Worship Day 13
Your Hands

Psalm 56:3
Isaiah 41:13-14
Philippians 4:6-7
John 14:27  

I have unanswered prayers
I have trouble I wish wasn’t there
And I have asked a thousand ways
That you would take my pain away
You would take my pain away

Loves. Can we all agree to set aside our shiny, polished answers and well-intentioned sound bites for a minute? Pull down your defenses and be vulnerable with me. It will be gritty. Probably painful, too. It’s okay. There is some truth we all need to hear. We will get through this together.

I am trying to understand
How to walk this weary land
Make straight the paths that crooked lie
Oh Lord before these feet of mine
Oh Lord before these feet of mine

Let’s talk about our unanswered prayers. You know the ones. Those soul-wrenching, throat-throbbing, stomach-clenching questions we wrestle with in the wee hours of the morning.

The ones that make us think we don’t really know the God we serve.
The ones that make us think we don’t really know the people we love.
The ones that even make us think we don’t really know ourselves.

Yep. Those unanswered prayers. Or, perhaps worse, the ones that make us realize we do know Him. And we know His answer, but His answer threatens to tear the veil in our heart in ways we can’t repair.

Maybe it’s the financial ruin we desperately tried to avoid, but it found us hiding and waved a pink slip in our face. Maybe it’s the parent we begged for forgiveness, but they refuse to return our calls or texts no matter how many times we reach out. Maybe it’s the abuse we didn’t want to see, but now we have and it’s here and it’s ugly and we have to make a choice. Maybe it’s the spouse who pledged to love only us, but shared their heart with another when we weren’t looking. Maybe it’s the illness we denied with everything in us, but as the days marched by and the number on the scale continued to drop, we found ourselves forced to face a reality we never wanted and aren’t sure we can handle.

Maybe it’s the daughter whose life we I begged and pleaded for God to spare, but she slipped away from us me anyway.

When my world is shaking, heaven stands
When my heart is breaking
I never leave your hands

I put off writing this for quite a while. Like, as long as humanly possible before the study started. (Sorry, Becca.) Sometimes, we put defenses in place before we consciously realize what God is actually asking of us. Sometimes, He asks us to do or say or sing or share or write things that are far bigger and harder or higher challenge than anything we would ever choose on our own… because it means being totally vulnerable in our brokenness. And sometimes, we just don’t feel brave enough.

Probably because we aren’t. Probably because I’m not.

But He is.

When you walked upon the earth
You healed the broken, lost and hurt
I know you hate to see me cry
One day you will set all things right
Yeah, one day you will set all things right

The day our firstborn arrived, we weren’t ready to meet her. It was too soon. I vividly remember gripping my husband’s hand tightly. His lips moved silently, praying. The team of doctors and nurses rushed her to the corner where the waiting equipment stood.

People from all across the country had been praying. For days. Friends who didn’t even believe in our God, crying out to Him on her behalf. Hundreds of prayers.

A flurry of activity, followed by one impossibly tiny cry. Then, silence.

When my world is shaking

My parents, praying and praying, just outside the delivery room door. So many prayers.

Heaven stands

The kind doctor grasped one of my hands in his and placed his other hand on my shoulder. Tears in his eyes.

When my heart is breaking

He shook his head. He couldn’t even get the words out. There was nothing they could do. The nurse handed her to me. An impossibly tiny person wrapped in a blanket that could have easily swaddled six of her. She had her daddy’s nose. She was perfect and beautiful and ours. She was there, until she wasn’t.

I never leave your hands

Loves, I know. The not-knowing is hard. It is so, so hard sometimes. When we are deep in our trouble and our world is shaking, we feel abandoned and alone. I get it.

But what we have to understand is that our faith is not about our feelings.
Rather, it is about Who is holding us. And the truth is that He never changes. No matter our circumstance. No matter our situation. No matter our loss.

When our worship is rooted in Who He is rather than His answers to our prayers, our reality shifts. He brings beauty from our scars, from our pain. We make room for Him to bring His Kingdom here. Through our dirt, through our trouble.

And He brings His Kingdom here. The reality of His Kingdom shows up in us, His people. When we own our faith in the hard things, this world takes notice. We are given divinely appointed opportunities to walk with people we might not otherwise walk beside. Hurting people. People in trouble.

And we are connected to them in ways that only Jesus can author.

When my world is shaking, heaven stands
When my heart is breaking
I never leave your hands

Loves, you and I, we are going to have trouble. Real, painful trouble. But do you remember what He said about trouble? “…you will have trouble, but take heart! I have overcome the world.” (John 16:33 NIV) When we set aside our feelings and choose to believe and walk in the truth of Who He is despite our trouble, we are choosing to live a life of worship, a life of faith.

And that’s exactly what we are called to do.

Your hands that shaped the world
Are holding me
They hold me still

Jesus, You are our only King and Savior. You are worthy of our worship because of Who You are. Thank You for holding us in the midst of our trouble, in our hard things.  In the middle of our not-knowing. Thank You for Your peace. Help us to remember that regardless of our feelings, our faith is rooted in the One who never sleeps. Thank You for never leaving us. We love You.

*lyrics to “Your Hands”, by JJ Heller

Share your thoughts from today’s Journey Study!
Can we pray for you?
Sign up to receive every Journey Study!