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Questions 2 Day 2 Let’s Party: Digging Deeper

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Digging Deeper Days

Finding the original intent of Scripture and making good application to our everyday lives as we become equipped to correctly handle the Word of Truth!

Yesterday’s Journey Study connects with today’s!
Check out Let’s Party!

The Questions

1) Who is speaking in this passage and why would they test themselves with pleasure? (verse 1)

2) What is significant about the author’s pleasures he chose to indulge in? (verses 3-8)

3) What was the author’s conclusion of pursuing pleasure? (verses 9-11)

Ecclesiastes 2:1-11

I said to myself, “Go ahead, I will test you with pleasure; enjoy what is good.” But it turned out to be futile. 2 I said about laughter, “It is madness,” and about pleasure, “What does this accomplish?” 3 I explored with my mind the pull of wine on my body—my mind still guiding me with wisdom—and how to grasp folly, until I could see what is good for people to do under heaven during the few days of their lives.

4 I increased my achievements. I built houses and planted vineyards for myself. 5 I made gardens and parks for myself and planted every kind of fruit tree in them. 6 I constructed reservoirs for myself from which to irrigate a grove of flourishing trees. 7 I acquired male and female servants and had slaves who were born in my house. I also owned livestock—large herds and flocks—more than all who were before me in Jerusalem. 8 I also amassed silver and gold for myself, and the treasure of kings and provinces. I gathered male and female singers for myself, and many concubines, the delights of men. 9 So I became great and surpassed all who were before me in Jerusalem; my wisdom also remained with me. 10 All that my eyes desired, I did not deny them. I did not refuse myself any pleasure, for I took pleasure in all my struggles. This was my reward for all my struggles. 11 When I considered all that I had accomplished and what I had labored to achieve, I found everything to be futile and a pursuit of the wind. There was nothing to be gained under the sun.

Original Intent

1) Who is speaking in this passage and why would they test themselves with pleasure? (verse 1)
Often, the beginning of a biblical book provides us with its place in the timeline of history, which is extremely important to correctly understanding it in its cultural setting, as well as stating the author’s name along with, generally, some idea of their career or place in society. Ecclesiastes 1:1 does not disappoint and reveals this book contains “The words of the Teacher, son of David, King of Jerusalem.” While David had multiple sons, the fact the author noted himself as “King of Jerusalem” narrows the possible authors down to 1, Solomon. (1 Kings 1:15-30) Solomon, the son of King David, was given the throne on David’s death, but was also given vast wisdom, keen understanding, and riches beyond measure by the Lord. (1 Kings 3:5-14) This gift from God’s wisdom granted Solomon insight into all manner of areas including kingly reign, justice, human relationships, and even scientific exploration that was radically advanced for his day. However, God didn’t give Solomon all wisdom, rather He allowed Solomon’s wisdom to pair with curiosity, which gave him the gift of exploring life in deeper ways. When Solomon “said to (himself), “Go ahead, I will test you with pleasure; enjoy what is good” (verse 1), it comes on the heels of the closing of chapter 1:12-18, where we find Solomon had deeply explored wisdom and understanding to find the purpose and fullest satisfaction of life. Having explored book learning and human interaction and hard work and finding them all “a pursuit of the wind” (verse 17), he turns his attention to pleasure to find the source of lasting satisfaction.

2) What is significant about the author’s pleasures he chose to indulge in? (verses 3-8)
Self-seeking. Every single one of Solomon’s pleasures he chose to envelope himself within hinged upon himself. What could make him happy, or happiest? This was his pursuit, and the list is quite lengthy. Wine and the alluring pull of alcohol, he tried it. (verse 3) Hard work and accomplishment, he invested long hours and much money. (verses 4-5) He tried his hand at civil engineering and architecture. (verse 6) He lived in the lap of luxury to the nth degree, nothing was out of his reach. He wanted for nothing and acquired so many slaves that his every wish was their command. (verses 7-8) The finest entertainment was available at his demand whether it was the arts or sexual fulfillment. (verse 8) Solomon created an environment where he was the center. Not one thing on his lengthy list of impressive wealth accumulations, status, power, and access to pleasure was earmarked for the disposal of anyone but himself. Pleasure, with its attractive power, exclusively tugs one person into its gravitational pull, leaving all others out. Pleasure is about one person, self, and Solomon certainly experienced this reality as he explored the source of true and lasting satisfaction.

3) What was the author’s conclusion of pursuing pleasure? (verses 9-11)
Literally everything was accessible to Solomon as he stated, “I did not refuse myself any pleasure” (verse 10), with the exception of one. Satisfaction. In the end, all of his years of pleasure seeking were summed up by his own words, “When I considered all that I had accomplished and what I had labored to achieve, I found everything to be futile and a pursuit of the wind. There was nothing to be gained under the sun.” (verse 11) The only reward was the momentary pleasure his pursuits brought him at that time, but nothing that lasted. “I took pleasure in all my struggles. This was my reward for all my struggles.” (verse 10) Permanent pleasure was not compatible with the ever-elusive satisfaction Solomon sought. The king observed everyone around him pursuing pleasure, yet, once he did the same, he walked away with the wise understanding that nothing satisfied for everything was fleeting like “pursuing the wind”. (verse 11)

Everyday Application

1) Who is speaking in this passage and why would they test themselves with pleasure? (verse 1)
One of the most common questions every human heart asks is, “What is my purpose?”. Solomon, even with all of his wisdom, asked the same question and explored many avenues to discover true, lasting happiness and purpose. While he had studied wisdom and book learning and how people live out their lives, he found it all to be repetitive and, in the end, meaningless. What things have you pursued in order to find true satisfaction? Maybe you’ve invested time, energy, and resources, all with the hope of finally being happy and finding a purpose that doesn’t fade away. I know I have, many times in many ways. I’ve spent the majority of my married years placing my identity and focused energy in my kids and in working to manage (err, manipulate, actually) my husband into loving me and responding to me in the way that makes me the happiest and most satisfied. Not only did my attempt to find lasting happiness in my marriage and kids prove to be utterly unsuccessful by my own manipulation, it also was (yes, caught me again, still is) incredibly un-loving. No relationship will ever be able to satisfy me. No amount of pleasure found through any source will have the endurance to sustain my unquenchable desire to be perfectly and continuously happy. Solomon wrote Ecclesiastes to lay out his research and his conclusion was that only in God do we find out greatest delight. Jesus reiterated this truth when He said, “I have come so they may have life and have it in abundance.” (John 10:10) For me, I’ve found this to be abundantly true as well. Only when I shift my eyes off trying to wring pleasure out of my relationships and onto Jesus, have I found long-lasting and sweetly satisfying delight in both Jesus and my human relationships. Only Jesus offers satisfaction that lasts, truly everything else is meaningless in comparison.

2) What is significant about the author’s pleasures he chose to indulge in? (verses 3-8)
Solomon explored many different types of pleasure. Perhaps some of them are specifically tempting to you, or maybe none of them, but every human being longs to find delight and be satisfied in something. Solomon’s list of delights was lengthy and specific. I wonder what might fill your list if you were to specifically name them. I challenged myself to do this and was surprised at how easy it was to not only create a very specific list, but also how defensive and quick to justify my choices I became as I called them out by name.  A clean house. No wait. A clean house that someone else cleans. My internal voice continued with a decently good justification for this desire, “I actually pretty much deserve someone else to clean my house. I’ve maintained our home for 19 years, without a break. And my husband never seems to jump in and help me anyways. In fact, I need someone to clean for me. Think of all the other things I could do! Like, nap instead of pick up after others. Maybe someone else could cook for me too….” How quickly my focus became myself to the exclusion, and even demeaning of others, as I thought of how to please myself. One self-serving desire led straight to another without any hinderance at all. The whole practice was a little disconcerting, honestly. This pursuit of self-seeking pleasure runs in direct contradiction to the call of Jesus. He says that to follow Him, we must deny ourselves. (Luke 9:23) Just as there isn’t one thing in Solomon’s list that lent itself to sacrifice for another, neither did my list, and I’m guessing your honest list, if given free reign, wouldn’t include others either. Self-seeking pleasure and sacrifice live in constant opposition.

