

3) Verse 7 seems to indicate abuse of the woman. What might be the significance of this being included in the passage?
The picture of the beloved bride of the king being assaulted by his own watchmen is appalling! Whether she is dreaming or is in fact walking around at night like a prostitute, she is a desperate woman in search of the one her heart longs to be near. She has felt the pangs of dismissing her lover’s kind and patient pursuit. It has been said that “absence makes the heart grow fonder.” I doubt that is always true as I have seen absence push people apart. But one of the ways we can create a healthy kind of distance that inspires desire is to rehearse the benefits of being married to our husband. When marriages are struggling, it is hard to find the good in the other person. Our human tendency is to rehearse our weariness with it all. As we do, we only add to our growing list of reasons not to make efforts. However, when alone with our thoughts, considering the good things of our marriage and the positive characteristics of our husbands helps stir our emotions toward desire. As the bride longed to find her beloved groom, God can restore our passions as we pray and work to bridge the gap we may or may not have caused.

4) How does the woman express her disappointment of not finding her loved one? (verse 8)
The Shulamite woman had gone from being “too tired” to being “lovesick.” She desperately went searching for the one her heart so deeply loved. She called those around her to join her in her search. Sister, enlist your own army of women to support you in your marriage. No, I’m not asking you to find friends to whom you can badmouth your husband. I am encouraging you to gather those around you who will remind you to “love your husbands … so God’s word will not be slandered.” (Titus 2:4) It is not an easy journey, this thing called marriage. But with God’s help, and with friends pointing us to Christ, we can pursue the kind of passionate relationship we read of in Song of Solomon!

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Digging Deeper is for Everyone!

1) Take this passage (or any other passage).
2) Read it, and the verses around it,
several times
3) Write down your questions
as you think of them.
4) Ask specific culture related questions and be ready to dig around for your answers. Google them, use www.studylight.org, or look them up in a study Bible and read the footnotes (click on the little letters next to a word and it will show you
other related verses!). (www.esvbible.org)
5) Check your applications with other trusted Christians that you are in community with and embrace the fullness of God
in your everyday!

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Why Dig Deeper?

Finding the original meaning is a huge deal when we study Scripture and can make all the difference in our understanding as we apply God’s truths to our everyday lives.

In our modern-day relationships, we want people to understand our original intention as we communicate; how much more so between God and humanity?!

Here’s a little bit more on why we take Digging Deeper so seriously.

Study Tools

We love getting help while we study and www.studylight.org is one of many excellent resources, providing the original Hebrew (Old Testament) or Greek (New Testament) with an English translation.

Want to know more about a specific word in a verse? Click on “Strong’s Interlinear Bible” then click the word you’d like to study. Discover “origin”, “definition” and hear the original pronunciation – That Is Awesome!

Want more background? Click “Study Tools”, then pick a few commentaries to read their scholarly approach, keeping in mind that just because a commentary says it, doesn’t mean it’s true. (just like the internet :-))

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Kaleidoscope Day 15 Cannot Fail

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Read His Words Before Ours!

1 Corinthians 13:8-10
Jeremiah 31:1-6
Isaiah 54:4-10
Hosea 2:14-23

Kaleidoscope, Day 15

“Love never fails.”
Pretty words.

We’ve heard them uttered before, many times, and we know from Scripture that God is love.
But what do they mean for us right now, today?
How do we hold fast to that truth and proclaim Kingdom reality in the now,
when what we are walking in the natural feels like…

Abandonment
Addiction
Adultery
Anxiety
Depression
Disgust
Doubt
Embarrassment
Fear
Grief
Guilt
Illness
Isolation
Loneliness
Loss
Rejection
Self-loathing
Shame
Worthlessness

How do we actively carry His Kingdom in what feels like a terribly broken vessel? How do we reconcile the juxtaposition of what we see and feel in the natural with what our God says about His Kingdom, who He says we are as Kingdom carriers, and most importantly, Who He is?

When our focus is centered on ourselves and how we feel, we struggle to shift out of that mindset and into a mental place where we are wholly fixed on God, what He says, what He is doing and what He has done. In order to break out of that mental and spiritual pattern of thinking, our minds, souls and spirits need to soak in truth we find only in Scripture.

