I try so hard to keep my busyness at bay.
I practice saying “No” to many things and try keep my projects to a minimum…
but slowly the chaos has crept back in.
This time it has disguised itself as buying a home, moving, never ending doctor appointments, and mostly, motherhood.
And, for me, excuses always piggyback busyness.
“Too much else to do.”
And before I know it, I’m thirsty.
My throat is dry.
My voice is raspy.
The smallest flicker will light me ablaze.
As the deer panteth for the water
So my soul longeth after You
With hot tears I remember why I am thirsty.
It is so simple, and yet I make it seem so complicated.
Like when I’m working on a project and need a drink of something cool and refreshing. I could stop at any point and go get a drink, but I don’t. I keep working while the thought of my parched mouth consumes me. How silly is that? The answer is literally steps away!
My soul is spiritually parched and I need a cool, refreshing drink.
The answer is simple and satisfying, just moments away, but I don’t solve my problem.
You alone are my heart’s desire
And I long to worship Thee
I long for a drink. I long to be filled. I long to sit and worship my King. My heart’s desire truly is to sit and worship Him. To just be.
To press pause on the busyness. To let go of the chaos.
But my actions prove different priorities.
You alone are my strength my shield
To you alone may my spirit yield
If He is my only source for my strength, no wonder I am weak.
If He shields me from the things the world tries to throw at me,
no wonder I’ve felt hit and bruised.
And for Him my spirit now yields, my world slows, my busyness stops.
You’re my friend and You are my brother
Even though you are a King
I love you more than any other
So much more than anything
My King. My Great, Almighty King who has the power to breathe life and is the Lord of all things, you are also my friend. My unchanging, never failing, friend. The friend who has the ability to grab my face, point it upwards, and say, “Child, you’ve got to slow your life down.”
The friend who doesn’t demand my time, but longs for it.
The friend who deserves all of my worship, but doesn’t stop loving me when I fail to give it.
I know I love Him, but I don’t always show Him.
“Lord, I love You. I love you so much more than anything.”
I want you more than gold or silver
Only You can satisfy
You alone are the real joy giver
And the apple of my eye
I want Him more than I want a pretty home.
I want Him more than I want my walls to be gray or my kids to eat food made from scratch
(the things I typically busy myself with).
Those things feel nice, it feels incredible to walk into a home that I love, but they can’t replace God. Hustle and bustle will never quench my thirst.
Even quiet moments won’t satisfy if He isn’t part of them.
God, and only God, gives joy.
Sometimes He gives it through my sweet children, or through peaceful mornings with my family. Sometimes He gives it through relaxing moments with my husband, or when laughter fills our house. But the joy is there because of the Almighty.
He is the giver of joy.
He is the giver of love.
He is the giver of living water.
So, I sit, and allow myself to drink. Long, deep gulps of the living water. But while doing so, I am reminded that I need to be drinking daily, or I will find myself where I was just before – thirsty and faint.
You alone are my heart’s desire
And I long to worship Thee.
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