3) What was the author’s conclusion of pursuing pleasure? (verses 9-11)
If you take the challenge to read through the relatively short book of Ecclesiastes, you’ll find King Solomon’s concluding refrain of “nothing to be gained under the sun” repeated often as he studies the intricacies of life, relationships, work, academics, and pursuits of all kinds. The whole book can feel melancholy and a bit dismal, which should be taken to heart by all of us. At the beginning of his reign, King Solomon submitted himself to the wisdom of God, recognizing his own human failings and weaknesses, especially in light of the vast endlessness of the Almighty. (1 Kings 3:7-9) This position, Solomon later wrote, is the beginning of wisdom. True wisdom. (Proverbs 1:7) Wisdom that says only the Lord can bring lasting delight. Solomon was right, there really is nothing new under the sun. If we look at our possessions and our pursuits, and even our relationships, and then cast our eyes to eternity, we should shudder in our shoes. Nothing new under the sun. Everything will fade away except the Word of the Lord. (Isaiah 40:8) What will actually last forever? What is worth giving ourselves for? Jesus. Pursuing Jesus. When we surrender the whole of our everything to Him, and Him alone, He fills us with good things. (Matthew 7:11) Delightful things. Satisfyingly sweet things. Things that won’t entangle our hearts, tempting us to love ourselves more than our Savior as long as we fix our eyes on Christ alone. So, Sister, having studied this wise, ancient king, I’m thinking about the things I can start dethroning from my must-have-pleasure-list so I can give my everything to the Only King worthy of my everything. What about you?

What do YOU think?! Share Here!
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Digging Deeper is for Everyone!

1) Take this passage (or any other passage).
2) Read it, and the verses around it,
several times
3) Write down your questions
as you think of them.
4) Ask specific culture related questions and be ready to dig around for your answers. Google them, use www.studylight.org, or look them up in a study Bible and read the footnotes (click on the little letters next to a word and it will show you
other related verses!). (www.esvbible.org)
5) Check your applications with other trusted Christians that you are in community with and embrace the fullness of God
in your everyday!

Digging Deeper Community

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Why Dig Deeper?

Finding the original meaning is a huge deal when we study Scripture and can make all the difference in our understanding as we apply God’s truths to our everyday lives.

In our modern-day relationships, we want people to understand our original intention as we communicate; how much more so between God and humanity?!

Here’s a little bit more on why we take Digging Deeper so seriously.

Study Tools

We love getting help while we study and www.studylight.org is one of many excellent resources, providing the original Hebrew (Old Testament) or Greek (New Testament) with an English translation.

Want to know more about a specific word in a verse? Click on “Strong’s Interlinear Bible” then click the word you’d like to study. Discover “origin”, “definition” and hear the original pronunciation – That Is Awesome!

Want more background? Click “Study Tools”, then pick a few commentaries to read their scholarly approach, keeping in mind that just because a commentary says it, doesn’t mean it’s true. (just like the internet :-))

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The GT Weekend! ~ Reveal Week 1

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The GT Weekend!

At Gracefully Truthful, weekends aren’t for “checking out”.
Use this time to invite the Almighty’s fullness into you life in a deeper way!
Saturdays and Sundays are a chance to
reflect, rest, and re-center our lives onto Christ.
Don’t miss the opportunity to connect with other women in prayer,
rest your soul in reflective journaling,
and spend time worshiping the Creator who
longs for intimacy with each of us!

Worship Through Journaling

Worship Through Journaling

1) 2020. The year that will be forever marked with loss for many, and confusion and chaos for nearly all of us. In what ways has the Covid-19 pandemic gripped you with loss? Even the loss of normalcy significantly impacts each of us in different ways around the globe. Together, we share in this experience of loss. Maybe for you, just seeing the word loss makes your eyes swim with tears. Perhaps you’ve dreaded this Christmas season because the weight of absence feels impossibly heavy. We often move into the tendency to manage how we feel about loss rather than deal with it, allowing it to become part of who we are. What would it look like for you to acknowledge your loss this December? What if, instead of trying to stomp out the embers of ache and emptiness, we allowed them to swirl around us unhindered. What might the Lord Jesus reveal about our hearts, and our always constant need for Him, in the light of those flickers of brilliant loss? Make space this weekend to journal about your emptiness and aching places as you walk into December. Weep and be held by the Lord of Life and let Him comfort you.

2) Heartache isn’t a word we love to talk or write about with languishing love. The very word signifies we have traveled a long path, a weary one, a wounding one.  While most of us can easily describe some of our past experiences as bringing burdening ache to our hearts, we don’t often consider the heartache of God. Jesus came as a squalling babe in a rough manger, experiencing our heartache from the moment His holy lungs breathed their first earthly breath. Then, hanging on a cruel cross, knowing your sin and mine was being paid for in His righteous flesh, His heart continued breaking for us to come near and know His peace. As we walk through suffering, often made raw again at Christmas, be reminded the Savior knows you deeply. Pen the words of Psalm 90:14 on a card and make it a visible reminder to ask the Lord to satisfy you with His love this Christmas!

3) Ancient King Solomon wisely summarized, “Hope delayed makes the heart sick, but desire fulfilled is a tree of life.” (Proverbs 13:12) What have you waited for? I mean, really waited for? A baby? A husband? A healthy marriage? A new position at work? Peace in relationships? Joy to return? Israel waited for the One promised by God to come and free them, but their expectations were so far off they missed the Savior entirely, even crucifying Him. I know I’ve done the same thing with my longings. For nearly two decades, I longed for my husband to act a certain way within our marriage. As Solomon wrote, I was indeed “heart sick”, but God graciously revealed how many good qualities I had missed completely because I wanted my “hoped for” to look as I expected. As I shifted my gaze to the Giver of all things, He opened my eyes to so much more! What if we each decided to surrender our hopes and dreams to the God who perfectly fulfills every heart that trusts in Him?!

Praying Scripture back to the One who wrote it in the first place is a great way to jump start our prayer-life! Pray this passage from Luke 1:78-79 back to the Lord and
let His Spirit speak to you through it!

Because of our God’s merciful compassion,
the dawn from on high will visit us to shine on those who live in darkness
and the shadow of death, to guide our feet into the way of peace.

Prayer Journal
Ah Lord God, my view of myself and my circumstance is often so magnified compared to how I view You. I forget You are sovereign. I forget You are loving, good, and always for me. Oh Lord, I do believe You, help my unbelief! (Mark 9:24) Sometimes, I think of those shepherds on that first Christmas, or of Mary and Joseph, all of whom saw angels with their own eyes, and heard glorious tidings of good news! How easy it must have been to believe them! I forget, Lord, how long they had waited as an entire people for Your coming. How many times had they doubted? Even in the middle of Your very presence in their lives, how often did the “ordinary” feel too mundane to be holy? Seep my heart in Your presence so deeply, Holy Spirit, that I begin to see my regular life from Your vantage point. I wait for much, yet You are never delayed nor out of touch. I grieve, yet I know You hold every tear in Your safekeeping. I’ve lost much, but I know redemption is Your good work. Though I cry out, “how long, Lord?” and beg You to “turn and have compassion on Your servant”, “let Your work be seen by your servants and Your splendor by their children.” You alone are holy, sovereign, and always love, and I praise You!

Worship Through Community

Can we pray for you? Reach Out! We’d love to pray for and with you!
Send us an email at prayer@gracefullytruthful.com

Build community, be transparent, and encourage others:
Share how God spoke to you today!
Comment Here or in our Facebook Community Group!

Worship Through Prayer

Worship Through Music

The GT Weekend! ~ Beloved Week 3

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The GT Weekend!

At Gracefully Truthful, weekends aren’t for “checking out”.
Use this time to invite the Almighty’s fullness into you life in a deeper way!
Saturdays and Sundays are a chance to
reflect, rest, and re-center our lives onto Christ.
Don’t miss the opportunity to connect with other women in prayer,
rest your soul in reflective journaling,
and spend time worshiping the Creator who
longs for intimacy with each of us!

