Read His Words Before Ours!
I’ve sat down several times in the last few days to convey on paper my thoughts to the lyrics of a song that I might describe as haunting (as in, poignant and evocative; difficult to ignore or forget). Little did I know that my procrastination was actually working out God’s sovereign timing. I certainly don’t condone a habit of delaying inevitable tasks, but as always God was doing something, even through my postponement.
Letting go of every single dream, I lay each one down at Your feet.
Every moment of my wandering never changes what You see.
I’ve tried to win this war, I confess.
My hands are weary, I need Your rest.
Mighty Warrior, King of the fight, no matter what I face, You’re by my side.*
On the very morning I realized I could no longer delay my writing, I was also made aware of my great need to fully embrace the truths of the song in which I had chosen to meditate. The first two words stabbed me the very moment they caught my eye.
Paul’s life and message compel us to an even more radical release of our own wills, reminding us of the most humble and genuine surrender of all through the life and death of our Lord Jesus. Philippians 2:1-11
As a mama and grandma who has kids and grandkids living thousands of miles away, I have learned that letting go is a part of life. As a foster mom, the reality of releasing hits even harder because of the massive unknown attached to it. In the past several years, I have had to let go of how I had pictured life might look and trust God with the unforeseeable future of all the children that He has placed in my care.
Laying things down that I like at my good Father’s feet is one thing.
Laying people down that I love is another.
It freshly and squarely hit me today that
letting go is always the starting point for trusting God.
On this very day, we find ourselves in a place we have never been as foster parents. We have realized that we are unable to provide everything needed for the children who have recently entered our home. The brothers who came through the door earlier this week have experienced difficulties in their lives that I’ll never fully be able to comprehend.
The neglect they have encountered is completely foreign to me.
After several days of looking at my husband with a broken heart, he confessed that he is overwhelmed and underqualified for this particular situation.
Knowing that fostering kids in need like this has to be a team effort (he is an amazing foster dad), I knew it meant we had to make a change.
I have cried and prayed.
I had to come face to face with hidden motives and agendas and plans.
I had to admit that we are not called to save every child.
We are not even called to rescue them from terrible lives.
We are only called to be faithful servants.
I confessed to God: “My hands are weary, I need Your rest.”
You are my strength and comfort. You are my steady hand.
You are my firm foundation; the rock on which I stand.
Your ways are always higher. Your plans are always good.
There’s not a place where I’ll go, You’ve not already stood.*
Sometimes I do the right thing.
Sometimes I do the right thing for the right reason.
And sometimes I do the right thing for the right reason, but with a skewed view of God.
I forget that He alone is capable of doing what is perfectly good.
Only He knows what tomorrow brings.
I may have good intentions in the spiritual battle I’m fighting,
but if I don’t recognize that He is the King of the fight,
I begin to fight for outcomes and answers
rather than fighting for faith.
As I cry out to Him, I too often hold on to a false hope in my own ability to fix and heal.
Only when I let go of all my pre-conceived notions of what should happen am I able to fully trust Him.
My faith cannot be in the moving mountains or the parting waters,
though He is able to do those things, Exodus 14, Mk 11:22-24
rather my trust is to be completely in Him, not in what He does.
When You don’t move the mountains I’m needing You to move;
when You don’t part the waters I wish I could walk through;
when You don’t give the answers as I cry out to You, I will trust.*
The Psalmist communicates so clearly again and again that our trust must be solidly placed in only One Person.
HE is our strength and comfort.
HE is our steady hand.
HE is our firm foundation.
HE is our rock.
HE is exalted.
I am unable to fully explain how much I needed the truths of this song to permeate my heart and mind today. Letting these kids go is so difficult.
What is the Father calling you to let go of and trust Him with?
Lord, “Truth is, You know what tomorrow brings. There’s not a day ahead You have not seen. So, in all things be my life and breath. I want what You want, Lord, and nothing else.
I will trust in You.”*
*song lyrics by Lauren Daigle, “Trust In You”
Embracing God’s fullness in our lives is rooted in scripture and memorizing His word is vital to our continued growth and depth with Jesus. Tap and hold from your mobile device to download this week’s verse and make it your phone’s lockscreen!