Listen, friend. This is truth worth repeating:
Our minds, souls and spirits need to soak in truth we find only in Scripture.

All throughout history, God has shown Himself strong in the lives of people who wrestled with keeping their eyes in the Kingdom, while at the same time, acknowledging what was happening in the natural.

Adam and Eve
The first man and woman were designed to walk with the Lord in the garden of Eden. Adam and Eve lived in a time and space that pre-existed the internet, drugs, alcohol, pornography, and a multitude of other worldly temptations and distractions. If anyone could have possibly gotten it “right,” you’d think it would be them. But, the serpent woo’d Eve with the temptation of superior knowledge, and both she and Adam took the bait.
Man sinned against God, and the first Eden was lost.

And yet, Love never failed.

Sin was no surprise to Him. Before the creation of the world, He knew it was coming. The first Adam would fail, but the way was paved for the second Adam (Jesus) to fulfill all righteousness. While the banishment of Adam and Eve from the garden might seem harsh, the Lord was working out His purpose of salvation to provide rescue for all who would inherit sinful flesh.

Abraham and Sarah
Known as the father of many nations, God made a covenant with Abraham and told him his descendants would outnumber the sand on the shores and stars in the sky. In the natural, Abraham could see he and his wife were far too old. He longed to believe God, and we can’t know his heart, but we do know from Scripture he and Sarah attempted to bring about the fulfillment of God’s covenant by their own design. As a result, Ishmael was born to Haggar, and the division we see now in the Middle East can be traced all the way back to an action rooted in the doubt that God would not accomplish what He said He would accomplish.

And yet, Love never failed.

God accomplished exactly what He promised. Sarah became pregnant, and gave birth to Isaac, and through him, Abraham did become the father of many nations. Although Abraham and Sarah’s actions brought about repercussions that are still felt in current culture, God’s Plan was not thwarted.

Moses
The vessel God used to deliver the Israelites out of Egypt. Moses was an understandably conflicted guy. Sentenced to death as a Hebrew baby boy, he was rescued when his mother placed him in a basket in the river. Egyptian royalty discovered and adopted him, and raised him as a prince of Egypt…but Moses struggled with his identity. One day, when he came upon an Egyptian beating a Hebrew slave, Moses murdered the Egyptian and buried him in the sand. When he was confronted by his own people, he ran.

And yet, Love never failed.

Moses made a terrible mistake, but God is in the business of transformation. He loves to take someone we would write off and rewrite their story in a way that brings unmistakable glory to His name. Amid feelings of fear and inadequacy, Moses protested about being the mouthpiece for God. Nevertheless, God gave him Aaron as a helper, and Moses accomplished God’s good purpose and delivered the Israelites out of Egypt.

Jesus
Fully God and fully man, Jesus is our Emmanuel, God With Us. The new Adam, sent to fulfill the law perfectly where we only fall short. Though His message was love and His healing brought deliverance, His own people, the Jews, did not receive Him. In fact, He was crucified by the very people He came to free.

And yet, Love never failed.

On the third day, Jesus rose again, defeating death forever. The Plan God had set in motion when He crafted Eden was brought to fruition. Salvation had come for the Jews, and more.

Paul
Saul (later known as Paul), led efforts to persecute and root out the followers of Jesus Christ. He was responsible for countless Christians being imprisoned and killed. Saul wanted nothing to do with “Christus,” and he carried the full support of religious leaders of his time.

And yet, Love never failed.

Jesus appeared to Saul on the road to Damascus, and the experience sparked such total and complete transformation in Saul that he became known as Paul and dedicated the rest of his entire life to serving Jesus and supporting the growing church. He wrote many letters that comprise much of the New Testament, fulfilling the purpose God set out for him.

You and Me
So what about you, Love? Where are you in your story? Are you in the before, or the after? Wherever you find yourself, know that Love, personified in the Savior Jesus Christ, will not, no, cannot fail.

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Embracing God’s fullness in our lives is rooted in scripture and memorizing His word is vital to our continued growth and depth with Jesus. Tap and hold from your mobile device to download this week’s verse and make it your phone’s lockscreen!

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