Worship Through Journaling

Worship Through Journaling

1) When you think of God and sexual intimacy, what are your first responses? Pulling away? Shame? Closeness and delight? Gratitude? How we respond to the idea of God and sex reveals what we believe about our Creator and intimacy with us. As you unpack your beliefs in this area, take the challenge to read through Song of Solomon aloud. Spend some time praying beforehand, asking God to open your heart to understand His desire for oneness and delight in marriage. The world, and our enemy Satan, would have us believe that sex is dirty, embarrassing, and anything but sacred. Whether you are single or married, all of us have room to grow in elevating our view of the holiness of marriage and sexual intimacy. As you finish reading through Song of Solomon, write down the truths that most arrested your attention. Ask the Lord to keep expanding your understanding of these rich truths!

2) We all love the thrilling feelings of soaring excitement when relationships begin or when we finally say, “I do.” It’s the after when the excitement fades, disagreements arise, and suddenly, the glorious feelings we once felt towards the one person we vowed to love are nowhere to be found. Stacy shares of her euphoria at the beginning, only to watch it fade to mundane and lackluster in the after. A million and one distractions tempt us away from growing in love and maturity with our spouse, and if we aren’t on guard, these can quickly fuel entitlement in relationship effectively driving a wedge between two who were once inseparable. If you’re married, some ways your spouse has become distracted and entitled are probably already popping into your mind! But, turn it around and ask the Spirit to show you how you are becoming disengaged and entitled as well. Thank Him for showing you these, then ask for His power to flee the temptation to run towards these and run away instead. Single friends, consider the idols you run towards most often to distract you from hard or messy things. What patterns do you notice about yourself when you are feeling unloved or unaccepted in your relationships? Take these to the Lord and ask Him to show you His rich redemptive work in your life!

3) Give yourself permission to have some space in your day to be still and reflective. Maybe you lock your closet or your bathroom door, or maybe “quiet” needs to look like your kids are loud. Just make the space! Close your eyes, take some deep breaths and consider what it has felt like, or what it might feel like, to have someone sing over you who knows you deeply, wholly, and without condition or judgement. What words would they choose to set to melody? What would their voice sound like? What characteristics would they eagerly highlight about you? What might they say about their own love toward you? What if this was the Lord’s voice over you; how might your heart respond? Pause here and take in these feelings without discounting them or brushing them aside. Beloved, how deeply the Lord loves to love you! Breathe in this truth and let His voice sing over you with bold declaration! Stay here as long you need, then as your time closes, ask the Lord specifically who you can sing over. Whether it’s with true musical melodies or it’s just a spoken word of truth, woven with life-giving love, be willing and ready to extend a song of love over whoever the Lord brings to mind!

Praying Scripture back to the One who wrote it in the first place is a great way to jump start our prayer-life! Pray this passage from Zephaniah 3:17 back to the Lord and
let His Spirit speak to you through it!

The Lord your God is among you,
a warrior who saves.
He will rejoice over you with gladness.
He will be quiet in his love.
He will delight in you with singing.”

Prayer Journal
Your love truly is matchless, oh Lord, my Savior and my God. Your love is as mighty as an ocean wave at every single moment of my life. When I feel alone in my relationships as friend, daughter, mother, or wife, You “send Your faithful love by day and at night Your song is with me.” (Psalm 42:8) No one else offers steadfast constancy like You. Forgive me, oh Abba, for the many times I choose to hinge my delight on another’s love and care for me instead of yours. Never will Your love change or disappoint; remind me to listen for Your love song regardless of feelings. Make me aware, Holy Spirit, of the countless distractions pulling me away from You, the Only One who loves me perfectly and completely. Empower me to turn my eyes from worthless things, focusing on You as complete satisfier of my every need. As I practice turning and looking in full at You and Your word, teach me how to love others selflessly with the same humility You model towards me. I love You, Lord Jesus, heal my relationships and use me as a conduit of Your love.

Worship Through Community

Can we pray for you? Reach Out! We’d love to pray for and with you!
Send us an email at prayer@gracefullytruthful.com

Build community, be transparent, and encourage others:
Share how God spoke to you today!
Comment Here or in our Facebook Community Group!

Worship Through Prayer

Worship Through Music

Beloved Day 12 Seasons Of Love: Digging Deeper

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Digging Deeper Days

Finding the original intent of Scripture and making good application to our everyday lives as we become equipped to correctly handle the Word of Truth!

Yesterday’s Journey Study connects with today’s!
Check out Seasons Of Love!

The Questions

1) Why might the woman have paused before opening the door to her loved one (verse 3)?

2) Why did the man not continue to wait for her to open the door (verse 6)?

3) Verse 7 seems to indicate abuse of the woman. What might be the significance of this being included in the passage?

4) How does the woman express her disappointment of not finding her loved one? (verse 8)

Song of Solomon 5:3-8

3 I have taken off my clothing. How can I put it back on? I have washed my feet. How can I get them dirty? 4 My love thrust his hand through the opening, and my feelings were stirred for him. 5 I rose to open for my love. My hands dripped with myrrh, my fingers with flowing myrrh on the handles of the bolt. 6 I opened to my love, but my love had turned and gone away. My heart sank because he had left. I sought him, but did not find him. I called him, but he did not answer.

7 The guards who go about the city found me. They beat and wounded me; they took my cloak from me—the guardians of the walls. 8 Young women of Jerusalem, I charge you, if you find my love, tell him that I am lovesick.

Original Intent

1) Why might the woman have paused before opening the door to her loved one (verse 3)?
Since this book is not a chronological account of the events between Solomon and his beloved, there are some difficult passages to unravel. This one is no exception. In verse 2 of the chapter, we read the bride’s words, “I was sleeping, but my heart was awake.” As in chapter 3 verse 1, we are left with questions about the sequence and the reality of the couple’s actions in this scene. Is the young woman dreaming, or is she at the drowsy verge of being awakened? Since many Bible commentators have come to different conclusions, it seems unnecessary to dwell too long in a discussion about this. More importantly is the big picture. In these verses we encounter a scenario of a real-life relationship which included human responses. The young woman knows her loved one is at the door, but she is either too tired or too lazy to get up, get dressed, and open the door for him. David Guzik says, “her problem was not that she didn’t go to the door; but that she did it so slowly and reluctantly, making excuses all along the way. [This reveals she was] thinking only about her comfort and not at all about Solomon’s desires or her relationship with him.” (enduringword.com)

2) Why did the man not continue to wait for her to open the door (verse 6)?
The woman’s lover reminded her that he was standing on the outside waiting. “Open to me, my sister, my darling, my dove, my perfect one. For my head is drenched with dew, my hair with droplets of the night.” (verse 2) Whether or not the terms in verse 4 are explicit references regarding sexual intimacy, the scene certainly portrays an active pursuit of one lover desiring to be with the other, but being met with rejection. I think the best interpretation is to read this within the framework Guzik describes as a “missed connection” between the bride and groom, and therefore we should apply it literally rather than symbolically. (enduringword.com) The groom has been waiting patiently outside the door of the bride’s room. As he was leaving, he likely placed myrrh on the door handle as was customary in ancient settings. We are not given the reasons why the woman paused, but the delay causes her beloved to leave. It does not appear he was angry with her, and the emphasis again seems to be on the passion of the bride once she realizes his loving gesture. The bride’s emotions are awakened and she has legitimate feelings of despair because her loved one can’t be found.

3) Verse 7 seems to indicate abuse of the woman. What might be the significance of this being included in the passage?
In chapter 3 we read how the watchmen were helpful to the woman as she frantically sought her beloved. But now verse 7 seems so out of place. What is happening? In then-current day, there were two sorts of watchmen in a city. One guarded from the inside of a city wall to ensure all those within were safe and secure. The others were placed on the walls themselves to watch and give notice of an enemy approaching. (Bible Study Tools, David Gill) The watchmen on the wall would be aware that the only women who would be on the streets at night were prostitutes. Not realizing who she is, they treat her with inappropriate disregard, even abusing her. Whether a dream or reality, we surely feel the stab to our hearts as we read what the bride endured as she runs out into the night. She so desires to find the one she loves that she risks her wellbeing to search for him. Nothing is mentioned about her response to what she experiences, but we share her anguish over not finding her groom. These verses are communicating unrelenting passion and desire between a bride and her groom at all costs.

4) How does the woman express her disappointment of not finding her loved one? (verse 8)
We have read in the previous chapters how the couple speaks to one another with words describing their longing for, and their satisfaction in, one another. Here in verse 8, the bride begins to plead with the women of the town to help her find her groom. It appears she has deep regret over her rejection of his advances, and she now wants to let him know how much she longs for him.  In Song of Solomon 2:4-6, the bride expresses her soul’s desire toward her new groom in those pleasant moments of marital intimacy and passion. She was overwhelmed by the presence of love and the joy of lovemaking. Here in chapter 5, the young woman aches over the distance she has created with her beloved. She has become physically and emotionally ill due to her yearning love for him. She asks the city’s women to “tell him that I am lovesick.” The Septuagint (the Greek translation of the Hebrew OT) uses the verb titrosko which means inflicted with a wound, injured, damaged. The Shulamite woman is emotionally and physically overwrought. (preceptaustin.org) Within the context, we can surmise she is craving more moments with the groom. She grieves the way she let him slip away due to her unwillingness to respond when he came to her.

Everyday Application

1) Why might the woman have paused before opening the door to her loved one (verse 3)?
We don’t know all the motives behind why the bride doesn’t go to the door. She expresses it would be somewhat of a hassle since she has already changed clothes, whether it is weariness or laziness, we are not sure. What we discover as we read further in the passage, though, is that she regrets her inaction to open the door to her beloved. While there will be times in marriage that one person lacks a desire to make much effort toward intimacy (due to fatigue or distress), we should not make it a habit to neglect our spouse’s need for sexual and physical closeness. This will likely require ongoing conversation and work in our relationships as we strive for a healthy marriage. As we think about this in spiritual terms, we can also pray for our hearts to be receptive to our Beloved Savior. Bible teacher Harry Ironside says this is a great picture of our own callousness toward Divine Love. “When [Christ] comes to the heart’s door we practically say, ‘No; it is inconvenient. I do not want to drop things right now.’” What an even greater tragedy to reject God’s perfect love. (John 3:16-19)

2) Why did the man not continue to wait for her to open the door (verse 6)?
The bottom line of this verse is how the groom was demonstrating his desire for his bride. He was patient. He did not force his way in, nor did he demand her to meet his expectations. Instead, he waited and then quietly slipped away, but not before leaving a symbol of his love. What beautiful restraint and gentleness was shown by this man. Although his loved one did not receive him in the way he expected, he chose kindness. Putting a fragrance on the bolt handles would have been akin to leaving flowers by the door. Sometimes in marriage we don’t feel the emotional attachment to our husband. When that happens, we can begin by praying for God to stir passion in us. Years ago, I heard a woman Bible teacher talk about how she prayed for her marriage. She said one of her prayers was that she would “always thrill to her husband’s touch.” That is a good start! Whether we are the initiator or the one waiting, our goal should be to demonstrate unrelenting love. Friend, maybe you feel that any sign of promising light is so far in the distance you are unable to see it. I pray you will not lose hope. God will be faithful as you pursue a passionate and lasting marriage.

3) Verse 7 seems to indicate abuse of the woman. What might be the significance of this being included in the passage?
The picture of the beloved bride of the king being assaulted by his own watchmen is appalling! Whether she is dreaming or is in fact walking around at night like a prostitute, she is a desperate woman in search of the one her heart longs to be near. She has felt the pangs of dismissing her lover’s kind and patient pursuit. It has been said that “absence makes the heart grow fonder.” I doubt that is always true as I have seen absence push people apart. But one of the ways we can create a healthy kind of distance that inspires desire is to rehearse the benefits of being married to our husband. When marriages are struggling, it is hard to find the good in the other person. Our human tendency is to rehearse our weariness with it all. As we do, we only add to our growing list of reasons not to make efforts. However, when alone with our thoughts, considering the good things of our marriage and the positive characteristics of our husbands helps stir our emotions toward desire. As the bride longed to find her beloved groom, God can restore our passions as we pray and work to bridge the gap we may or may not have caused.

4) How does the woman express her disappointment of not finding her loved one? (verse 8)
The Shulamite woman had gone from being “too tired” to being “lovesick.” She desperately went searching for the one her heart so deeply loved. She called those around her to join her in her search. Sister, enlist your own army of women to support you in your marriage. No, I’m not asking you to find friends to whom you can badmouth your husband. I am encouraging you to gather those around you who will remind you to “love your husbands … so God’s word will not be slandered.” (Titus 2:4) It is not an easy journey, this thing called marriage. But with God’s help, and with friends pointing us to Christ, we can pursue the kind of passionate relationship we read of in Song of Solomon!

What do YOU think?! Share Here!
Missing the connection to our other Journey Study?
Catch up with Seasons Of Love!

Digging Deeper is for Everyone!

1) Take this passage (or any other passage).
2) Read it, and the verses around it,
several times
3) Write down your questions
as you think of them.
4) Ask specific culture related questions and be ready to dig around for your answers. Google them, use www.studylight.org, or look them up in a study Bible and read the footnotes (click on the little letters next to a word and it will show you
other related verses!). (www.esvbible.org)
5) Check your applications with other trusted Christians that you are in community with and embrace the fullness of God
in your everyday!

Digging Deeper Community

Share What You’ve Learned!
Pray Together!
Join us in the GT Facebook Community!

Our Current Study Theme!

This is Beloved Week Three!
Don’t miss out on the discussion!
Sign up to receive every GT Journey Study!

Why Dig Deeper?

Finding the original meaning is a huge deal when we study Scripture and can make all the difference in our understanding as we apply God’s truths to our everyday lives.

In our modern-day relationships, we want people to understand our original intention as we communicate; how much more so between God and humanity?!

Here’s a little bit more on why we take Digging Deeper so seriously.

Study Tools

We love getting help while we study and www.studylight.org is one of many excellent resources, providing the original Hebrew (Old Testament) or Greek (New Testament) with an English translation.

Want to know more about a specific word in a verse? Click on “Strong’s Interlinear Bible” then click the word you’d like to study. Discover “origin”, “definition” and hear the original pronunciation – That Is Awesome!

Want more background? Click “Study Tools”, then pick a few commentaries to read their scholarly approach, keeping in mind that just because a commentary says it, doesn’t mean it’s true. (just like the internet :-))

Memorize It!

Download this week’s verse and make it your phone’s lockscreen!
Tap and hold on your mobile device to save.

Beloved Day 10 Satisfaction Of The Beloved

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Read His Words Before Ours!

1 Corinthians 13:4-13
Song of Solomon 2:8-17
1 Corinthians 2:1-16

Beloved, Day 10

Lights on.
Clothes off.
Covers gone.
Nothing hidden.
exposed and known tied together in a single moment.

Will there be acceptance?
Does shame live here?
Does love?

I’m not a movie junky, and I rarely watch TV, but even for me, there’s something achingly sweet in watching a romantic comedy. Whatever the couple’s circumstances that pull at my heart strings, the winding path to resolution finds me swooning and cheering for the blissful couple as their “happily ever after” comes into view and the credits roll.

It’s easy to cheer on a fictitious couple on the screen, it’s quite another to live out a happy ending in real life, where expectation, desire, and satisfaction rarely align.

As a teenager, I was drawn in by the love story of Song of Solomon. I would read every word, imagining how fantastic it would be to be the Beloved of a man who seemed entirely intent on loving me.

How beautiful you are, my Love! How pleasant! (Song of Solomon 1:15)
I am my Love’s, and his desire is for me. (Song of Solomon 7:10)
You have captured my heart with one glance of your eyes. (Song of Solomon 4:9)

Surely, if I prayed intently enough, waiting for just the right one, the Lord would give me this Happily Ever After kind of man who would pen erotic poems about the delights of my body. I would feel loved, and full; content and never wanting for anything.

Your lips are like a scarlet cord,
and your mouth is lovely. (Song of Solomon 4:3)
How beautiful are your sandaled feet, princess!
The curves of your thighs are like jewelry,
the handiwork of a master. (…)
Your belly is a mound of wheat
surrounded by lilies.
Your breasts are like two fawns,
twins of a gazelle. (Song of Solomon 7:1-3, emphasis mine)

Turns out, real life was rather, um, less than.
I do remember my new husband reading Song of Solomon one night after he prepared a hot bath, but as for bright lights and clothes off, I’m always looking for the blanket and maybe, m a y b e, a candle for a light. Otherwise, pitch black works great; it’s good for sleeping and any other activity.

It would seem I actually have a lot of shame I’d rather keep under wraps. Plenty of uncertainty whispers in the corners of my heart, asking if my Lover actually loves me for me. Then, apparently, I have quite a few expectations I didn’t realize I carried, which has led to heaps of disappointment and even anger. These are also things I’d rather keep cocooned in the dark.

For over half my life, I’ve known, and loved, my husband, and he has known and loved me.
We’ve both done the best we could, given the people we were, the maturity we had, and what we knew of love and relationships. We’re now 19 years in to this mysterious covenant love we share, but, can I tell you a secret?

I only started feeling truly satisfied when I began loving my Maker first and most.
There was a time in my marriage, where the pain of disappointment and the heavy ache of never enough grew impossible to bear. It was then, I dared something new.
I took the Lord as my Husband.

I very intentionally decided Christ would have my everything, and I would look to Him alone to find my fullest satisfaction. Being a Christian was one thing, but committing to knowing Jesus as my covenant Bridegroom was another, especially in the deep wake of disappointment in my flesh and blood marriage.

It began simply, with my open Bible, a journal page, a pen, and an awkward few sentences signaling the beginning of a commitment to meet with the Lord God every single day and pray for my husband.

Over time, the woes I had with my man faded
as Christ became most and best of what I wanted.
Instead of bemoaning all the ways my man wasn’t,
I was drawn in by all Jesus was.

As I invested in my relationship with God, His Spirit reshaped my heart to see my husband differently and love him better. Sisters, when it comes to loving my man, I have an inexpressibly long ways to go, but I also know the Lord has made me new in ways I’d never dreamed possible, and He’s made my husband new too.

Want to know another secret?
My husband’s transformation took a radical shift when He decided
Jesus needed to be His one and only love as well.

He was convicted by Jesus’ words in Revelation,
“I have this against you, you have forgotten your first love”. (Revelation 2:4)
As he sat on a mountain, he was stunned by the sheer magnitude of the All-Powerful God who simultaneously deeply knew and intimately loved him for him.

Only when we fix our full attention on the One who crafted our bodies and our hearts, can we truly love another. Only here, in the complete surrender of ourselves to the One who pursues us most passionately, can we discover that we can indeed be fully satisfied.

Here with God, who sees all and knows all, and died to forever slay our shame, can we dance gleefully with all the lights on, because we are fully known and fully loved.
Here, and only here, is where real satisfaction lives.

Oh! Taste and see that the Lord is good!
Blessed is the man who takes refuge in Him! (Psalm 34:8)

Come away, Beloved, the Lord is for you. (Psalm 118:5-6)
While every other Love in our lives will absolutely disappoint, only Jesus will fill us with overflowing delight. Be intent on knowing Him first and most, and let His knowing of you flood you with satisfaction.

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Don’t miss today’s Digging Deeper!     And we’d love to hear your thoughts from today’s Journey!    Comment Here!

Embracing God’s fullness in our lives is rooted in scripture and memorizing His word is vital to our continued growth and depth with Jesus. Tap and hold from your mobile device to download this week’s verse and make it your phone’s lockscreen!

Thanks for joining us today as we journeyed into Beloved Week Two! Don’t miss out on the discussion below – we’d love to hear your thoughts!
Click the above image for today’s Digging Deeper!

Looking for other journeys from this theme?
Here’s a link to all past studies in Beloved!

Blessed Day 9 Intimacy: Digging Deeper

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Digging Deeper Days

Finding the original intent of Scripture and making good application to our everyday lives as we become equipped to correctly handle the Word of Truth!

Yesterday’s Journey Study connects with today’s!
Check out Intimacy!

The Questions

1) Who are the lovers featured in Song of Solomon 7:1-13?

2) Why does the Bible include these passages about sex and intimacy?

3) What does it mean that the woman has treasured up every delicacy, old and new, for her love? (verse 13)

Song of Solomon 7:1-13

How beautiful are your sandaled feet, princess!
The curves of your thighs are like jewelry,
the handiwork of a master.
3 Your breasts are like two fawns,
twins of a gazelle.
4 Your neck is like a tower of ivory,
your eyes like pools in Heshbon
by Bath-rabbim’s gate.
Your nose is like the tower of Lebanon
looking toward Damascus.
5 Your head crowns you like Mount Carmel,
the hair of your head like purple cloth—
a king could be held captive in your tresses.
6 How beautiful you are and how pleasant,
my love, with such delights!
7 Your stature is like a palm tree;
your breasts are clusters of fruit.
8 I said, “I will climb the palm tree
and take hold of its fruit.”
May your breasts be like clusters of grapes,
and the fragrance of your breath like apricots.
9 Your mouth is like fine wine—

Woman
flowing smoothly for my love,
gliding past my lips and teeth!
10 I am my love’s,
and his desire is for me.

11 Come, my love,
let’s go to the field;
let’s spend the night among the henna blossoms.
12 Let’s go early to the vineyards;
let’s see if the vine has budded,
if the blossom has opened,
if the pomegranates are in bloom.
There I will give you my caresses.
13 The mandrakes give off a fragrance,
and at our doors is every delicacy,
both new and old.
I have treasured them up for you, my love.

Original Intent

1) Who are the lovers featured in Song of Solomon 7:1-13?
The biblical book Song of Solomon, or Song of Songs, as it is sometimes called, was written by Solomon sometime between 971 and 931 BC. Most scholars believe the lovers are Solomon and his wife, though which wife is not as clear. Author Tom Gledhill asserts in his book The Message of the Song of Songs that instead of being Solomon and his lover, “The couple are representative types of Everyman and Everywoman” (94) Whether we view Song of Solomon as a true love story between two specific people or simply as an example of a good marriage, there is much to be learned about love (both human and Divine) and intimate sex in the chapters given to us. Author Sharon Jaynes writes, “God made sure the explicit picture of romance and sexual intimacy is in the Bible for a reason (. . .) It’s as if He’s saying, this is how it’s done.” God gives us a road map for intimacy in marriage in Song of Solomon, but many theologians agree He is also giving us a picture of Jesus’ love for His Bride, the Church. Author Natalia Kohn suggests, “Solomon, the bridegroom, is meant to symbolize the powerful love of our eternal bridegroom, Jesus Christ. The Shulamite woman, our protagonist, models passion and love for her lover, a fascination with who He is, and a hunger for more of His love.” God wants us to love Him deeply and passionately, the way He loves us. (Ephesians 3:18) In giving us a guide for how to love our spouses well, God is also showing us how to love Him with fervent hearts and deepest devotion.

2) Why does the Bible include these passages about sex and intimacy?
If you read the Bible cover to cover, you won’t find another book like Song of Solomon full of romance, eroticism, poetry, and spiritual significance. While other Bible books mention love, sex, and romance, none enter into as much depth of description and creativity found in the Song of Solomon. Why would God include this evocative book about love and sex in His Scripture? God’s primary intention for including this evocative book on love and sex was likely to teach us how to view His amazing gift of sexual intimacy for married couples. Pastor Chuck Swindoll notes, “The fullness of the union that takes place at marriage is described in some of the most splendid poetic language in the entire Bible. In a world where so many speak of God’s special gifts with coldly clinical or apathetic statistical language, the passion of Solomon’s poetry refreshes a world thirsty for the truth about marriage.”  Many believe that beyond the literal description of human love and intimacy, Song of Solomon provides a sense of how deeply Christ loves His bride, the church. Author David Guzik writes, “We find that this great song of songs illustrates the love, the intensity, and the beauty of relationship that should exist between God and the believer.” The bride responds to her Lover in Song of Solomon 7:10 by proclaiming, “I am my Love’s, and his desire is for me.” This phrase alone exemplifies how God loves us and created us for a holy union with Him, and how He longs for us to recognize and accept His great love. The Song of Solomon is God’s two-fold gift to His people, for it teaches us how to nurture sexual intimacy and how to relate to a God who loves us extravagantly.

3) What does it mean that the woman has treasured up every delicacy, old and new, for her love? (verse 13)
In Song of Solomon 7:13, the woman invites her lover to come away with her to the vineyards, telling him “The mandrakes give off a fragrance, and at our doors is every delicacy, both new and old. I have treasured them up for you, my love.” According to commentator David Guzik, “This difficult to translate phrase may have the sense that she is inviting him to enjoy intimacy in ways that are both familiar and new to the couple. The idea would be they would enjoy their lovemaking in creative ways that were planned in advance by the maiden.” Indeed, the mention of mandrakes would indicate a literal meaning of sexual intimacy, for, as commentator David M. Carr points out, “The mandrake or ‘love apple’ is a pungently fragrant plant long considered an aphrodisiac.” There are also arguments that the “old and new delicacies” of Song of Solomon 7:13 hold a spiritual significance. Author Tim Keller suggests, “Sex is for fully committed marriage relationships because it is to be a foretaste of the joy that comes from being in complete union with God. The most rapturous love between a man and woman is only a hint of God’s love for us.”  The Bible provides this surprising guide to sex and marriage in the Song of Solomon to help us build intimacy in marriage, but it also instructs us that God gave the gift of sex within marriage to remind us of God’s intense love and deep longing for a covenant relationship with His people.

Everyday Application

1) Who are the lovers featured in Song of Solomon 7:1-13?
In Song of Solomon 7:1-9, Solomon is describing the beauty of his wife. He starts at her feet and moves all the way up to the crown of her head, appreciating every last detail he beholds. Some of the metaphors describing her beauty are easily understood, while others are lost on a modern reader. However, the love, romance, sensuality, and passion in the text are evident to readers of all eras. The couple knows one another so intimately that she takes up the steamy description in Song of Solomon 7:9, finishing his sentence for him. She knows she has his heart, and her words of love and desire are equally as symbolic and erotic as his are. King Solomon seems to be utterly in love with his bride, and she with him. It is confounding to me, then, that Solomon could love so deeply and so well and yet have a harem of wives and concubines, as seen in Song of Solomon 6:8 and I Kings 11:3. Why would God choose King Solomon, this woefully imperfect man, to pen this beautiful book about intimacy in marriage? Author David Guzik suggests, “Perhaps the Song of Solomon does not reflect Solomon’s actual experience – certainly not in an enduring sense – but his wise analysis and skillful presentation of the glory of romantic and sensual love.” It is difficult for me to accept admonitions from someone who made as many mistakes as Solomon did, but I must remember that 2 Timothy 3:16-17 says “all Scripture is inspired by God and is profitable for teaching, for rebuking, for correcting, for training in righteousness, so that the man of God may be complete, equipped for every good work.” God inspired the words of King Solomon, so I know I can trust its message is perfect and true, even though the human author was far from perfect.

2) Why does the Bible include these passages about sex and intimacy?
The Bible contains instruction on how to be a better parent, how to manage finances, and how to treat other people, but looking to the Bible for instruction on sex and intimacy seems…uncomfortable. In fact, when a pastor says to open our Bibles to the Song of Solomon, people tend to squirm. Nobody wants to hear the preacher read, “Your breasts are like two fawns, twins of a gazelle” (Song of Solomon 7:3)! If, however, we move past our discomfort of discussing sex in the Bible, we discover much about marital intimacy from God’s perspective. When describing the lovers in Song of Solomon, author Duane Garrett suggests “They relish their pleasure in each other not only with physical action, but with carefully composed words. Love is, above all, a matter of the mind and heart and should be declared.” Song of Solomon teaches us that thoughtful communication is part of a successful intimate relationship. We also learn from this book that God created sex to be a joyous celebration of love. Author C.J. Mahaney suggests, “Solomon’s Song teaches us that lovemaking is intended by God to be an elaborate and pleasurable feast of the senses — a holy immersion in erotic joy.”  C.J. Mahaney also concludes that the lovers do not have sex just to fulfill physical desire. “They want to be together because they are in love, and the sex they enjoy with one another is an expression of that love.” God has given us the Song of Solomon to show us how to have a fulfilling marriage, but it can also point us to having a fulfilling relationship with Jesus. As author Iain Duguid notes, “A depiction of the best of all loves and the most wonderful of marriages will inevitably turn our hearts toward Christ, who has truly loved us and is the answer for our deep brokenness.” No human relationship, regardless of how intimate or rewarding, can bring healing and restoration to our hearts like knowing Christ can. (Psalm 147:3)  Those of us who have trusted Jesus as our personal Savior make up His church, which He calls His Bride. (2 Corinthians 11:2) He loves us with the devotion of the husband in the Song of Solomon, and he wants us to be His faithful and loving bride.

3) What does it mean that the woman has treasured up every delicacy, old and new, for her love? (verse 13)
A recent societal buzzword has been purposeful or intentional. It is interesting to note how the Shulamite woman in the Song of Solomon does exactly this. She invites her husband to steal away with her, “Come, my love, let’s go to the field; let’s spend the night among the henna blossoms.   Let’s go early to the vineyards; let’s see if the vine has budded, if the blossom has opened, if the pomegranates are in bloom. There I will give you my caresses. The mandrakes give off a fragrance, and at our doors is every delicacy, both new and old. I have treasured them up for you, my love.” (Song of Solomon 7:11-13) She plans and initiates an intimate time with her husband on purpose. She chooses a romantic place and assures him she has treasured up delicacies, both old and new, for them to share. He has been pursuing her, saying, “Your head crowns you like Mount Carmel, the hair of your head like purple cloth—a king could be held captive in your tresses. How beautiful you are and how pleasant, my love, with such delights!” (Song of Solomon 7:5-6) The couple intentionally nurtures their unity and passion. Author Sharon Jaynes argues, “The Shulamite was a wise woman who took deliberate action to make her marriage sing with intimacy that was purposeful and playful. I envision her sauntering up to her husband as he’s overseeing the fields. She whispers in his ear, and her warm breath teases his neck. Tempting him. Flirting with him still. . . And God whispers to us through her words, this is one of the secrets to lifelong love. Pull away. Be intentional. Leave nothing to chance.” Many marriages start off with both partners making time for each other, but stressors and responsibilities dim the passion and purposefulness that once nourished intimacy. We would do well to heed the deliberate acts of the Shulamite woman. Their intimacy was worthy of their sacrifice in other areas. We all have responsibilities that need our attention, but none as important as our marriage relationship. Strong marriages can point others to the love of Christ! Let’s purpose to put our marriages ahead of other priorities.

What do YOU think?! Share Here!
Missing the connection to our other Journey Study?
Catch up with Intimacy!

Digging Deeper is for Everyone!

1) Take this passage (or any other passage).
2) Read it, and the verses around it,
several times
3) Write down your questions
as you think of them.
4) Ask specific culture related questions and be ready to dig around for your answers. Google them, use www.studylight.org, or look them up in a study Bible and read the footnotes (click on the little letters next to a word and it will show you
other related verses!). (www.esvbible.org)
5) Check your applications with other trusted Christians that you are in community with and embrace the fullness of God
in your everyday!

Digging Deeper Community

Share What You’ve Learned!
Pray Together!
Join us in the GT Facebook Community!

Our Current Study Theme!

This is Beloved Week Two!
Don’t miss out on the discussion!
Sign up to receive every GT Journey Study!

Why Dig Deeper?

Finding the original meaning is a huge deal when we study Scripture and can make all the difference in our understanding as we apply God’s truths to our everyday lives.

In our modern-day relationships, we want people to understand our original intention as we communicate; how much more so between God and humanity?!

Here’s a little bit more on why we take Digging Deeper so seriously.

Study Tools

We love getting help while we study and www.studylight.org is one of many excellent resources, providing the original Hebrew (Old Testament) or Greek (New Testament) with an English translation.

Want to know more about a specific word in a verse? Click on “Strong’s Interlinear Bible” then click the word you’d like to study. Discover “origin”, “definition” and hear the original pronunciation – That Is Awesome!

Want more background? Click “Study Tools”, then pick a few commentaries to read their scholarly approach, keeping in mind that just because a commentary says it, doesn’t mean it’s true. (just like the internet :-))

Memorize It!

Download this week’s verse and make it your phone’s lockscreen!
Tap and hold on your mobile device to save.

Beloved Day 8 Intimacy

Leave a Comment

Read His Words Before Ours!

Song of Solomon 4:1-7
Song of Solomon 7:1-13
Proverbs 5:15-23
Ecclesiastes 9:7-10
John 14:8-11

Beloved, Day 8

Intimacy.

There’s no other way of saying it: sexual intimacy within marriage is a gift hand-crafted by our incredible Creator God for the people He made in His image.

Throughout the Bible, there are countless examples of God’s created beings enjoying and participating in the gift of physical union. Early in Genesis, the Lord affirms the goodness of sex for the purpose of procreation. (Genesis 1:28) Just a little later in Genesis, we see Isaac comforted in his grief by physical union with Rebekah, which affirms the great comfort of sex in times of grief and loss. (Genesis 24:61-67) In Proverbs, Scripture also asserts sex for the purpose of physical pleasure and enjoyment is good. (Proverbs 5:15-23)

The entire book of the Song of Solomon extols the heady pleasures of physical desire and fulfillment found in the physical act of sex. Vivid descriptions, expressions of love, and honest dialogue about the emotional and physical experiences which accompany physical intimacy were poured over, examined, tested, and ultimately included in the canon of Scripture for a specific purpose. God gave us sex, and sex within the context of marriage between a man and a woman is a good, good thing.

Song of Solomon is a depiction of the literal joys of physical intimacy, but there are some traits we see exemplified in the two young lovers which warrant further exploration in the context of our own marriages.

They are transparent.
The two young lovers are obviously desirous for each other, but they are also completely transparent with others about the one to whom their thoughts, emotions and desires are drawn. They aren’t hiding the way they feel about their beloved; they are practically shouting it from the rooftops. There is no mistaking how they feel, what they want, and to whom their heart belongs.

They are honest with each other.
There’s no question the two are each in pursuit of the other. There is no sub-text and no veiled references. Neither is playing “hard to get.” There’s no competition, no game, no “prove your love to me.” They are each completely, totally, all in.

They are vulnerable.
Nothing is too intimate to share. No expression too outlandish, no description too flowery. There’s no thought of looking foolish, or saying something silly. Each feels completely safe with the other, and as a result they are unashamed to share their thoughts, emotions and desires.

They are purposeful.
They are willing to do practically anything to steal away for an encounter with the one they love. They talk of slipping away to a vineyard, to a quiet room, to his chambers. They are not embarrassed to say exactly what they want, and their actions support their words.

For a moment, let’s set aside all our expectations of our spouse and take a look at where we are.

Beloved, when we examine how we operate in the context of our own marriage, can we say the same? Are we transparent with our spouses? Do we create space for them to be transparent in return, without fear of us shutting down or refusing to respond? Are we honest? And if we aren’t “all in,” is that an area we need to confess to our Father and allow Him to touch? Are we vulnerable in sharing the intimate spaces of our bodies, yes, but even more importantly, our hearts and minds? Are we purposeful in our marriage? Do we choose to pursue our spouse every day, even when we don’t feel like it?

Let’s take it a step further. Are those traits present in our relationship with our Father? Are we transparent about the condition of our hearts and lives with the One Who holds the power to change us? Are we honest with Him about our thoughts and feelings? Do we surrender them to Him? Do we allow ourselves to be open and soft to His conviction, to His healing? And do we pursue radical intimacy with the God Who is with us? Do we consistently prioritize placing ourselves before Him, in all our humanity?

These are hard questions, aren’t they? I can’t say yes to all of them. 

Maybe you can’t, either.

So what do we do from here? Where do we go from this place of knowing we aren’t where we’d like to be, and recognizing we can’t move forward on our own?

We start with confessing where we’ve been, where we are, and where we’d like to be to our Bridegroom King. We acknowledge our definition of intimacy falls woefully short of the intimacy He designed for us to experience with Him, and we ask Him to show us the way. He alone is the Author of intimacy; we can trust Him to lead us into the fullness of all He created!

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Embracing God’s fullness in our lives is rooted in scripture and memorizing His word is vital to our continued growth and depth with Jesus. Tap and hold from your mobile device to download this week’s verse and make it your phone’s lockscreen!

Thanks for joining us today as we journeyed into Beloved Week Two! Don’t miss out on the discussion below – we’d love to hear your thoughts!

Looking for other journeys from this theme?
Here’s a link to all past studies in Beloved!

Beloved Day 5 Beloved’s Pursuit

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Read His Words Before Ours!

Song of Solomon 3:1-5
Proverbs 15:3-10
1 Timothy 6:6-14
Philippians 1:25-30
Ephesians 5:22-33

Beloved, day 5

Pursuit.

The mere word evokes images of a hunt, doesn’t it? It brings to mind words like… desiring, chasing, overtaking, capturing, conquering. 

There’s a reason such great emphasis is placed on “playing hard to get” in current culture. The human race has placed immense value on being the individual who is sought after, regardless of the situation or relationship dynamic. Whether we are interviewing for a new job, foraying into a new friendship, floating a corporate merger, or attempting to infuse “life” into our marriage, we have bought into the belief that the individual who is not easy to “win” holds a loftier, more powerful status.

But what if that narrative doesn’t exactly line up with what our Father shows us?

Song of Solomon is a beautiful portrayal of the joy, desire, and intimacy God has given the human race in the form of sex. We witness the intense desire, breathless longing, and yes, pursuit, of each party, laced across every page of the book. Physical pleasure aside, what do we see here?

I see a woman who longed for intimacy with her lover, but she didn’t merely pine away for him; she pursued him. She roamed city streets, looking for her love. She asked passing guards if they had seen him. When they told her they hadn’t, she kept looking. She didn’t give up until she’d found him. 

And when she found him, she did not let go.

The words are stirring, because we each long to be pursued like that, don’t we? We long to be so passionately pursued, so sought after, so desired, so wanted.

Before marriage, pursuit is mainly surface-deep. We show our beloved we are interested in all kinds of little ways. We learn more about the things they are interested in. We communicate many times, each day. Sometimes we choose clothing, or makeup, or jewelry, or hairstyles we know are appealing to them. We pursue their interests and desires, and in that pursuit, we assist them in pursuing us.

When we enter into marriage, the dynamic shifts. The “newness” begins to fade, and it’s easy for us to believe the pursuit actually ended with marriage.

Beloved, this isn’t so! Throughout the New Testament, marriage is repeatedly held up as the embodiment of Christ and His Church. Husbands and wives are exhorted to mirror Christ in the way we love one another. To submit to each other in love, not so one can lord their power over the other, rather, in this loving deference, Christ alone is glorified.

But what does this look like, five, ten, fifty years in? What does it look like beyond spontaneous romantic encounters and flowers for no reason?

Sometimes, it looks like waking up early to make him coffee.
Sometimes, it looks like showing up for his parents in their time of need.
Sometimes, it looks like slipping a hand in his when his voice wavers.
Sometimes, it looks like reminding him who he is when it seems he’s forgotten.
Sometimes, it looks like going to marriage counseling.
Sometimes, it looks like driving him to every treatment.
Sometimes, it looks like being silent when you want to scream.
Sometimes, it looks like recounting all the times the Lord has seen you both through, when it feels like all is lost.
Sometimes, it looks like following him down a dark road you never expected, taking him by the hand, and walking back into the light together.

Sometimes, it looks like staying when you want to leave.

Beloved, how many times has your Shepherd Bridegroom carried you back when you’ve wandered far? Has He found you, when you’ve tangled yourself in all the places you never belonged? Has His voice been gentle as He quieted your fears and brought you back to His fold?

He invites us to love our husbands this way, too. To pursue them, gently, completely, guilelessly.

Marriage is not an end to an exciting pursuit; it’s an open invitation into the lifelong adventure in the pursuit of our lover, and to being pursued in return!

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Blessed Day 4 Blessed Are Those Who Mourn: Digging Deeper

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Digging Deeper Days

Finding the original intent of Scripture and making good application to our everyday lives as we become equipped to correctly handle the Word of Truth!

Yesterday’s Journey Study connects with today’s!
Check out Blessed Are Those Who Mourn!

The Questions

1) What events caused King David to mourn so deeply before the Lord?

2) Matthew 5:4 says, “Blessed are those who mourn…” What blessing was David praying for?

3) How did God comfort David?

Psalm 51:6-13

Surely you desire integrity in the inner self,
and you teach me wisdom deep within.
7 Purify me with hyssop, and I will be clean;
wash me, and I will be whiter than snow.
8 Let me hear joy and gladness;
let the bones you have crushed rejoice.
9 Turn your face away from my sins
and blot out all my guilt.

10 God, create a clean heart for me
and renew a steadfast spirit within me.
11 Do not banish me from your presence
or take your Holy Spirit from me.
12 Restore the joy of your salvation to me,
and sustain me by giving me a willing spirit.
13 Then I will teach the rebellious your ways,
and sinners will return to you.

Original Intent

1) What events caused King David to mourn so deeply before the Lord?
The prophet Nathan came to David one day telling him a story of two men: One poor, the other rich. The rich man had many sheep, but the poor man had only one lamb. The lamb was dear to the family and loved like a pet. One day, the rich man had a visitor and he needed to serve him dinner. But rather than slaughtering one of his own sheep, he took the poor man’s sheep and served it to his guest. When King David heard this story, he was furious. Then Nathan said to David, “You are the man!’” (2 Samuel 12:7-9) The whole sordid story can be found in 2 Samuel 11-12. When Nathan confronted David with his sin, David was immediately mournful and confessed his sin before God. David wasn’t repentant because he had been caught in his sin, but he realized he had sinned against God. His fellowship with God had been severed; this is what caused his great mourning.

2) Matthew 5:4 says, “Blessed are those who mourn…” What blessing was David praying for?
David’s sin was crushing his soul during this time. He must have been relieved to be found out and his sin exposed because this is when healing of our hearts can begin. In the many months between the time when David committed these sins and his confession, he had not escaped the sense of sin, it was always before him. (verse 3) He could not escape his sinfulness. He was miserable in his sin, as a child of God should be. (Guzik) When Nathan confronted him, he became very aware of the heaviness of heart that had been there all along. He knew his body ached to have that fellowship once again with the Father. In Psalm 32:3-4, David writes, “When I kept silent, my bones became brittle from my groaning all day long. For day and night your hand was heavy on me; my strength was drained as in the summer’s heat.” David desired to be cleansed from his sin and his sin blotted out. He wanted to be able to rejoice in the Lord once again. (Psalm 51:7-9). Again, we see in Psalm 32, he wrote of how good it is to be forgiven. “How joyful is the one whose transgression is forgiven; whose sin is covered! How joyful is a person whom the Lord does not charge with iniquity and in whose spirit is no deceit!”

3) How did God comfort David?
God comforted David foremost by returning His Spirit to David. His spirit was made right with God giving him the fellowship he desired once again. Though his son would die, God did not take Bathsheba away from him; indeed, their second son, Solomon, became the next king of Israel and God allowed Solomon the privilege of building the temple. God kept his promise to keep David’s family in the throne of Israel. David had a third son with Bathsheba, Nathan, who is the son in which the line of David (through Mary) would bring Jesus into the World. (Luke 3:23-38) What a comfort to have a new spirit, David was once again willing to serve God as He prescribed. David was again able to teach others about the joy of salvation and to sing of His righteousness and declare God’s praise. And ultimately, draw others to God.

Everyday Application

1) What events caused King David to mourn so deeply before the Lord?
The prophet Nathan came to David and confronted him about his sin. And David mourned. While we may have leaders or friends we are accountable to, more deeply, we have the Holy Spirit living within every believer, guiding our actions and convicting us of sin. If we are in tune with the Spirit, we mourn when we realize we have allowed sin to creep into our lives. The Apostle Paul mourned at his inability to please God. He wrote how we all know what is right, but we don’t do it. (Romans 7:14-25) Just as David cried out in Psalm 51, so did Paul cry out his mournful repentance. We also struggle with our carnal nature in keeping God’s law. C.S. Lewis said, “No man knows how bad he is until he has tried to be good.” (Enduring Word, Romans 7) But Praise God! “His divine power has given us everything required for life and godliness through the knowledge of him who called us by his own glory and goodness.” (2 Peter 1:3) After we are saved, the Holy Spirit dwells in us, guides us, and convicts us of sin. We could not follow Jesus without His power. However, we cannot experience His power without totally yielding to Him. From the moment of spiritual birth, the Holy Spirit indwells, or resides in, every Christian. But to be controlled by the Holy Spirit, we must, as an act of our wills, completely surrender our lives in obedience to Christ. (Vonette Bright, CRU, Campus Crusade for Christ)

2) Matthew 5:4 says, “Blessed are those who mourn…” What blessing was David praying for?
The Apostle Paul shares with us in Romans 5:1-5 some of the blessings of our salvation.
“Therefore, since we have been justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ. We have also obtained access through him by faith into this grace in which we stand, and we boast in the hope of the glory of God… But where sin multiplied, grace multiplied even more so that, just as sin reigned in death, so also grace will reign through righteousness, resulting in eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord.” Romans 5:20-21 There is no greater blessing than the joy found in forgiveness. Bill Gaither wrote, “Oh the joy that floods my soul!” A new song bubbles up with joy in our heart when we are forgiven and cleansed forever. And the Victory! He sought me and bought me with His redeeming blood! (Bartlett). What a treasure we have in this wonderful peace… For I’m kept from all danger by night and by day, And His glory is flooding my soul!” (Cornel) What a blessing to be found in Christ. Have you found the joy of salvation? Have you mourned over your sin and repented to God?

3) God comforted David. How does God comfort us?
The Holy Spirit is our Comforter. When we sin against God and hurt others, it is as if we can’t breathe. I remember times when I have hurt others, I was afraid to go to them and confess. I feared their rejection and possible retaliation. But once I confessed and received that forgiveness, I could breathe again. My fear disappeared; my heart was comforted in the restoration of fellowship and a wonderful peace overtook my spirit. While believers never need to fear that the Holy Spirit will be removed from us, He is our permanent seal, our fellowship with God through the Spirit can be estranged and broken by our sin.
Yesterday, in her Journey Study, Lori said, “on the other side of mourning are abundant blessings.” Revelation 21:4 reminds us, “He will wipe away every tear from their eyes. Death will be no more; grief, crying, and pain will be no more.”  Our vision is clouded by the sin we allow to persist by not fully addressing it or trying to excuse it. But if we are faithful to humble ourselves (I mean true, honest to goodness, on-our-knees-humbling ourselves) before God, then He is faithful to wipe away our tears and forgive our sin (1 John 1:9).  What a comfort to be completely forgiven and filled with His Spirit. And what an even greater comfort on the day when He wipes away every tear from our eyes forever!

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Digging Deeper is for Everyone!

1) Take this passage (or any other passage).
2) Read it, and the verses around it,
several times
3) Write down your questions
as you think of them.
4) Ask specific culture related questions and be ready to dig around for your answers. Google them, use www.studylight.org, or look them up in a study Bible and read the footnotes (click on the little letters next to a word and it will show you
other related verses!). (www.esvbible.org)
5) Check your applications with other trusted Christians that you are in community with and embrace the fullness of God
in your everyday!

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Why Dig Deeper?

Finding the original meaning is a huge deal when we study Scripture and can make all the difference in our understanding as we apply God’s truths to our everyday lives.

In our modern-day relationships, we want people to understand our original intention as we communicate; how much more so between God and humanity?!

Here’s a little bit more on why we take Digging Deeper so seriously.

Study Tools

We love getting help while we study and www.studylight.org is one of many excellent resources, providing the original Hebrew (Old Testament) or Greek (New Testament) with an English translation.

Want to know more about a specific word in a verse? Click on “Strong’s Interlinear Bible” then click the word you’d like to study. Discover “origin”, “definition” and hear the original pronunciation – That Is Awesome!

Want more background? Click “Study Tools”, then pick a few commentaries to read their scholarly approach, keeping in mind that just because a commentary says it, doesn’t mean it’s true. (just like the internet :-))

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